So I am finally going to ask...

I have been putting off asking this because it is a little embarrassing but I figure there are possibly others out there that are going through the same thing.

I am overweight. Not 10 or 20 pounds or even 30 pounds. But very overweight. My primary physician had recommended that I lose at least 30 pounds before I start TTC. However, I also spoke with my ob/gyn and they said that they are more concerned with my age rather than my weight and told me not to hold off. We have been not been using birth control since July, actively trying since January.

I am wondering if anyone else is dealing with weight as an added factor to TTC. If you'd rather discuss in private feel free to FM me.

Thanks

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

i'm really glad you posted this. i am overweight. and by overweight, i mean.....seriously overweight. like....100 pounds overweight i lost a baby in sept and gained THIRTY pounds as a result of the pregnancy and the loss. i haven't taken off one pound. i think about this pretty much everyday. before i ever gained that 30 pounds...my prior ob told me i couldn't start TTC before i lost weight. she made me cry and i thought she was horribly insensitive so i switched ob's. my current ob has never mentioned it. i think my age is a factor as well...i am 33 and they'd rather not have me wait. when i was pregnant, they told me that my weight would be monitored closely and they wanted me to exercise at least 3x/week once i got to my 2nd trimester. since i never got that far in the pregnancy i never had to worry about it but i'm SURE that will still apply for next time around.

i totally wish i was younger and could spend time taking the weight off before TTC again but oh well...here i am. i try to do the best that i can and know that once i do get pregnant i will have to be extra careful. beyond that, i really try not to stress about it too much. there are PLENTY of overweight women out there who get preggo and have healthy babies so i try to focus on that instead of all the scary stuff some doctors will tell you.

sorry for such a long post! this is definitely something that hits home for me!!

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

i did. before i concieved, i was having trouble with PCOS: my hormones were out of wack and I was having trouble losing weight. my OB sent me to an awesome nutritionist, i lost weight, and started ovulating. Are you in the suffolk area? losing weight will help you for sure!

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

I'm also overweight, about 40lbs. My OB hasn't said anything about me losing weight, but I have my first appointment with an RE on May 3rd. and I'm sure it will come up.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

It is an embarrassing subject because we never want to admit that being overweight could prevent us from TTC. I am overweight as well and like you its not just 10, 20 or 30 lbs it is a lot. When I spoke to my doctor about TTC she said that my weight wasn't too concerning but that when I become PG my weight gain should be monitored because I should not gain too much or any at all during the pregnancy.

I try not to think about my weight because like another poster said so many overweight woman get PG and have healthy babies.

If we are not successful this month then I am going to see an RE next month. I'm sure my weight will be discussed and I am going to continue to try and eat healthier and exercise. With the warmer weather it motivates me to get out and take my dog for a walk or to the park and actually do physical activities.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

When I went to my ob to discuss TTC after we have failed for a few months, she recommend that I lose weight, I have gained 50 lbs in the matter of 3.5 years (I blame DH lol) ... So I decided to TTC and eat right/excersice. DH stopped smoking and we both took vitamins...after 2 months after the appt. I got Pregnant...so instead of loosing the weight then TTC I would do both at the same time.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Well...I lost my first PG and I gained about 30 pds during it. So I have that to shed. I am currently down 15 and I think I am fine the way I am but I would like to be my starting weight b/c I know when I get prego I will gain.

Im working out now and I asked my doc if its ok to workout and diet and he said do it in moderation....so thats what I am doing..its ok to TTC and try to loose some pounds....

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Im not dealing with this now that im TTC but have struggled with weight all my life.

I successfully managed to stay at a healthy weight a few years ago once i read this book - Overcoming Overeating. It gives you the tools to deal with the reasons for overeating instead of dieting.

Anyway just wanted to give you cause i know how hard it is.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

I just want to say thank you to everyone who responded, either here or in FM. It is so nice to know that I am not the only one dealing with this and that while it may be difficult to talk about, there are others who are going through the same thing and are willing to talk about it.

I was afraid in my first post that I wasn't going to get any responses and kind of held back a bit in what I wrote. Now that I feel a bit more comfortable, I want to share a bit more.

