If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Would you mind sharing why? I know money doesn't always make a happy home, so whether you grew up with money or not could you share what your parents or care givers did to esure that you grew up in a happy environment?

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I consider my childhood to be a happy one and when I reflect back on it, I think it's a culmination of lots of happy memories, from small ones to bigger ones.... Stuff like the everyday things like my mom spraying me and a friend with the garden hose while we waited for the ice cream man... to going to Disney World.

Never underestimate the beauty of memories on just an average day. It's those things that create the bigger picture.

Message edited 11/20/2016 5:22:40 PM.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I had a happy childhood. We did everything together as a family, my parents had a happy marriage, we spent time with extended family, and my parents always made a point to keep family traditions alive at the holidays and at other times of the year. I look back fondly on my younger days and I hope I am giving my own kids a happy and wonderful childhood to look back on.

Message edited 11/20/2016 5:50:12 PM.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Yes until middle school maybe (all started with parents splitting)

Before that my mom was home fulltime, we travelled, my parents didnt fight that i was aware of, i had loving extended family, parents had a large social network,
I had friends and lived in a good neighborhood

What else does a kid need?

Formative years are the most important at least thats what they say! Maybe thats why Im alright lol

Whats interesting is if you ask siblings the same question they often have different memories and perspectives

Message edited 11/20/2016 6:22:55 PM.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

My parents marriage was not always happy. Most of the memories I have of them as a couple were of them fighting. However, they put the kids first. We didn;t do big crazy things. We went on a family trip to Maryland every summer. We were encouraged to do sports, dance, activities. We didn't really have any "traditions" per se outside of holiday traditions - no set dinner time, no church etc, but we were encouraged to be our best selves. to be kind. and i think back on that now and am grateful for the opportunity to have learned kindness.

ETA - we didn't have a lot of money for extras but we didn't want for anything either. I wore hand me downs, bought things on sale, never had the newest anything. I appreciate the love and care we felt more than the stuff we had.

Message edited 11/20/2016 7:04:49 PM.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Yes it was a happy, simple childhood. There were 8 kids in my house growing up. My mom was a stay at home mom with no car as my Dad took the car to work. She get us out to school in the morning, made lunch for us - we came home from school for lunch, cooked pies and cookies in the afternoon and cooked dinner every single evening for us all. My dad helped us with our homework if needed when he got home from work.

We took one vacation a year - camping - loved it. We visited with extended family at least once a month. We had kids to play with in the neighborhood. We didn't have the best of everything but never felt it.

My mom had no help and sure there were days when she must have felt like running away but I do not remember her feeling stressed or that it was too much. I don't know how she did it!

I felt safe, loved and deeply cared for. As a child that was all I needed.

Message edited 11/20/2016 6:35:36 PM.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

We didn't have a lot of money growing up, but we were happy. We had love from our family, and I have fond memories of playing, riding bikes, swimming, etc.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Despite the fact that my father passed away when I was 7 and my brother was 4, and so money was always tight, we really had a happy childhood. My mother had to work - which was not what she expected for her life, but she always made sure we knew how much we were loved. We always had dinner together ever night, and we're very close. I give my mother so much credit for doing it all on her own and making my brother and me her priorities - always. We spent a lot of time with my aunt and cousin and I have so many great memeories of all of us together. There was always music playing and we always found something to laugh about. We also lived in a good neighborhood with a lot of wonderful neighbors and there were always kids around to pay with. I never appreciated how hard it had to have been for my mom when I was younger but when I think about it now, it amazes me how she was able to keep it all together. We're there tough times - definitely. Would I have preferred to have my dad - absolutely. But overall, when I look back, it was a good childhood.

Message edited 11/20/2016 6:50:46 PM.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

My answer is simple. I just felt loved. My parents fought a lot and eventually divorced when I was in my twenties. We weren't rich by any means but they did OK. They did a lot with us, trips to coney island acquarium, zoos, beach, bike rides, fishing, museums. We had a small vacation home we went to a few times a year. My dad coached our teams. Mom chaperoned all my class trips. She worked a very flexible and local job. We saw extended family. But all that aside I just knew I could count on them.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Interesting topic!

Grew up with no money, parents barely got the bills paid (and sometimes didn't) but somehow we had food and clothes and activities and always had our parents cheerleading us in whatever we did. Mom always went out of her way to boost us up and make us feel loved (from making sure we had our snack after coming home from school, to helping with last minute wee hour projects, to being the bulldog at parent teacher when necessary) and dad was basically backup singer to mom but drove us wherever we had to go and did the "guy" stuff, i.e. little league with my brother.

I would also factor in growing up in very tight knit community where all the neighbors knew all the kids and looked out for same. I always felt safe in our little enclave.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I grew up in a very happy home. Money was not tight at all, but we didn't spend lavishly. My parents made their kids the center of the universe. My dad worked and traveled for work, but was still the treasurer of the PTA, my mom did brownies and all PTA stuff. They had busy lives, but put us first and I feel like I never once questioned that I was loved. Now I work full time, and worry I miss out on stuff, but my son comes first and I hope he also never questions he is loved.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I had a wonderful childhood. My mom and dad were happy in their marriage. I grew up with two siblings, and we spent a lot of time together. Holidays were always fantastic, summer vacations were great. My parents had money, but lived beneath their means. They made sure we had nice things, but never over the top. They had money to help with college, but we still took out loans to cover the rest. They were the kind of parents that no matter how bad you screwed up, you could sit down and tell them what happened, and you knew they would help you. You would still get yelled at and grounded, and they wouldn't get you out of anything, but you knew they would stand by you and listen when something was wrong. To be honest, the one thing I pinpoint was the fact that every single night we ate dinner together as a family. No tv allowed, phone off the hook. Nothing allowed at the table but ourselves. It was not an option not to talk to each other. Talk about the day, fight if you have to about something, but we were 100% focused on each other for that one part of every day. It is something that I always said I would give my kids, and most days cannot. Our work schedules don't really permit it, based on how little my kids are. I hope that changes as they are older and can stay up/eat later.

