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The "cool" kids in elementary school

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EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

The "cool" kids in elementary school

I can't believe it's already starting and it's only 5th grade. My 10 year old has a lot of friends. Some are in that group and some not. My son just like to hang out and play. Both boys and girls are some of his closest friends.
WEll now it's getting tough bc close friends of ours have a son who used to be closer with my son, but told him basically he's hanging out with the "cool" kids. My son told me his friend Josh said that to him. I am at the school a lot bc I'm on the board and chair a lot of events so I do see a lot of change in this boy Josh too. He was such a good kid and now getting in trouble, lying to teachers, etc.

My son is best friends with a popular boy and have known each other since they were 3. Now his friend Josh is trying to pull him away from my son.
Funny thing is my son doesn't care. He just likes hanging with friends and playing sports. He's on a lot of group chats and doesn't even get into them. Just wants to do his thing and be happy.
I totally hate this time where kids change bc they want to be more "popular" At least for now my son isn't effected so much and has a lot of good friends too

Posted 1/24/20 8:10 AM
 

Funkybutt
LIF Adult

Member since 4/15

3049 total posts

Name:

The

Yeah, my son is like that, too - just wants to hang out and not care about stuff. For a while, he's had a group of friends that he mostly played with, but he's also really cool about playing with the kids in after school - whether or not they're in his grade. It's only this year that I've noticed his circle of friends getting "smaller" (5 boys).

Posted 1/24/20 8:44 AM
 

LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!

Member since 5/05

19453 total posts

Name:
L

Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

Friend groups ebb and flow in middle school. Just keep building your son’s self confidence. Reinforce saying no to drugs, how to deal with peer pressure, how to be a friend, how to stand up for himself and to bullies. It is so difficult navigating this time, but it does get better after high school. Remind them even though this is like half of his life, once out of high school it becomes a smaller and smaller portion of a life and those that peak in high school tend to be miserable adults.

Posted 1/24/20 12:59 PM
 

ml110
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

5435 total posts

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The

Stuff like this makes me kind of glad that my 9 year old 3rd grader doesn't really have a social life outside of school HAHA he goes to school, gets through the day and is friendly with the kids while hes there, and then comes home and hangs out with his brother (kindergarten) and me for 5 hours until bedtime LOL its exhausting for me, because he never has anywhere to go besides being at home... but, at least we avoid this kind of "drama". LOL

Posted 1/26/20 2:04 PM
 

Budjeg11
LIF Adult

Member since 4/11

2642 total posts

Name:

The

I'll match your cool kid drama and raise you one kindergartener who told me that she walked around at recess by herself bc her bf was absent and she couldn't very well hang out with the "cool girls" in her class. Blind. Blown.

Posted 1/28/20 3:31 PM
 

Adri
Joy!

Member since 5/05

3116 total posts

Name:
A

Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

Yes, I remember it happened when DS was in 5th grade and continued through MS. There were 2 groups of kids and they called themselves "the populars" and "the nerd herds". DS was a on the second group Chat Icon but the 2 groups played together during recess because they all liked sports.

I noticed that the "popular kids" were more independent, going to the play ground by themselves, going outside without parents, just hanging out. The good thing with boys is that they are not too clicky, so DS was perfectly ok talking to kids in both groups. Now, 4 years later, I'm very glad he wasn't in the popular group, because those kids were getting in constant trouble in MS, probably because they were more independent to begin with.

Posted 1/28/20 4:26 PM
 

EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

Posted by Budjeg11

I'll match your cool kid drama and raise you one kindergartener who told me that she walked around at recess by herself bc her bf was absent and she couldn't very well hang out with the "cool girls" in her class. Blind. Blown.



What? In kindergarten. Ugh!
This is crazy.

Posted 1/29/20 9:03 AM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

9506 total posts

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Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

OMG I am having so many issues with my 4th grade daughter's grade. I almost came on to write a separate post. It almost all relates to birthday parties and only inviting the cool kids or inviting almost all of the girls in the class except one or two. I feel like it bothers me more than it bothers her thou so I am trying to just stay out of it. I have considered looking at alternatives for high school and/or middle school though if it starts to impact her.

Posted 2/10/20 11:53 AM
 

EricaAlt
LIF Adult

Member since 7/08

22665 total posts

Name:
Erica

Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

Posted by lululu

OMG I am having so many issues with my 4th grade daughter's grade. I almost came on to write a separate post. It almost all relates to birthday parties and only inviting the cool kids or inviting almost all of the girls in the class except one or two. I feel like it bothers me more than it bothers her thou so I am trying to just stay out of it. I have considered looking at alternatives for high school and/or middle school though if it starts to impact her.



It sucks! I know it bothers me more too and DS is just like... whatever. He has lots of friends, but it bothers me kids are changing already. I agree. It'll only get worse, but as long as they are good kids and not everyone has to be their friends. I tell DS he has to be nice to everyone, but doesn't have to be friends with everyone. Anyone who is mean is not happy with themselves. Just to ignore them and stick to the friends that are there for them

Posted 2/11/20 10:50 AM
 

nycgirl
Angels!

Member since 3/09

7721 total posts

Name:

Re: The "cool" kids in elementary school

Posted by lululu

OMG I am having so many issues with my 4th grade daughter's grade. I almost came on to write a separate post. It almost all relates to birthday parties and only inviting the cool kids or inviting almost all of the girls in the class except one or two. I feel like it bothers me more than it bothers her thou so I am trying to just stay out of it. I have considered looking at alternatives for high school and/or middle school though if it starts to impact her.



I hear ya. This happened to my daughter... but she ended up becoming besties with the girl whose party she was invited to 2 days before. That girl’s mom still feels guilty. BUT it does make me super sensitive to either have a micro/ family party or be sure to invite ALL girls in class. It didn’t effect my DD.

Posted 2/11/20 4:56 PM
 
 

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