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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Just found out my mother won't be here for DC's 1st bday and she said to me "Ellie won't care" which is absolutely true, I mean she is only a year old, but I'm really disappointed. It matters to me. But maybe it shouldn't. Maybe her first bday is only a big deal to us as her parents? Just needed to talk to someone about it and DH won't be home for quite a while.
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Posted 5/7/07 4:31 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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bee
Secret Agent
Member since 8/06 1087 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
What's her reason though?
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:32 PM |
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ckdk
My girls
Member since 5/05 7027 total posts
Name:
Cheryl
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I guess it would depend on why...
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:34 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
She took a new job and she can't have any time off for the first 90 days. She's been out of work for the last several months. Ellie's bday is on Memorial Day Weekend. I understand that she can't take any time off. My understanding was that she'd come in on Fri night or Saturday and leave on Sunday or Monday. But she says none of the flights would get her in before 4pm so by the time she gets to the house it would be 6.
Message edited 5/7/2007 5:10:23 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:37 PM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Yes, DH was devestated when his parents decided not to come up for Sarah's 1st birthday. Especially when they came up the month before and the month after. 
But they are selfish pieces of crap.
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:39 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Posted by CathyB
Yes, DH was devestated when his parents decided not to come up for Sarah's 1st birthday. Especially when they came up the month before and the month after.
But they are selfish pieces of crap.
I feel especially bad b/c she hasn't been here since xmas and that was a 4 hour visit. so much has happened with Ellie during these last few months and she's missing it all. 
Message edited 5/7/2007 4:48:01 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:47 PM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Posted by cloddy
I feel especially bad b/c she hasn't been here since xmas and that was a 4 hour visit. so much has happened with Ellie during these last few months and she's missing it all.
I can understand that, but at least she has a good reason. Can you bring Ellie down there one weekend to see her?
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| Posted 5/7/07 4:58 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
It sounds like a pretty good reason to me. I would be disappointed, but understand. It really makes no difference to the child. They don't really realize what is going on at 1 year old. Jordana was just t happy to get attention from anyone.
Jordana hasn't seen MIL since she was 2 weeks old and never met FIL and one SIL. They live in another country though.
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| Posted 5/7/07 5:01 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Ok well those are not exactly the responses I was expecting so I guess I'm the one being unreasonable. I know I'll have to get over it, it's just disappointing.
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| Posted 5/7/07 7:05 PM |
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ckdk
My girls
Member since 5/05 7027 total posts
Name:
Cheryl
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I'd have to agree with everyone else, I would be disappointed but completely understand.
I'm sure your mother is just as upset about it as you are.
I would try to take Ellie to visit her soon
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| Posted 5/7/07 7:08 PM |
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BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I would be upset, but I would understand at the same time. Can you go visit her?
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| Posted 5/7/07 7:10 PM |
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MrsBumbleb
it's me
Member since 5/05 11234 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
YES! My mother booked a cruise in advance knowing it was Roman's 1st birthday. She travels ALL THE TIME so I was pizzed when she told me she couldn't (well actually wouldn't) cancel.
yours is a different situation though, I'd be more disappointed, than angry.
Message edited 5/7/2007 7:46:19 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 7:45 PM |
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groovypeg
:)
Member since 5/05 2423 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
my dad is going to miss hannah's first b-day. he has a business trip that has been planned for a year. he feels so bad, but there's nothing he can do to change it. so we will have a special party when he comes back.
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| Posted 5/7/07 7:48 PM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Message edited 5/7/2007 8:11:33 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 8:10 PM |
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-Lisa-
---------------
Member since 5/05 6530 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Is she missing the party or the actual birthday (if they're different). I wouldn't be happy about it, but it sounds like its outside of your mom's control.
If she was missing it by CHOICE, I'd be angry.
Its looks like Al may have to fly out on Ella's birthday, so he won't be around for the actual day 
Message edited 5/7/2007 8:21:08 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 8:19 PM |
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Marcie
Complete Happiness :)
Member since 5/05 27789 total posts
Name:
LOVE being a Mommy!
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I would be very upset about it
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| Posted 5/7/07 8:45 PM |
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-Laurie-
Hi!
Member since 5/05 2536 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
My parents are in NC now and we are in Florida. My Mom and Dad but only my Mom drives, drove 22 hours roundtrip on our holiday weekend of Memorial Day because she wanted to see my son smash his cake.
I considered having a somewhat Memorial Day weekend well 5/23 Birthday for my son a blessing because its a long weekend and she gets that extra Monday off for travelling.
They are doing the same this Memorial Day but decided to fly since they got a decent deal compared to having to put more miles on their car.
I'd be ****** if honestly I knew it was possible. My Mom has been on out work for a while and just recently got a new job we had to help them out on a few occasion and help by her airfare but I think the bond between a Grandson and his Maternal Grandmother is priceless.
Does she not have the time off or the money??
I have zero tolerance for people who can make it but have lame excuses. My husband would kill to be home for my son's second birthday and can't because of the war. Flying isn't easy for us either so we take the high road and just tell people well if you can but don't then please don't complain because we aren't the ones holding you back.
Message edited 5/7/2007 9:19:29 PM.
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| Posted 5/7/07 9:16 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I would be sad but not mad. It sounds like its out of her control.
Maybe you could go visit her or she could get some time off later to celebrate.
