When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

So here is the deal....You invite someone to your kids parties, here is a couple of the things...

1- They ask you what big ticket gift to get, you tell them in email the item and the specific color combo, they tell you after they ordered it that they picked a different color combo, because they thought it would be better. Also not a fan of clothing gifts either.

2- They ask you what they can bring to the party. You text them specifically the serveware, they show up with paperware instead and you scramble to use your silveware at the party. They ask about bringing appetizers/decorations, but they tend to arrive after all the other guests.

3- You make a gift list up, they buy something too large to fit it in your car, and give it to your kid at their house, they keep it there for months, you don't specifically ask them to bring it when they come, and they never bring it.... One of them your kid starts playing with it at their house, you multiple times ask about them bringing it to your house since it wont fit in your car, they never do.

When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

You've described someone I know. Are we related?

First .. Here's what I've learned.

If you want things done right - do it yourself. Don't give them tasks or responsibilities. You will only be aggravated.

Second - no longer give gift ideas. Just stay quiet.

This is one of those things where you're enabling their behavior without realizing it. Make your life easier.

When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

Don't ask them to bring anything to parties.
Be grateful for all gifts.

It will make life much easier.

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Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

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Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

Depends on my relationship to them. My mom does stuff like this all the time. I finally told her to stop asking if she wasn't going to listen. We haven't had that problem since.

If you can't talk to them openly about it, I would agree with others. When they ask, tell them their is no need to bring or assist with anything. Leave that task up to those you can truly rely on.

When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

I agree about doing things yourself and not relying on others


For getting the gift in a different color if it was just once I may let is slide. If its always then I may honestly consider if they got a gift receipt bc you want to exchange it - and hopefully they won't do it again

As far as bringing serveware - I think you should have been more specific. I interpret serveware and plates, cups and utensils...they opted to bring one thing and I can't say I blame them

For the gift not fitting in the car that's a tough one - I'm sure it wasn't intentional but at this point I may just figure you're not going to get it. I would ask one more time though next time they come over

Message edited 9/28/2013 12:57:49 PM.

Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

I chose other. I wouldn't have them pick anything up that you NEED for a party or something that will really throw you off if you don't get it.

As for the gifts, I would try to exchange them.

When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

As for bringing things to a party, if you know that they never pick the right thing up then why do you keep asking? Theres nothing to say to the person, that is something you need to take responsibility for because you keep asking them to bring things that you already know they will get wrong. I don't mean that rude, I just mean your setting yourself up for aggravation, why? Just don't ask them to bring thing...

Gifts- exchange it or sell it

do you have a relative that has a truck or something? see if you can borrow it or send them to the persons house if you want it THAT badly. If not just chalk it up to lesson learned and accept your not getting it for whateva reason...

Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

Jams92- they never give a gift receipt(yet I've seen them give others gift receipts). they then pick stores not nearby, that it sits for months before i exchange it for store credit(which I think you can only do a certain amount each year).

We did specifically ask for utensils,and they instead showed up with paper goods(knapkins, plates, cups)...

Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

Don't give them anything to bring, do that yourself (no offense). Tell them you have it all covered if they ask.

And as for gifts, well, clearly they have another agenda. Can't do much about that.

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When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

I would never ask someone to bring anything to a party where they bring a gift, so I wouldn't rely on someone for serveware.

About getting the wrong color - return it for the color you want.

About the gift being too big - that is odd. Once they show it to your DC, they should promptly bring it over.

I don't think you can get upset at anyone for not getting the gift you want. It's annoying when someone asks and they don't get it, but I did this for a party yesterday - when I asked the mom what he would want she said a blue light saber, but the store only had red, so I got the red and attached a gift receipt.

When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

If someone asked me what they can bring I would never tell them to bring a specific type of server ware or gift.

Message edited 9/29/2013 7:43:14 AM.

Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

I have a general rule that if it's a party where my guests are bringing gifts I never ask them to bring anything else. They ask but I always say we don't need anything . I feel guilty about people bringing g a gift and then asking them to bring beer/wine/dessert etc on top of that.

Wrong gifts I'd just exchange or let DD use it anyway. She's not picky nor am.I.

Re: When someome keeps getting you the wrong thing

You could tell them you would be happy to pick the present up for them. I am at that point with my kids for some family members.

As for the food stuff I would not depend upon them for those items.