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Strawberry2468
It's summatime
Member since 3/09 4739 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I was on bed rest from 26 weeks and DH pretty much did everything. My mom would bring food and stuff and helped me by washing baby clothes and getting their room ready, etc. But other than that, no one helped. I also told DH to get a cleaning lady and he preferred to do it on his own. MIL helped with taking me to Drs apts and such and brought snacks over once. Other than that, DH and I (well DH) were on our own. I sure as helll would like some help now moreso that the babies are here.
Like Michelle said, people probably just figure you are ok on your own. If you really need help then ask or tell DH tough noogies and get a cleaning lady every once in awhile. Or maybe even hire a babysitter for a day a week or a few hrs to watch your DS?
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Posted 3/13/13 2:01 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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brownie
Baby #1 is here!
Member since 11/08 13903 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
Posted by alli3131
Posted by bella321
ETA I have to say that I'm really disappointed at some of the comments on here about my post. I have read countless venting posts, girls being overwhelmed and exhausted about their pregnancies. I've always been so impressed that LIF posters would offer advice and support in these situations. Now, I make a venting post and I get responses basically saying "don't expect other people to change their lives for you."
Honestly, not supportive nor helpful.
Sorry that you did not like people's comments.
You are allowed to feel the way you feel but I will not sugar coat advice or my opinion.
ITA...I'm still not sure what exactly you want help with? If you say specifically Mom can you help me with x, y & z and she doesn't help at all I could see it being frustrating but otherwise it's just life as usual except a bit more tiring, uncomfortable, maybe some health issues to consider etc. Unless there's something medically major going, not sure what else you need help with? I would appreciate the help after baby is born, I'm not sure why you would expect parents/ILs to help now?
Message edited 3/13/2013 3:22:06 PM.
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| Posted 3/13/13 3:20 PM |
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baby22012
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/12 870 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I'm pregnant with twins and have a 2.5 year old at home. I'm not sure if my situation is different but we lived with my parents until DS was 1.5 so my parents go through withdrawal when they don't see DS. That being said, they do offer to come over and help with DS on the weekends BUT they did this before I was pregnant. They have asked if we want to take a weekend and go away alone before the babies come which is extremely generous. During the week I'm a SAHM and everyone else works full time so I'm 100% alone.
I know how lucky I am and thank my parents all the time. I'm sure I would feel overwhelmed if I didn't have my parents helping out sometimes, but again I've gotten very used to having the help. Maybe you have to be more explicit with your family that you would like some help. Is there something specific you would like the help with? Some time without DS, alone time with DH?
If your family isn't able to step up maybe you have to tell DH that you need alone time on the weekends, you deserve it!
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| Posted 3/13/13 3:26 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name:
Keri
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
No.
DH helps only as much as he did before I was pg with #3.
I'm exhausted, taking care of 2 kids (3y and 1y) and working full time.
I'd love to have someone come over so I can take a nap or even watch the kids so I can clean in peace- but I would never ask.
Now, if someone offered- I'd be all over that like white on rice!
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| Posted 3/13/13 4:04 PM |
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windest
LIF Adult
Member since 8/10 1064 total posts
Name:
Windy
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I totally understand the way you are feeling. I actually do not speak to my parents at all (I haven't for a few years now) and so I don't get some of the additional help and attention that others get from their parents and that always makes me sad. They have never met my son and I'm sure it will be the same for my daughter.
However, I am blessed with amazing in-laws who take DS a lot on the weekends (especially now that we are moving have have packing to do) and sometimes leave dinner in our refrigerator for us - a welcome surprise! DH is pretty lazy once he comes home from work and tends to not help unless I yell at him  .
Hang in there - its tough but will get better! 
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| Posted 3/13/13 4:20 PM |
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stargazerlily
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/11 706 total posts
Name:
Lara
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Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I understand how you feel. I'm not saying I ever expect things from people, but I know that I certainly make decisions based on the needs of others. When my mom had surgery I brought over some dinners. When my friend got bad health news up in Boston, I was there the next day. I don't call it changing my life for people, I call it being there for them when they need it if I can. I can understand the disappointment you might feel if no one seems to have these intentions.
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| Posted 3/13/13 6:50 PM |
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Teachergal
We made a snowman!
Member since 1/08 3239 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I'm sorry if you felt the responses were not supportive. I'm just not sure what you mean by "help." I'm not sick, I'm pregnant. So I'm not sure why I would need help. I still work full time and take care of my house and child. I just happen to be pregnant. I'm not sure what I would need help with?
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| Posted 3/13/13 8:16 PM |
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MCD0524
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1199 total posts
Name:
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Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
I know what you mean. I expected a lot more help then I received with my family both before and after the baby was here...I think the problem for me is that I WOULD stop my life for my daughter or sister and help them. Unfortunately I have learned that just because I would, I can't expect anyone else to do it...I don't think you were asking your Mom to change her life BTW...I just think you are upset and overwhelmed and wish your Mom could help you more. I hope it gets easier for you....Try not to take anyone's comments to heart, everyone is different and feels different about things.
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| Posted 3/13/13 8:17 PM |
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bella321
Blessed!
Member since 3/09 1952 total posts
Name:
Kristy
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
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| Posted 5/8/14 2:31 PM |
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Paramount
Sweet!
Member since 7/12 4289 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
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Message edited 5/9/2014 2:16:27 PM.
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| Posted 5/9/14 10:24 AM |
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maymama
my little loves
Member since 8/08 18453 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
why bump drama from 14 montha ago?
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| Posted 5/9/14 1:06 PM |
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wakemeup
Member since 10/13 1397 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is anyone helping you out during your pregnancy?
Posted by maymama
why bump drama from 14 montha ago?
It was her own drama too 
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| Posted 5/9/14 3:58 PM |
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