3yr old tantrums out of nowhere!

I don't know what to do. I really need advise. Out of the blue my 3yr old (he'll be 4 the end of May) has been having these hysterical screaming fits for no reason.

So a week and a half ago he was sick with a bad cold and stuffy. Now I know he's older, but yes I still was letting him have a pacifier at night only or when he's sick. Before his bad cold he was a great sleeper. Went to bed at 7 with no issues. Kissed him goodnight, he took his paci and went to sleep.
Anyway, last week he got a cold and just didn't like his paci at all. He was congested.
This past Sunday night I put him to bed like I normally do and he started screaming. I said he can have a paci and he said no and didn't want to go to sleep. I thought maybe bc my IL's were over and he wanted to stay up. After some time of consoling and talking I left and he was ok. He did get up a few times in the night screaming. I came in and figured its bc he's used to the paci to calm him.
Anyway, last night he gave me a really hard time putting him to sleep. Screaming and crying, which he hasn't done in over a year. Finally got him to sleep and at midnight he got up screaming. He was impossible to get out of this hysteria he was in. We turned the lights on, gave him milk, etc. Anything to calm him. Took so long. Wanted me then daddy then me. Kicking and screaming, which is so not like him. Took tv to calm him and then he went to sleep on our floor. Got up a few more times crying a little then went back to sleep again. Got up really early crying, but was fine.
Come tonight he was hysterical when it was time for bath. Did not want to go in and kept yelling its not night time. He didn't want to go to sleep at all. I took his 19 month old brother out of the tub and he was screaming more to put him back in. Put the baby to sleep and DS still would not calm down. He didn't want his stuffed animal, paci, anything. Again more kicking and screaming and then yelling he doesn't like me, which he never said before until recently.
Now he's laying on DH and watching tv. I don't know what to do. Is this a phase or is there something suddenly wrong. Please help. I am crying bc I don't know how to calm him and it's been a couple of days of this out of the blue.
Sorry so long and if you're still reading.

Re: 3yr old tantrums out of nowhere!

Bump
Happened again last night. I think maybe it's him weaning off the paci himself. Ugh! I hope so and it's a short phase.

Also a new talking back and saying No.

Re: 3yr old tantrums out of nowhere!

Sean started this around 3 .......now at almost 4 he's getting better.

Has he watched anything that might have scared him? Or anything new happening at school to 'stress' him out? (I know it sounds ridiculous to say a 4 year old is stressed) Is he still napping? Maybe his bedtime is too early as he's getting older?

There was a phase when we came back from Vacation that someone had to lay w/ Sean to get him to go to sleep (this was my Mom's fault b/c she laid in bed w/ him for the week they babysat) - that lasted MONTHS until I was a zombie and a few nights of screaming his head off to break the habit.

Now every night is an attorney negotiation, but he doesn't scream - very very rarely will he have a meltdown.

Our routine is into the bath rigght after dinner and then into PJs (about 7:30) They go to sleep about 9/9:30 though -So we run around and play, then about 8:30 sit down to watch some TV and calm down, then into bed to read some books .......if he's still giving me a hard time I let him watch 15 min of TV on his iPad or practice his letters .......then the arguments are over and I put up the gate and refuse to aknowlege him anymore ........

Re: 3yr old tantrums out of nowhere!

I honestly think its him giving up the pacifier on his own and learning to soothe himself another way.
He was also recently 100 percent potty trained so lots of changes going on at once.
He's happy at school. We were just at a friend from schools bday party and he was thrilled. First time he was really on his own and didn't care if I was there. It's like he's suddenly growing up so fast.

Oh, I hear you about one small change in routine changes everything. I don't care during the day, but night is the worst. DH used to lay with him when he first moved into his bed a year ago bc he was lazy and I refused.

We are going on vacation for a week leaving Saturday so I think it may be good for him. He needs some fresh air and change from school for a bit. I think we all do.