LI Barbies

got this email today




ANNOUNCEMENT: Mattel has recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Long Island, NY market. They are:

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North Shore, Nassau County Barbie :
This princess Barbie is sold only at Roosevelt Field Mall and Walt Whitman Mall. She comes with several Prada and Louis Vuitton handbags, a Guess watch, Lexus SUV and a foreign dog named "Honey". Her Glen Cove mansion and Gotti family neighbors sold separately.

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Manorville Barbie
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind Star Mini-van and matching gym outfit. Included is a King Kullen grocery store and Hunter's Run or Frontier Trail Dream House When you press the button on her back she screams at her kids "Hurry up and get in the van, we have to go pick up your father up at the 6:20 train in Ronkonkoma!" Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

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North Bellport Barbie
This Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, and 4 summons to appear in Islip Central Court. Also included is a Chevy truck with dark tinted windows and a meth lab kit. Her Station Rd. crack house is sold separately and is only available for purchase after dark and must be paid in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills)….unless you're a Suffolk County cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

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Hamptons Barbie
This posh Barbie comes with your choice of a Mercedes S500 or Hummer H2.
Included is her own Starbucks coffee cup, AMEX Gold cards, tennis membership to the Maidstone Club and gift certificates for Saks 5th Ave- Southampton and Ralph Lauren in East Hampton. Also available is "Shallow Ken" and "Private School Skipper". Your choice of a Georgica Pond or Dune Rd. mansion. You won't be able to afford any of them.





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Sayville Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Sayville Barbies
and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free


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Mastic Beach Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and a bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.


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Cherry Grove, Fire Island Barbie/Ken

This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.

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Re: LI Barbies

Too funny!! I love it!!

Re: LI Barbies

wow...sayville barbie? interesting perception.

Re: LI Barbies

Re: LI Barbies

North Shore Barbie is off course, too. It should say "She only shops at the Americana and wears a Rolex, not a Guess watch"

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by Michelle

Posted by kmac

wow...sayville barbie? interesting perception.

I am not seeing this one either?

Re: LI Barbies

Uh-oh.

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by dita

Posted by Michelle

Posted by kmac

wow...sayville barbie? interesting perception.

I am not seeing this one either?

I don't see that at all.

Re: LI Barbies

Gotti neighbors are Old Westbury!!!

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by rojerono

Posted by dita

Posted by Michelle

Posted by kmac

wow...sayville barbie? interesting perception.

I am not seeing this one either?

I don't see that at all.

I think it is because of the fact that Sayville is a 'gay friendly' community? I guess they are saying that Sayville Barbie is a butch type lesbian?

I guess I gotta start straightening my hair and growing my armpit hair. Anyone know where I can get a good pair of Birks?

Re: LI Barbies

It used to say Huntington for the description under Sayville?

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by TheLorax
I was thinking they were saying South shore is more liberal types and the Sayville girl was hippie-esque.

Re: LI Barbies

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by Ladybug63

It used to say Huntington for the description under Sayville?

Re: LI Barbies

This is a common email that they change the town name for. There is one for "Brooklyn Barbies" and they use the description for "Sayville Barbie" to describe "Park Slope Barbie" (which is probably more appropriate). It is funny nonetheless.

Re: LI Barbies

I've lived in Sayville my whole life (including now) and that is SOOO off. Who on earth wrote that?

Re: LI Barbies

PIMP at Cherry Grove Barbie

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by Michelle

Posted by kmac

wow...sayville barbie? interesting perception.

I am not seeing this one either?

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by leighla

Uh-oh.

Re: LI Barbies

I haven't been to li lately...I don't remember is manorville close to ronkonkoma?
Where is Islip Central Court?

Re: LI Barbies

Posted by LaPetiteSirène

I've lived in Sayville my whole life (including now) and that is SOOO off. Who on earth wrote that?

Re: LI Barbies

found the complete line:

ahhh...the memories!!!!


Mineola Barbie- This Modern Day Retro-Barbie comes with Two Teeth, Acid Washed Jeans, Leg Warmers, White Reeboks, Feathered Hair and a Double Ring Belt (Yes it is 2004). She also comes with Ken, her brother/boyfriend, complete with house arrest bracelet and Dodge Neon. Parole Officer Sold Separately.

