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What Pets Write In Their Diaries
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9924 total posts
Name:
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What Pets Write In Their Diaries
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary......
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite
thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...
Day 983 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other
inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the
carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
Bastards.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration
of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I
overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must
learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is
regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is
obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I
observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he
reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...
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Posted 4/20/09 7:33 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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greenfreak
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Member since 9/06 11483 total posts
Name:
greenfreak
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
I love this. I say that to DH all the time, pretending I'm Brinkley talking. A walk! My favorite! A treat! My favorite! A belly rub! My favorite!
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| Posted 4/21/09 9:57 AM |
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JennyPenny
?
Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
My cats totally write that in their diaries!
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| Posted 4/21/09 10:11 AM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10314 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
I love it, the last two paragraphs are the best!!
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| Posted 4/21/09 11:44 PM |
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KimberlyScott
Graceyn=My World <3
Member since 10/08 4173 total posts
Name:
Kimberly
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
Are you implying that cats are smarter then dogs??????????????/
LOL - just kidding!
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| Posted 4/23/09 5:49 PM |
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CallaLily
Thank you, Saint Gerard!
Member since 10/07 4937 total posts
Name:
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
This always makes me laugh! Love it!
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| Posted 4/23/09 11:42 PM |
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Catzmeow
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/05 604 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: What Pets Write In Their Diaries
Love it!!!!
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| Posted 4/27/09 10:52 AM |
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