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RayRay13
LIF Infant
Member since 7/14 155 total posts
Name:
RayRay
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Wedding gift
Ok... I have a question for you all. My husband and I do not agree on this and we need to hear from you! So I have a co-worker that I've worked very close with for the past 13 years. When he and his wife (ex now) came to my wedding 8 years ago they gave us $350. Now he is getting remarried. His fiancé has never been married so they're having a big wedding. We are disagreeing on what we should give. We are not in a great position financially as my husband recently lost his job and we have 2 kids. For each child, he has given us gifts for the kids btw.... I think we should give $250-$300 ( leaning towards $300). My husband thinks $200-$225 is fine. Help!!
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Posted 7/29/17 4:47 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Dolphinsbaby
My 3 little guys!
Member since 12/10 2943 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding gift
If it won't be a financial hardship for you, I would say $300. If it will impact you, just give what you can afford.
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| Posted 7/29/17 5:04 PM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Wedding gift
I give what was given to me - so $350. Usually aware of such events in advance, when I wasn't able to come up with the $ - I would save for it.
As a guy, I doubt very highly he paid attention to what he gave you that long ago. So in that case, if money is really that tight, you can probably give the $250.
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| Posted 7/29/17 5:54 PM |
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BabyBearA
LIF Adult
Member since 7/11 1254 total posts
Name:
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Wedding gift
350.
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| Posted 7/29/17 7:04 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Wedding gift
I usually give what we were given, but because of your financial reasons, I would try for the $300. If you can't swing that, then maybe you can find a middle ground between what your husband wants to give and what you want to give.
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| Posted 7/29/17 7:53 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Wedding gift
$350
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| Posted 7/29/17 7:54 PM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: Wedding gift
Posted by Dolphinsbaby
If it won't be a financial hardship for you, I would say $300. If it will impact you, just give what you can afford.
This
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| Posted 7/29/17 9:02 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15660 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding gift
I would give what you can afford. I'm surprised people remember what others gave them. That's a good memory!
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| Posted 7/29/17 9:41 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding gift
Posted by BargainMama
I would give what you can afford. I'm surprised people remember what others gave them. That's a good memory!
i actually wrote down what everyone gave me in a journal and still have it because a family member and a friend both suggested I do that. When friends/family members get married now, i just open up the journal and match what they gave us
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| Posted 7/29/17 10:21 PM |
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CAH127
LIF Adult
Member since 7/07 1694 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding gift
$350
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| Posted 7/29/17 11:13 PM |
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!
Member since 6/07 8274 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Wedding gift
$300 or 350 if you can
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| Posted 7/29/17 11:42 PM |
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Maybe-Baybe
My Sunshine
Member since 7/12 3415 total posts
Name:
My only Sunshine
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Re: Wedding gift
Posted by Dolphinsbaby
If it won't be a financial hardship for you, I would say $300. If it will impact you, just give what you can afford.
Agreed
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| Posted 7/30/17 4:37 AM |
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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name:
Christina
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Re: Wedding gift
If your coworker knows your DH recently lost his job, then I think $300 is okay. But if not $300, then $350.
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| Posted 7/30/17 8:12 AM |
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!
Member since 5/11 7632 total posts
Name:
Momma <3
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Re: Wedding gift
To the OP, give what you can afford. If you can't afford $300 give less.
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by BargainMama
I would give what you can afford. I'm surprised people remember what others gave them. That's a good memory!
i actually wrote down what everyone gave me in a journal and still have it because a family member and a friend both suggested I do that. When friends/family members get married now, i just open up the journal and match what they gave us
I feel like this works to a point. I've been married over 10 years at this point so that information is now outdated. Plus I got married right out of college - 23/25. Most of my friends gave relatively small monetary gifts. We're now in our mid-30s so situations have drastically changed.
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| Posted 7/30/17 8:34 AM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding gift
Posted by PitterPatter11
To the OP, give what you can afford. If you can't afford $300 give less.
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by BargainMama
I would give what you can afford. I'm surprised people remember what others gave them. That's a good memory!
i actually wrote down what everyone gave me in a journal and still have it because a family member and a friend both suggested I do that. When friends/family members get married now, i just open up the journal and match what they gave us
I feel like this works to a point. I've been married over 10 years at this point so that information is now outdated. Plus I got married right out of college - 23/25. Most of my friends gave relatively small monetary gifts. We're now in our mid-30s so situations have drastically changed.
I was 23 and dh was 26 when we got married, and i also had the same situation. I was the first of my friends to get married and compared to dh's friends, the gifts were smaller for sure. I actually had one friend who didn't give a gift at all. Found out later that she didn't give one because she thought the bridal shower gift was the wedding gift. 
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| Posted 7/30/17 9:18 AM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Wedding gift
No true friend is going to want you to struggle so you can match their gift. Give what you can afford. If you can afford to match i'd do it, if you can't than give less. A good test is to look at how youd spend the difference. Would it go to a necessity or a "treat." A treat you can sacrifice, a necessity you shouldnt.
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| Posted 7/30/17 10:05 AM |
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Re: Wedding gift
If you can give $250-$300 without it being a hardship, I would do in that range; I do think $250 is fine though.
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| Posted 7/30/17 10:55 AM |
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Wedding gift
You give what you can afford. A friend of ours recently got married, we were both in their wedding and they were both in ours 3 years ago. They gave $500, we gave $200. To be in their wedding was literally 3x the amount t was to be in ours. Our outfits alone were over $1k. I would never ask anyone to pay what we were asked for a tux and dress. We also have a house and our twins were born 2 months prior. At the time we got married they both lived at home with next to no bills. And we were young (early 20s). Things change, circumstances are different
Message edited 7/30/2017 11:08:50 AM.
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| Posted 7/30/17 11:07 AM |
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summerBaby10
let's be nice
Member since 9/07 10208 total posts
Name:
Wifey
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Re: Wedding gift
Iif you can stretch it, $300.
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| Posted 7/30/17 2:08 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Wedding gift
I highly doubt he has records of what he gave you 8 years ago while married to someone else. You said you're close so I assume he knows dh's job situation. I would give what you can afford, $250 is fine imo. I think blindly matching what someone gave you is kind of silly.
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| Posted 7/30/17 2:28 PM |
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RayRay13
LIF Infant
Member since 7/14 155 total posts
Name:
RayRay
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Wedding gift
I really thank you all for posting. I'm sure he didn't keep track of what he gave us either. We ended up giving $300. I guess that knowing my husband's job situation he was even more touched by the fact that we gave him the $300. The next day after the wedding texted me to thank me for the generous gift. Thanks again for all of your words of wisdom!
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| Posted 7/30/17 4:11 PM |
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