I am obese. In order to hit my "ideal" weight, I would need to lose more than half of my current weight. That will never, ever happen. I don't know know if anyone else has ever watched the shows "Obese and Pregnant" and the other one, I don't remember what the name of it is. Holy Cr@p, did they scare the sh!t out of me! I kept thinking the entire time, "That's going to be me"

I am currently trying to lose weight. DH and I are joining the gym. Dh is also overweight, not nearly as bad as I am and he has been doing great in losing it. Thankfully, I am pretty "healthy" otherwise and my concern with the weight primarily comes from the fact that I am worried that it is going to inhibit our ability to get pregnant. I kind of beat myself up because it is hard enough trying to get pregnant without this added thing that I can actually do something about looming over us.

I am worried how I will manage being pregnant. I look at the belly pics of pregnant ladies and think, "I have a bigger belly now, and this woman is 20 weeks pregnant! " I can't imagine what it is going to be like. As PPers said, women have been getting pregnant and having babies since the beginning of time, even overweight women. I know that eventually it will happen for me also, and the rest of us.

Thanks for letting me get that off my (very large ) chest.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

well if you live in suffolk, and would like the info on the nutritionist i went to, FM me. He is fantastic, and now most of the employees in the ER i work in have been going to him, with phenominal results, even obese patients!! it's worth a shot!
good luck hun!

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Posted by MrsC614

well if you live in suffolk, and would like the info on the nutritionist i went to, FM me. He is fantastic, and now most of the employees in the ER i work in have been going to him, with phenominal results, even obese patients!! it's worth a shot!
good luck hun!

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Posted by AMPirate

Posted by MrsC614

well if you live in suffolk, and would like the info on the nutritionist i went to, FM me. He is fantastic, and now most of the employees in the ER i work in have been going to him, with phenominal results, even obese patients!! it's worth a shot!
good luck hun!

Thanks so much!

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Oh girlfriend I am right there with you, it totally stinks and I've actually gained since we started TTC, it is what it it is, everyday I just get up and try and make better choices with my eating, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. My biggest motivation is trying to make this body as hospitable to a little one as I can :)

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

You wrote "I look at the belly pics of pregnant ladies and think, "I have a bigger belly now, and this woman is 20 weeks pregnant!"

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Posted by AMPirate


I am worried how I will manage being pregnant. I look at the belly pics of pregnant ladies and think, "I have a bigger belly now, and this woman is 20 weeks pregnant! " I can't imagine what it is going to be like. As PPers said, women have been getting pregnant and having babies since the beginning of time, even overweight women. I know that eventually it will happen for me also, and the rest of us.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Oh I know how you feel. I am somewhere around 100 pounds overweight, maybe a little less. I did lose about 50 pounds on WW and was on it when we started TTC, but then I found it had to focus on that and TTC so I gave it up when we started. I expressed my concerns to my doc and he said I shouldn't put off having a child because of my weight. He said it's possible I may even lose weight while PG if I eat right. And breastfeeding can cause you to lose weight.

Now that it's nice out I do plan to start walking in the evenings to try to be more active. I'll hopefully continue that when PG. The Metformin is helping me to not be hungry so much, so I'm really trying to pay attention to my body and only eat when I'm hungry.

My biggest concern is I have MAJOR back problems and I'm worried they will only get worse with pregnancy and I'll be forced to have the surgery I don't want to have. But both my OB/Gyn and back surgeon told me it may or may not be an issue and again, I shouldn't put off having a child because of it.

After 10 months of TTC, I'm glad I didn't put it off any longer.

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

I can't tell you how relieved I am to read this post. It's good to know that there are others on this board that are dealing with the same issue. Being overweight has been something I've been dealing with my whole life and TTC has made me really worry about it. We've been TTC for close to two years and I often wonder if I was thinner would I be having the trouble I am.

I've been seeing a fertility doctor for about 9 months and we're at the point where IVF is probably going to be my next step. Since I'm about 80lbs overweight I'd like to lose some weight before I go through IVF. But then again, I'm 36 so I really don't want to wait.

Maybe we should have our own post where we can all check in with each other?????

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Re: So I am finally going to ask...

Another plus size person. I'd like to lose a few, but in reality could lose a lot.

My doc didn't say a word about weight when I told him that DH and I would be TTC. He literally only told me to take prenatals and to have fun! It isn't a huge worry in my head, but I know it isn't the best. I've already realized I won't be posting baby bump pictures when the time comes for a LONG time.

My sister is 'extremely' plus size and I know when she was pregnant, she actually LOST weight. She obviously was being monitored and all that.