Hempstead Barbie- This Barbie comes with Hoop Earrings, Hair Weave, Food
Stamps, a bus pass, a search warrant, and a court date. She also comes
with three babies and three different Ken's (Baby's Daddies). Each Ken comes with his own bag of weed. (Sold separately and on a Street Corner)

New Cassel Barbie- (Not Available)
Who are you kidding? No one wants anything from New Cassel.

Brentwood Barbie - This Spanish-speaking-only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and four baby Barbies in the back-seat (no car seats). The optional Ken doll comes with a paint-bucket, lunch pail, and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green cards are not available for Brentwood Barbie or Ken.

Garden City Barbie- This princess Barbie is only sold at Saks Fifth Avenue. She comes with an assortment of Coach handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired dog named Honey, and a 3500-square foot house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. *** (rear end) not available. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

Herricks Barbie- This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic-jamming cell phone included, headset sold separately.

Uniondale Barbie - This recently paroled former "#### Actress" Barbie comes
with a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a meth-lab kit. This model is
only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop then we don't know what you are talking about.

Great Neck Barbie - This stuck-up yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Hicksville Barbie - This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Coors Light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD
set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's *** when she
is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Roslyn Barbie - This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie comes with take-out menus, lunch dates, and vacation homes. She wears only the most expensive clothes that either her daddy or hen-pecked hubby Ken pay for. She rarely has a job, yet is never home to take care of her own kids. Comes with Lawyer Ken. Optional housekeeper/nanny sold separately. But you better get one for her or she'll never shut up.

Levittown Barbie - This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gut Ken out of Bristol Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter top. Also available with a mobile home.

Huntington Barbie - This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow." She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Huntington Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free.

New Hyde Park Barbie - This Italian Princess Barbie comes with teased black hair, 12 gold chains, 7 gold bracelets, 8 rings and 1 ankle bracelet. Included are a permanently attached cell phone and a black Monte Carlo with ILUVTONY license plates. The accompanying Ken doll has been replaced with a black haired Tony doll with hairy chest and gel/hairdryer kit.

Message edited 7/17/2007 9:34:15 PM.

Re: LI Barbies

Re: LI Barbies

Merrick Barbie:
This is the knock-off wearing, fake-nail-sporting, paying-for-her-Lexus-lease-by-the-skin-of-her-teeth, "low-rent" version of Roslyn Barbie. She aspires to be Great Neck Barbie. Due to incessant Merrick Barbie nagging, Ken is happily anatomically correct.


Now THIS one is my favorite from the old post. I live there, so I have the right to agree.

Re: LI Barbies

Suffolk County Edition:

Mastic/Shirley Barbie:This Modern Day Retro-Barbie comes with Two Teeth, Acid Washed Jeans, Leg Warmers, White Reeboks, Feathered Hair and a Double Ring Belt (Yes it is 2007). She also comes with Ken, her brother/boyfriend, complete with house arrest bracelet and Dodge Neon. Parole Officer Sold Separately.

North Amityville Barbie: This Barbie comes with Hoop Earrings, Hair Weave, Food Stamps, a bus pass, a search warrant, and a court date. She also comes with three babies and three different Ken's (Baby Daddies). Each Ken comes with his own bag of weed. (Sold Separately and on a Street Corner)

Brentwood/Central Islip Barbie: This Spanish-speaking-only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and four baby Barbies in the back-seat (no car seats). The optional Ken doll comes with a paint-bucket lunch pail and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green cards are not available for Brentwood/Central Islip Barbie or Ken, however decals of blue and white flags are available for purchase.

Nisseqogue/Bell Terre Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at Saks Fifth Avenue. She comes with an assortment of Coach handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired dog named Honey, and a 3500-square foot house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

Selden Barbie: This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic-jamming cell phone included, headset sold separately.

Hampton Bays Barbie: This recently paroled former "Porn Actress" Barbie comes with a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a meth-lab kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash.
Preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

Setauket Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Riverhead Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Coors Light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's *** when she is drunk.
Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Port Jefferson Barbie: This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print bikini outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at the McMansion. Percocet prescription available.

Ridge/Rocky Point Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gut Ken out of Bristol Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter top. Also available with a mobile home.