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How to answer this?

Posted By Message

kristin597
Mama!

Member since 8/08

1688 total posts

Name:
Kristin

How to answer this?

So DH and I have just started (literally this month) to TTC. We have not told anyone because I just don't want that added pressure. In the last week I have had no less than 5 family members ask us when we were going to start having kids. Usually I just say "when it happens it happens" or "maybe soon". Kind of vague answers. But yesterday BIL asked me "when are you having kids, I want to be an uncle". I gave my standard response but then he asked again. I feel like my answer isnt really working anymore Chat Icon

What do/did you say if you haven't told anyone you're ttc-ing?

Posted 5/7/09 9:47 AM
 
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: How to answer this?

um, i would ask him why he is so interested in your sex life! Chat Icon

Posted 5/7/09 9:50 AM
 

neener1211
:-)

Member since 4/07

22952 total posts

Name:
J

Re: How to answer this?

Posted by headoverheels

um, i would ask him why he is so interested in your sex life! Chat Icon



you just took the words right out of my mouth.Chat Icon

Posted 5/7/09 9:53 AM
 

kristin597
Mama!

Member since 8/08

1688 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: How to answer this?

Posted by headoverheels

um, i would ask him why he is so interested in your sex life! Chat Icon



Chat Icon I know right? The only reason I don't get offended or angry with him is because he has always had awful social skills. But it seems like ever since we got married everyone is interested in my sex life Chat Icon

Posted 5/7/09 10:02 AM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

9511 total posts

Name:

Re: How to answer this?

I find that for the most part people are really well meaning when they ask these types of questions. They don't know that it can be rude or insensitive. Even my FIL who is a really nice man added something to the toast at our wedding about us getting to work on having his grandkids.

I am usually pretty honest about it and I say "we're working on it" and then people don't ask anymore details. I think at that point they realize "oops, I probably shouldn't have asked that".

Just so you know, it doesn't end after you have a child. People are constantly asking me when we will try for another......

Posted 5/7/09 10:36 AM
 

MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!

Member since 7/06

12020 total posts

Name:
MJ

Re: How to answer this?

tell them when they are ready to pay for and raise your child for you, is when you'll be ready to have kids. Chat Icon

just keep saying what you're saying and they will eventually back off. or you can just be straight forward and say "when DH and i are ready, we'll be ready and no offense, its really no one's business when that happens"

i know they mean well--but its a rude question to keep asking you.

Posted 5/7/09 10:39 AM
 

scanlj
LIF Toddler

Member since 4/09

379 total posts

Name:

Re: How to answer this?

DH & I have been married 6 years. I just graduated from school last May. And, people will not stop asking. Well, we just started to TTC this month - but I have gotten to the point where I tell people we are not having kids. Then they wont ever ask again.

Posted 5/7/09 10:48 AM
 

kristin597
Mama!

Member since 8/08

1688 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: How to answer this?

Thanks ladies! Chat Icon

I guess I am going to just keep saying what I have been saying. Since we got married and started ttc I have felt like I have a big stamp on my forehead that says "ask me about my uterus"

Posted 5/7/09 11:52 AM
 

itsbabytime
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

9644 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: How to answer this?

I always say "maybe soon" or "could be soon" or something like that. Even now that I just found out I am pg when people ask when I am going to give DS a brother or sister - same response "maybe soon" or "we will see..." or "not really sure" I'm always very vague and change the subject quick!

Posted 5/7/09 2:39 PM
 

TopSecretTTCer
LIF Infant

Member since 5/09

99 total posts

Name:

Re: How to answer this?



Message edited 5/29/2009 3:26:32 PM.

Posted 5/7/09 2:51 PM
 

kms717
St Philomena Protect My Son

Member since 2/06

2747 total posts

Name:
Kelly

Re: How to answer this?

DH and I told our families we were trying and not to ask us any more about when we are going to have kids. I felt worse everytime someone asked and we were trying, but nothing was happening. If you tell them you're trying they stop asking.

HTH

Posted 5/8/09 7:04 AM
 
 

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