I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Because I'm not feelin better. Had baby (for SIL) via c/s on 9/30. Went back to work on 11/1

Physically I feel ok- though I think I may have a hernia by my scar (DH believes that's what it is).

The last two weeks before returning to work I was feeling blue and crying- but only when I was alone. I returned to work and thought it was better, until today.

I'm home alone w/ DS- DH is at training then will be going to work (4p-1a). All I want to do is cry. I don't want to shower. I don't want to get dressed. I dont want to leave the house.

I try to talk to DH but "scared" b/c I'm afraid he won't understand and think I'm just being emotional. Like when he was leaving for his training I said "is it to early to cry?". He laughed and said "yeah"

I am not sure what's going on. I don't know if it's PPD or what. I just want to feel better.

Not sure what I'm looking for here- but needed to "say" this. I'd you've made it this far, thanks for "listening"

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

It is never too early to cry! I am so sorry your feeling down. It is totally normal! Considering your situation I would think it would be even more than normal, but expected. I defin think your dealing w/ some PPD. It would prob be best to talk to your doctor, also find out about the pain your having. It is prob scar tissue, or a hernia, but doesn't hurt to get checked. I am 7months ppd, and still have some tugging/discomfort.
I defin think your dealing w/ some issues w/ having carried a baby for 9 months, and now not having that baby. You did an amazing thing for your SIL. I think the nature of that is defin causing you some PPD symptoms. Please don't feel like it isn't ok to cry. It defin is! I think you should tell your DH how your feeling, he will understand, and if he doesn't at least he will know, kwim? Defin speak to your doctor, you shouldn't have to feel this way. Maybe it would help to talk to someone, like a priest, or counselor. Lastly, to you for giving the most amazing gift a person could ever give.

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

It could be a number of things, but one thing that pops into my mind is the hormones are still working their way out of your system. It could also be mixed in with your feelings about the beautiful act you did for your SIL....I still think you're amazing for doing such a generous and amazing thing! Sometimes it is good to get things out, and by stating them, it may help to release it KWIM?
If it doesn't get better in a few weeks, or gets worse, I'd maybe seek a professional, just for a good outlet and resource.

But we are all here, too!!
to you.

<3

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Thank you. I'm also blue b/c I had been planningto go see SIL and baby this weekend and I "can't" b/c DS has a cold

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Awww I'm sorry you're feeling down!!!!!!!!
You really might have PPD, or just the regular old hormonal roller coaster like I had? It's only 5 weeks since the birth right???? I know I was down and weepy for at least 6 maybe more. Your 6wk checkup is coming up, you should definitely speak to your OB about your symptoms but if you feel like it's just getting worse why not call them and get to see them tomorrow?????

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

I'm sure it's totally normal. But call your OB and speak to him/her. It may be a bit more difficult for you because of your extraordinary circumstances.

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Tons and tons of hugs to you! I think its completely normal for you to feel blue, at the end of the day, you just had a baby! Are you in touch with any support groups to help you get through this at all?

Give yourself more time to heal, and give yourself more credit for what you have done!!

Feel better, maybe some retail therapy could help!

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

first, i want to say that what you did is truly beautiful!!

I just had my baby on October 3rd, and have been having periods of feeling depressed and lonely, I've been obsessively cleaning the house, anxious. This happens on and off, but i would say that within the past 2 weeks it's gotten worse. Some days i feel fine, and then others i am angry at everyone, sad and crying. it's crazy. And i think that's it's pretty normal for this to happen around this time (which is about the same time as you). Think about how our hormones are still adjusting. we were pregnant for 9 months!! that's alot of hormones! I don't know if you're still getting the post partum bleeding, but i am sometimes. That means something: your body isn't back to normal yet. What you're going through is normal. Talk to your family, your husband, give yourself time. I know personally, i am giiving myself another couple weeks, and if I still feel this way, i'm going to ask my doc for a little medication. I hope you feel better soon!

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

I definitely think it sounds like PPD. When you wrote

"All I want to do is cry. I don't want to shower. I don't want to get dressed. I dont want to leave the house. "

that was the 1st thing I thought of. You have been through a lot lately and it has required a great deal of strength from you. That, coupled with the hormonal changes that occur in the post-partum period can undountedly contribute to your emotional state now. Admitting that something is just not right is a huge step for you personally, the next step is telling what you told "us" to a professional who can help you. Contact your ob or your regular doctor for a referral for a psychologist/therapist you can talk to. And if talk therapy is not sufficient, there are other options (eg. meds).

Hope that you start to feel better soon. Also, always make sure you reach out to someone, here and and IRL.

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Jill

ugh.. I'd say HORMONES!! The next time you feel like crying, roll your eyes and say that outloud and see if you can just start laughing/shaking it off instead. It might sound funny, and most certainly, easier said than done. I've tried it through all the drugs and ups/downs I've had recently and for some reason, it works (sometimes) for me.

I'm very concerned for you re: the pain and possible hernia. Def. call your Dr. and get that checked out.

Sorry Troy has a cold too! It stinks!!! Maybe you'll get to see the and SIL next weekend.

You're an amazing person, remind yourself of that everyday. Not just b/c of what you did for SIL& BIL, but b/c of what you do everyday for your own family too.

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

J- I really think you need to talk to a Dr. And maybe go through cancelling.

I think what you did was a wonderful gift but at the same time, you were PG and the baby is not with you. You still have the hormones raging in you. You need to take care of yourself and you need help going through it. Don't try doing it alone.

This is such a beautiful thing you did but I wish people around you were more in touch with YOU and how YOU are doing as well.

Go see a Dr. Don't try to tough if out!

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Took me at least 12 weeks or so to not feel like a hormonal freak. I was way out of control..REALLY bad. I asked DH about adoption once b/c I said I was sure I was the worst Mother alive...and I was SERIOUS. Dead serious. Thank God, within a few months, everything regualted.

Just ride it out and if it becomes too much to bear, then see yoru OB , go see someone for a little while to talk or they can prescribe some anti depressants till you regulate hormonally as wll.

PLUS...You had the baby, yet dont have the baby to keep your mind off the hormonal stuff too .

Poor thing, hang in there....I swear you'll feel better soon!

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .

Call or text me if you need me, im always there for you!! xoxoxoxoxo Feel better

Re: I've wanted to post this for a few weeks, but didn't. Now feel like I should . . .