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Ali1
Mommy
Member since 8/05 3116 total posts
Name:
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X
x..thanks
Message edited 1/24/2006 4:24:10 PM.
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Posted 1/24/06 3:21 PM  |
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LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here
Member since 5/05 12023 total posts
Name:
Sonia
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
Well, if you say soemthing don't point fingers. Don't start w/ the bad qualities. Start with YOu know your kids are well rounded, smart and A...B...& C...but when it comes to their manners....and go from there. No one like to hear the negatives about their kids, but as a good parent I assure you she will take it into consideration and hopefully make a change for the better in their lives.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:24 PM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
say something! My family let my 2 beyatch cousins pull the same cr@p of not saying thank you to uncles, aunts, grandparents etc... they are now 30 plus and continue to accept gifts without "thank yous". My parents always said "we are doing it for your uncle".. Me...Im like "STOP"!
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:24 PM |
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ODonnell
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Member since 9/05 5983 total posts
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
If it was my sister's kids I would definitely say something. That's not the way we were brought up, so I would make a comment like that "gee, aren't kids spoiled rotten these days, they get everything they want and never even say thank you - our mother would have killed us if we did that".
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:24 PM |
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LI2VA
Love my life!!
Member since 11/05 3125 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
I absolutely would say something to your sister. IMO it unacceptable for children (especially that age) not to have manners. My DH nephew is like that and it drives me nuts. Good luck with what ever you decide, iknow it's a sticky situation.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:25 PM |
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baghag
:P
Member since 5/05 10278 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
i think you are close enough that you can mention it to her.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:31 PM |
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LFitzy79
can hardly wait
Member since 5/05 2650 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
my sister and I are very close-so I would have absolutely no issue telling her straight that her kids have no manners and she really needs to work on them, but some people can be very sensitive....sugar coat it if you have to, but I would definetly say something.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:32 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
For an 8 and 12 year old, I would probably address the children directly. After asking them if they like the gifts, I would say something like "well, do I get a thank you?" I think they are old enough at that age to have heard other people say please and thank you and they know what it means. If my sister weren't teaching her children manners, I am not sure me saying anything would change that.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:36 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
I would say something because it will only hurt them in the long run. Your sister should really be teaching them manners and how to be polite. She may not notice it since she is so used to her children being that way. Have you thought of saying anything to the children? I think they are old enough for you to tell them that when they are given something they should say "thank you".
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:38 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
Posted by LadyLainez
Well, if you say soemthing don't point fingers. Don't start w/ the bad qualities. Start with YOu know your kids are well rounded, smart and A...B...& C...but when it comes to their manners....and go from there. No one like to hear the negatives about their kids, but as a good parent I assure you she will take it into consideration and hopefully make a change for the better in their lives.
I think this is great advice.
I have no kids yet and my neice is 7 months- so other than spitting up on her aunt- she hasn't developed any "bad manners". But if you have an open relationship with your sister I would say something. But definitely tell her all the wonderful things about her kids first.
I would also put it more in terms of you- than blaming her kids. Like "I was disappointed that your kids didn't thank me or seem to appreciate the gift" Rather than "Your kids didn't thank me...". And say something that when your gift is not appreciated, it makes you not want to give them any more presents. I would end it by saying that you loev her kids and know they are good kids, but this is something that bothers you.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:39 PM |
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Ali1
Mommy
Member since 8/05 3116 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
Posted by dpli
For an 8 and 12 year old, I would probably address the children directly. After asking them if they like the gifts, I would say something like "well, do I get a thank you?" I think they are old enough at that age to have heard other people say please and thank you and they know what it means. If my sister weren't teaching her children manners, I am not sure me saying anything would change that.
Trust me it has been said to them again and again and they only stare at us and almost i think don't say it after that to piss us off.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:47 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
Posted by Ali1
Posted by dpli
For an 8 and 12 year old, I would probably address the children directly. After asking them if they like the gifts, I would say something like "well, do I get a thank you?" I think they are old enough at that age to have heard other people say please and thank you and they know what it means. If my sister weren't teaching her children manners, I am not sure me saying anything would change that.
Trust me it has been said to them again and again and they only stare at us and almost i think don't say it after that to piss us off.
WOW! Then I might say something to my sister then. Or I might just stop giving them gifts for a while and see what kind of reaction that gets 
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:53 PM |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: Err...family issue...please give advice.
I would have said something a while ago.
You can do it casually, don't make a big deal out of it or your sister will take it more personally. Next time you give a gift, make sure it happens in front of your sister and say "And what do we say when we receive a present?" The child will probably stare blankly at you and you reply "Thank you. That is what you say." Then smile at your sis and shrug and say something like "ah, kids today"...blah blah. If she doesn't step in and say something during the middle of this exchange, she'll get the hint. And if she doesn't there's no hope for them anyway.
I would feel comfortable enough to talk to my sister's kids this way (if I had a sister), I do it with my cousins kids and it's no big deal, and I wouldn't mind if one my cousin's did it with my kids. Please and thank you are such basic manners.
Message edited 1/24/2006 3:54:48 PM.
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| Posted 1/24/06 3:53 PM |
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