Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

My DS will be 20 months when the baby is born. We really don't talk about it to him because I feel like he is too little right now to understand very much. I have gotten some advice on how to deal from moms of 2 but I don't have any set plans yet. Baby center had a whole bunch of articles on the topic and reading them made me cry and feel so overwhelmed! I just want to do it right!!!! Any advice????

How much do you "tell" DC#1?

What are your plans for when you are in the hospital?

Plans for when you bring the baby home?

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

My son is older then yours, so we talk about the baby in my belly alot. DS just turned 3 yesturday. We even got a book about a mother having a baby.

I'm pretty sure Stony Brook doesn't allow anyone under the age of 18 to come and visit. So he won't be able to visit me, which stinks!! My friend had her second when her first was 18 months old. She came up to visit her, and was upset and crying when she had to leave. But there was alot of family members there to get her mind of mommy and she calmed down.

Not sure about when we come home. I'm going to have DH bring the baby in, and I will walk in on my own. I plan on going straight to DS to give him a big hug and kiss. I was even thinking of bringing him a gift and telling him it's from his new baby brother. Everyone I talk too, told me to give your older DC attention first. The baby will be fine. Of course you won't always be able to do this, but I guess when you can, the older one comes first.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DS is 27 months and we have been talking about it but I dont think.he gets it. He's been able to feel the bany move and has told me a couple of times that he has a baby in his belly.

He wont be coming to visit me in the hospital unless i have a c section since i wont be gone long and the hospital is a 30 minute drive.

I purchased a present from the baby to give him and plan on having all of his grandparents there when we get home to soften the blow a bit.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

My DD is 23months and we have told her mommy is having a baby and it's growing in my belly. She won't fully 'get' it till I come home with a baby, but I think she understands.

My DH will be bringing her to meet DC#2 in the hospital. When I come home, I plan on bringing her a present from Mommy and one from her brother/sister and coming in without the baby.

After that I don't think I will have to worry, I will most likely have to ask her to hold my baby because she is OBSESSED with babies.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

ds is almost 3 - we told him from the start that there is a baby in there, that he can't jump on mommy.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DS will be 2.5 when the baby is born. I'm almost 20 weeks now. We've told DS about the baby since the beginning. He knows there's a baby in my belly, he kisses and hugs it and thinks the baby is a boy. He's only 26 months now so I'm sure a lot of this is going way over his head but he's familiar with a baby coming. I'm really not worried at all. When it gets closer to the end we'll go to the store together and buy the baby a present and I'll have him exchange gifts with his new brother or sister possibly in the hospital.

I'm having a scheduled c/s so I'm assuming everything will be fine with DH staying home with DS.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

I talk to her about the baby all the time she is very small she is 22 months but I feel that if I get her use to the idea it will be a little bit easier but I am still scared that I am flipping her world upside down

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

My dd will be 21 months when dd2 arriives. We tell her mommy has a baby in her belly. She gives my belly kisses and says baby but I doubt she actually understand there is a baby in there (she is 18 months right now).

What I am really freaking out about is the hospital stay. I have to have a repeat c-sec so I'll be gone 4 days and 3 nights . During the day dd will come to see me during the visiting hours. We live in a 2 family home with my parents so she is really use to being with them. My mom will watch her while dh is at the hospital with me. Big issue is I hold her to get her off to sleep and I feel awful about breaking her of that. She doesn't go to sleep for anyone else.