My parents were not at my DD's first birthday as they live overseas and I was not mad. They called on the day, sent gifts and I sent them favors and pics...DD didnt care and I was so wrapped up in it being her day it wouldnt have mattered if it was just me, DD and DH on the moon.
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| Posted 5/7/07 9:24 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Posted by -Laurie-
My parents are in NC now and we are in Florida. My Mom and Dad but only my Mom drives, drove 22 hours roundtrip on our holiday weekend of Memorial Day because she wanted to see my son smash his cake.
I considered having a somewhat Memorial Day weekend well 5/23 Birthday for my son a blessing because its a long weekend and she gets that extra Monday off for travelling.
They are doing the same this Memorial Day but decided to fly since they got a decent deal compared to having to put more miles on their car.
I'd be ****** if honestly I knew it was possible. My Mom has been on out work for a while and just recently got a new job we had to help them out on a few occasion and help by her airfare but I think the bond between a Grandson and his Maternal Grandmother is priceless.
Does she not have the time off or the money??
I have zero tolerance for people who can make it but have lame excuses. My husband would kill to be home for my son's second birthday and can't because of the war. Flying isn't easy for us either so we take the high road and just tell people well if you can but don't then please don't complain because we aren't the ones holding you back.
As far as whether it's the time off or the money, I don't know how to answer this. She just started a new job last week so she won't get any time off from work for 90 days, but she knew about the party well before she took the job and she doesn't have to take time off to get her that weekend. There are several Friday night flights but Saturday morning flights will be her here after the party starts. There is no money issue, her husband is retired from the airlines so they fly for free.
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| Posted 5/8/07 12:37 PM |
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preciouslove
I love my DS!!!
Member since 5/05 9340 total posts
Name:
Blank
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I'm close to my mother and MIL so I would be devastated. I'm sorry. I know the child won't care but it's important to me to have both Grandma's there.
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| Posted 5/8/07 12:42 PM |
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LInative
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 1977 total posts
Name:
Cassie
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I would be disappointed and sad, and mad if she had a choice and chose not to come. But happy that DD wouldn't know the difference...more for yourself it's disappointing.
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| Posted 5/8/07 12:45 PM |
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stickydust
Now a mommy of 2!!!
Member since 4/06 3164 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I would be dissapointed but I would understand. We haven't discussed my DD's first b-day yet (dec) but my mom is in fl and if she can come up that's great but I wouldn't expect her to come.
She shows she loves DD in many ways...
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| Posted 5/8/07 12:47 PM |
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preciouslove
I love my DS!!!
Member since 5/05 9340 total posts
Name:
Blank
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
I'd be more upset if they were missing the party...
It's the 1st birthday. Our DC's only turn 1 once and I feel that the Grandparents should be at the party for that.
Message edited 5/8/2007 12:49:38 PM.
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| Posted 5/8/07 12:48 PM |
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-Laurie-
Hi!
Member since 5/05 2536 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Posted by cloddy
Posted by -Laurie-
My parents are in NC now and we are in Florida. My Mom and Dad but only my Mom drives, drove 22 hours roundtrip on our holiday weekend of Memorial Day because she wanted to see my son smash his cake.
I considered having a somewhat Memorial Day weekend well 5/23 Birthday for my son a blessing because its a long weekend and she gets that extra Monday off for travelling.
They are doing the same this Memorial Day but decided to fly since they got a decent deal compared to having to put more miles on their car.
I'd be ****** if honestly I knew it was possible. My Mom has been on out work for a while and just recently got a new job we had to help them out on a few occasion and help by her airfare but I think the bond between a Grandson and his Maternal Grandmother is priceless.
Does she not have the time off or the money??
I have zero tolerance for people who can make it but have lame excuses. My husband would kill to be home for my son's second birthday and can't because of the war. Flying isn't easy for us either so we take the high road and just tell people well if you can but don't then please don't complain because we aren't the ones holding you back.
As far as whether it's the time off or the money, I don't know how to answer this. She just started a new job last week so she won't get any time off from work for 90 days, but she knew about the party well before she took the job and she doesn't have to take time off to get her that weekend. There are several Friday night flights but Saturday morning flights will be her here after the party starts. There is no money issue, her husband is retired from the airlines so they fly for free.
I'd be ******, also she could have mentioned to her employer that she needed an extra day off in advance.
I'm sorry.
My parents are flying in the 26th they get in mid day (she couldn't rush after work and get my Dad to the aiport to make the late friday flight plus she didn't want me at the airport alone with the baby late at night), are here all day the 27th and leave mid day on the 28th (they would love to stay later but my mom can't miss work on tuesday and she needs to make sure there are other flights if she needs a connection)
Tell your Mom to suck it up and that the baby may not need her or know she is missing it but you will. It's the anniversary of your first year of Mommyhood she should be better about it.
Message edited 5/8/2007 2:13:46 PM.
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| Posted 5/8/07 2:12 PM |
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cloddy
Holiday 2011 photo
Member since 8/05 8088 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would it matter to you if DC's grandparent missed 1st Bday?
Posted by -Lisa-
Is she missing the party or the actual birthday (if they're different). I wouldn't be happy about it, but it sounds like its outside of your mom's control.
If she was missing it by CHOICE, I'd be angry.
Its looks like Al may have to fly out on Ella's birthday, so he won't be around for the actual day
She's missing both the birthday and the party, they're only a day apart. I'm angry b/c as far as I'm concerned it is by choice b/c there are several fri night flights so if she wanted to be here she could.
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| Posted 5/8/07 2:12 PM |
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