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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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I was being pretty selfish (long)
DH has a son with disabilities and his brother has a son with Downs Syndrome, both of the conditions have come down through the mother, but he is very concerned about having a healthy child and has actaully been fearfull of TTC.
I was ready to TTC as soon as we went off BC (actually I was ready before the wedding) but he wanted me to go to my OBGYN for check up, find out how long we should be off BC, etc. I hate doctors and was really hoping to avoid this, then last week he picked up condoms to use until I go to the OBGYN (next week) I was starting to feel that he was pushing me off about TTC, even though he kept saying it may only be 1 cycle and he wants to do this right. We didn't ever fight over this, I'd just brood in my head.
Then last night he brought home "What to Expect When you are Expecting" It just made me realize how wonderful he is and that I have been so consumed by my immediate want for a baby that I haven't been giving his fears about having a healthy child enough weight.
He really does want this, he just wants to do it right. Funny that that is what he has been saying all along and I couldn't hear it. I think wanting a baby has made me crazy. 
TIA for letting me get that out 
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Posted 1/9/08 3:05 PM  |
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maybeamommy
Blessed beyond belief
Member since 10/07 17048 total posts
Name:
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
It's great that you're both on the same page now. It's good to acknowledge his fears and show him that they matter... and it's hard not to worry about having a child since there are SO many things that can go wrong. But hopefully you can just stay positive and keep him positive!
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| Posted 1/9/08 3:10 PM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
don't beat yourself up too much - sometimes the desire to get PG drowns out a lot of the logic in our lives! it sounds like you've got yourself a terrific DH there, and i wish you guys the best of luck!! 
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| Posted 1/9/08 3:24 PM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
Thank you, I really do feel more relaxed and positive.
I kept feeling like he wasn't ready (even though he was telling me otherwise) I was so impatient to get pregnant, that I wasn't comprehending his need to know that we are preparing as much as we can.
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| Posted 1/9/08 3:24 PM |
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diva7531
My Peanut
Member since 2/07 5199 total posts
Name:
Ryan 3 boys EDD 11/6!
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
That is very sweet of your DH and fabulous of you to recognize it.
Good Luck!
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| Posted 1/9/08 3:49 PM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
Posted by NinaLemon
Thank you, I really do feel more relaxed and positive.
I kept feeling like he wasn't ready (even though he was telling me otherwise) I was so impatient to get pregnant, that I wasn't comprehending his need to know that we are preparing as much as we can.
It's AMAZING that you both are on the same page, and as headoverheels said, it's true sometimes logic compleltey goes out the window when we first start trying....
I had my "aha" moment a few weekends ago when I saw DH around our friends kids and he was beyond amazing with them, and afterwards said I think we're OK to be parents..meaning we are financially OK...which was his biggest fear, but is his biggest fear with everything, he came from a very limited childhood and his parents gave him EVERYTHING but wants to do everything in his power to not be like that for our kids, that we can live comfortably and not have to give up anything the way his parents had to give up, or at least what he thought....
I realize that our DH's definitely carry the fear for us when it comes to these things and women do fear these things, but we, or at least I should say get consumed with the emotional side of things...
ANYWAY GOOD LUCK!!! And lots of
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| Posted 1/9/08 4:11 PM |
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twinkletoes807
Mommy's Girls! ♥
Member since 11/07 10116 total posts
Name:
Gabi
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
TTC does make us all crazy Nina. And DH knows that you want a baby more than anything... Don't beat yourself up. It's an exciting time right now. After the OB appt- got at it like rabbits!!  Good luck sweetie!
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| Posted 1/9/08 7:21 PM |
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lovemy2boys
LIF Adult
Member since 10/07 3915 total posts
Name:
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
ttc really can make you insane!
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| Posted 1/9/08 7:23 PM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: I was being pretty selfish (long)
Thanks everyone for the comments, it is really comforting and exciting to know that we are on the same page.
I think this will be the first OBGYN appt. that I have ever looked forward too 
baby dust too all! 
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| Posted 1/10/08 8:47 AM |
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