Refusal to use toilet

My son is 3.5 will be 4 in July. I have been attempting to potty train him since he was about 3. He shows all the signs that he is "ready". He is dry over night, he will hide for "privacy", and then tell you he is done and needs to be changed.

I have offered rewards such as money, candy, or even a "shark" toy he wants. However, when it is time to go on the toilet he cries and says he doesnt have to go.

About a month ago I started right in the morning - put his big boy underwear on, gave him lots of liquids, made frequent trips to the bathroom, and he ended up holding his urine for almost 24 hours which at that point I was just so upset I put a pull up on him and told him to go. He did in like 2 minutes and told me he needed to be changed!

I dont know what to do. My mom said everyone will go at their own time which I believe but I want to help him be successful.

Any advice or similar situations?

Refusal to use toilet

DS 2 trained 2 months before his 4th birthday, against his will.

I took off his pull up on a Sunday and put him in a diaper. He had one accident that day, and peed in the shower that night. The next day, he went to school in underwear and had one accident. He then held it for 16 hours and eventually went in the potty.

Once he went in the potty there was no turning back... It's a battle of wills at this age but, once they realize it's ok, it's an easy process.

Can someone other than you try to persuade him? DS 1 was 3y4m when he trained (similar experience) and DH ultimately coaxed him to go.

Re: Refusal to use toilet

Sounds EXACTLY like my son. When he was 3.5 he was so stubborn. He's 5.5 now and still is, but at least potty trained. I used to tell people... yes, he will be in diapers in college.
His birthday is also in July. I had him signed up for camp and told him he can't go to camp if he's still in diapers. He was trained mid April. I remember exactly bc it was right before our cousin's Bar Mitzvah and I brought about 7 pants and pairs of underwear with us just incase. He finally did it in a few days and was potty trained for everything. Day and night. Took a while, but it will happen. Just keep doing what you're doing. I know it's frustrating.
Now at 5.5 he is stubborn with what clothes he'll wear and other things.
Good luck!

Refusal to use toilet

That is exactly how my DD was! I was so frustrated. Her bday is in July too. We tried everything and she was so stubborn. She didn't care about rewards, woke up dry every morning, but she held her pee all day. The month before her 4th bday, I told her we were picking a day and she couldn't wear pull ups anymore. She agreed and we wrote it on the calendar. It went so smoothly. I honestly don't even know why or how lol. But she did it on that day. And she has never had an accident at all.

Re: Refusal to use toilet

I feel better knowing that others have had the same struggle because literally everyone with kids the same age are potty trained.

I think just picking a day and putting it on the calendar is what I will have to do. He just holds his urine so long! It makes me nervous that something bad is going to happen.

Re: Refusal to use toilet

Refusal to use toilet

When I tried the 3 day method with dd1 she was terrified and held her pee for 12+hours and only peed in the midst of a complete and utter meltdown. In every respect, she was so ready and capable but she just refused. I gave up bc it was miserable and it still took a few days to get her over it as she was even refusing to pee in her diaper.

As soon as she turned 3 I tried again. I had the ped give her a pep talk bc she loves him lol. I also took a prek director's advice and made it a confidence issue. I built up her self confidence by talking up new things she was doing like riding the big slide at the park. I told her if she could do that she could use the potty. She said it was worth a try, sat and peed, and that was that. I was shocked!

Re: Refusal to use toilet

DS who will be 3 in May is showing the signs he's ready and i've gotten him to go on the potty a few times but now when i ask he tells me he's not a big boy yet.

DD i didn't force the issue with her we encouraged her to try the potty, etc... but she just decided on her own...one day shortly after her 3rd birthday she said she was now ready to wear underwear all the time and that was that.

Message edited 2/27/2017 2:24:55 PM.

Re: Refusal to use toilet

is he crying because hes scared? Like when you bring him in there and tell him to sit does he freak out?

That was my son...so one day we both went in the bathroom with him, pants off and my husband sat him on there. he was screaming and kicking like crazy!! we made him take deep breaths over and over until he calmed down. Then we said, see its not scary, it wont hurt you. we then waited a bit and gave him some time until he finally peed. Once he did it once and realized there was nothing to be scared of - that was that. he trained that day and never had an accident. He was definitely ready...there was no doubt...but we needed to really help him over the emotional part.

Re: Refusal to use toilet

Refusal to use toilet

We had the same issue. I just let him decide. Every morning when he got up I'd ask if he wanted to use the potty and he'd say no, so I'd say okay maybe later. Didn't make a big deal about it. Before bed, I'd ask him again and he'd say no and I'd say ok, maybe in the morning. This went on for a while and one morning he woke up and said he wanted to go on the potty and that was that. No accidents, no problems with pooping on the potty, no screaming or fits - it was just done.

Refusal to use toilet

My DS is 2 years and 10 months. He is pee trained, but is reluctant to poop on the potty. Initially, he had no problem, but now he often refuses. He has 2-3 poop accidents a week. Ugh!!!