Re: A topic to make us smile

Posted by Stacey1403

What do John the Baptist & Winnie the Pooh have in common?


I laughed so hard i think i peed a little

















Their middle name

Re: A topic to make us smile

What did the Zero say to the Eight?


































Nice belt!

Re: A topic to make us smile

Not sure if this is dirty.. but it might be a little borderline..

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds Richard Simmons standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, your *** is mine."

He lost 63 pounds that day!!!

Re: A topic to make us smile

Message edited 11/16/2011 6:47:38 PM.

Re: A topic to make us smile

Why was 6 afraid of 7?













Cause 7 8 (ate) 9 !!!!!!

Message edited 1/21/2008 9:31:05 PM.

Re: A topic to make us smile

Man who stands on toilet is high on pot!

Re: A topic to make us smile

A man has a frog and says, "jump frog jump". The frog jumps.
The man cuts off one of the frogs legs and says, "jump frog jump". The frog jumps.
The man cuts off another leg and says, "jump frog jump". The frog jumps.
The man cuts off another leg and says, "jump from jump". The frog jumps.
The man cuts off the last leg and says, "jump frog jump". The frog just sits there. He says, "jump frog jump"' The frog sits there.
The man puts the frog in a jar and takes it to a scientist saying I made the most amazing discovery....when you cut off a frogs legs they go deaf.

Re: A topic to make us smile

what do you call a man on your front doorsteps with no arms and no legs?










MATT

Re: A topic to make us smile

Posted by JenG

what do you call a man on your front doorsteps with no arms and no legs?










MATT

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