As far as taking dd home I am going to wing it really. We are going to give her a Bis Siter gift. My ped said we should stash some small toys in the house for when guests bring baby something but not dd. I plan on trying to spend as much alone time with dd as I can so she doesn't feel left out. I also am going to try have her help out with the baby so she can feel like a big girl.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DD will be just about 2 when the baby is born. She says hi baby to my belly and will kiss it, but she really has no idea what's going on...which I'm ok with. Lol. We read big sister books and talk about babies a lot. I plan on having her visit us in the hospital. She's obsessed with babies so I'm hoping it goes over well. Haha. Sadly she won't remember any of this time so I try not to stress TOO much. When I first became pg I was so stressed about changing her world, but I keep telling myself that millions of children have siblings and deal just fine. Heck I was number 4 and I think my 3 older sisters are ok with me being here.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DS will be 15 months when DS #2 is born. I tell him all the time there is a baby in my belly. He rubs my belly and says baby. Every night I read him a big brother book. I am sure he is still clueless but he loves babies when we see them.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DS will be 28 months when #2 is born.
I don't want DS to come to the hospital because I think he'll be upset when he has to leave without me. I am going to have him stay with my parents for about 5 days or so so that I can deliver the baby & then have the first 2 nights home alone with just the baby. We'll pick DS up, with a gift in hand, of course, from the baby to his big brother.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

Thanks ladies! DS is used to lots of attention so I am worried about the adjustment for him. Thinking about it all makes me cry! Hearing all your situations make me feel much better though!

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DD has BTDT (she's 4), so she knows what to expect and is excited. When we prepared her for DS, I read books to her about being a big sister and we talked about the baby a lot. We talked about what a big help she would be. She was a little over 2.5 when DS arrived.

This time, DS is going to be 21 months when DC3 arrives. I tell him that there is a baby in my belly, but he doesn't "get it". He'll be ok though. He's a second child.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DS is 22 months and is just starting to learn what a baby is- we called his blankets his babies so oops that's what he thought a baby was!
Now I try to tell him there are 2 babies in mama's belly- but he looks at me like I'm crazy, haha.
Last night we watched my 4 mth old niece and when I went to pick her up he got SO upset. Hysterically crying and on the floor. I told him we have to take care of her and to pick out a toy she would like. He picked out some colorful blocks for her and then was all smiles. But he stole her paci and bottle and that night he wanted to be held like a baby before bed. Oh boy!

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

I honestly haven't given it much thought, but now I'm wondering if I should! DS will be 2 1/2 when ds#2 is born. We've been telling him that "baby brother" is in mommy's belly & he comes over to kiss him/my belly sometimes and/or to feel his kicks. We talk a lot about how he's a big boy & how he's going to be the big brother & he seems excited, but we'll see if that changes once the baby is born. Our plan is to give him a gift from the new baby at the hospital to try & help with the transition a bit. Beyond that, I haven't really thought about how we'll handle things at home...

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

I didn't think we've been doing much, but I guess we have been! I got DS a couple of books. One all about being a big brother and the other about the "new baby." I have also taken out a couple of sibling books from the library too. I go through them and call the little boy by his name and say this is mommy, daddy and the baby.

We just transitioned him to a full-size bed (he is 20 months). When we go into the baby's room we call it that. We just ordered the furniture for the nursery so I'll be sure to bring him in there and tell him that is the baby's bed etc.

At 20 months now he still doesn't really get it. I point to my belly and say baby but he does the same to his

When in the hospital, my parents are going to stay over and take care of DS and our dog while DH stays with me until I got out. I had a C last time but am hoping to VBAC for a quicker recovery. We'll see how that goes. But my folks will bring him for a visit and his first introduction there.

When we go home, DH will be home with us for a couple of weeks while we all adjust. After that, I will be sending him to daycare part-time so I can bond with the baby and rest while he is taken care of. I honestly think it will be a harder adjustment for our pooch than DS

Try not to overthink it! I think everything will fall into place and everyone will adjust accordingly

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?

DD was 23 months when we found out. I started speaking to her about it the day after we found out. We talk about it alll the time, how she's going to be a big sister, all the things she can help me with. We talk about me being in the hospital and how she can come visit me with her daddy. I also talk to her about how the baby is going to come out. First we talked about pushing the baby out and now I tell her that the doc is going to open up my belly and i'll have a boo-boo for awhile.

Some might think it's excessive, but she's so excited and understands so much of it. I'm glad I did it the way I did.

Re: Ladies preggo with DC#2 - How are you handling your 1st DC?