For what it's worth, my father died suddenly one day with no warning when I was in my 20's. While I miss him every single day, I am forever thankful at how he and my mom defined family life for me. Make the best of your time with your families while you can.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

not a happy childhood, but i did find happiness in the dysfunction because i didn't know any better.

i can write for hours about the bad things that happened and i had to deal with. i started to list them and depressed myself. so i'll just leave it at this... there is a plethora of reasons as to why i'm screwed up in the head and have problems in relationships.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Without a doubt. Great parents, great siblings, great neigborhood friends, lots of love, not going to lie, I grew up upper middle class, so I basically wanted for nothing either.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Great friends. Still my best friends to this day

Parents and siblings were fine but when I think of my childhood,I think of memories with friends

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Mostly happy but I was a very shy kid and I look back and see that it held me back. I don't think that personality trait was related to my home life. We did not have a huge extended family but my memories include my grandparents. Also, I remember vacations being a lot of fun and they weren't necessarily fancy trips. My parents don't like to fly so we were usually in the Northeast but they picked very nice hotels. Oh and sometimes we took pet friendly trips with the dog and I loved that.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I have the happiest childhood (and adulthood!) because my parents were always super loving, supportive, and set rules and boundaries.

I was told no, I was told sometimes that they couldn't afford something which I why I couldn't have it, and I learned to appreciate that.

We did a lot together, we played outside, played games, sang songs, etc.

I am so blessed!

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

We didn't have a lot of money, but my parents made sure my sister and I had certain things - not every toy under the sun, but bicycles, dolls, games. My dad built dollhouses for both of us.
Sunday was daddy day, he took both of us out for the day. Lunch somewhere, bike rides in various parks, visiting friends. During the summer it was trips to the beach.
Whenever it was possible, there would be extended summer vacations in Germany, split between my dad''s family in Central and my mom''s in the North. That was our Disney.

It wasn't until I got older that I realized how much my parents sacrificed so that my sister and I could have a better life than they had growing up during the war in Germany.
I am thankful to both my parents for all they have done.
I still have my dad, God bless that at 81 he is still going strong. My mom I wish with all my heart was still with me. She died young at 72 and did not see me get married, but did get to see my sister''s children.

Tears are running down my face as I type this.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Absolutely. Probably because we were always close to extended family. I grew up in the same house my dad did, so my grandma and one of my aunts lived there, their whole life. My moms family was close by too, for a few years. I had one cousin across the street and one around the corner. We were all a year apart.

We summered in rockaway and my mom was off all summer... My moms family was close to us in rockaway as well.

My dad was really involved with us, school, playing, etc. He worked nights so he brought us to school and picked us up.... he made dinner.

They had a great balance of responsibility.

Im sure theres a lot more i could say.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

My mom used to be a singer, so there was always music, singing, dancing in the house. Happy, happy times.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I had a wonderful childhood. My parents were very hands on when I was younger but gave me space to learn and grow as I got older. My brother and sister are 8 and 9 years apart from me so I guess that was a little awkward, but now that we're all older, we're very close. I genuinely consider my mom, my sister, my brother, my dad to be some of my closest friends- some of the first people I'll call when I'm upset or when I'm happy. Having my daughter this year just brought us all that much closer. I also grew up surrounded by extended family- grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

Love. Laughter. Accountability. Stability. Those 4 things were the cornerstones of my childhood. It was a great childhood. My parents started off with nothing and made a nice life for themselves and us but always made us aware of where they came from and how they got to where they are.
They also focused on being happy with what you have and made sure we understood not everyone was as fortunate as us, even in our lean years.
Family time was paramount. Even if only 2 of the 4 of us were home for dinner, we sat at the table together. If someone had to work a holiday we worked around that so no one missed the festivities. Also stability. We knew who was going to be home when, what times things were and that they would always be there for us. That that was their job.
There was mutual respect yet, as kids, we knew our place and knew the consequences of stepping out of line. Maybe in the moment it wasn't so great but we learned from it. So now, as adults, we still have great relationships with each other. I really have no complaints about my childhood. Maybe 10-15 years ago I could have knit picked but now, as an adult, I understand they did everything from a place of a wing and a prayer but mostly just love.

If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

I had a mostly happy childhood. My father had a drinking problem but when he was sober which was a goood majority of my childhood it was a wonderful time. We did things as a family. Bike rides, trips to the park. Simpler things that I remember very fondly.

Re: If you consider your childhood to of been a happy one

NO. not at all.

My only happiness came from my father. He gave my life meaning and joy. We had money here and there when he was in the Navy and lost it when he left. Money had no meaning to my happiness. My happiness with him is measured by the memories of time spent together doing stupid crap.

Laying in the grass watching kites fly

Playing with fish in the Caribbean

Sneaking out and talking about science fiction under stars.

laughing uncontrollably at my brother and his first attempt to talk to a girl.

singing songs in the living room

Those were the best moments of my childhood.

Road trips to someplace new. Talking about random things of whatever.

Just spending time with him

Now I have money to take my daughter to do things together to make those memories with her.

Now that he's gone there's no trinket that doesn't reminds me of him. No tombstone could ever hold meaning that is my father. Because Memories are part of every single day of your life. The way you brush your hair, talk, laugh, walk, raise my child, eat toast. All of that is because of my father and good memories. All that I am is because of the happiness my father gave me.

So did I have a happy childhood. No (by no one's standard for reasons I won't go into) but my father made my world as happy has he could. How..? because he Loved me.

For that I am eternally grateful.