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TiggerBounce
The Prince & Princess
Member since 7/05 4939 total posts
Name:
J
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Would it be wrong to...
house hunt NOT based on the school district?
My MIL has said she wants her grandkids (currently 2) to "live" at her house b/c of the good school district.
DH and I are JUST starting to look at houses (seeing those that are in our price range) and our first things was the school district. But after MIL's comment, should we move that priority down the list?
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Posted 11/15/07 6:31 PM  |
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lilacwine
only love...
Member since 5/05 2034 total posts
Name:
<3
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
You run the risk of being caught for stealing services from MIL's school district.
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| Posted 11/15/07 6:57 PM |
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MrsFlatbread
Skinny jeans are in my future
Member since 6/06 10258 total posts
Name:
Baby Momma
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
I agree with the stealing services part...
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| Posted 11/15/07 7:07 PM |
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sunnyplus3
:)
Member since 11/05 8749 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
no, kids need to live where they go to school for social situations. It would be a lie & at any moment your children could be uprooted from your MILs district & would need to switch to yours. I've heard some districts offer "tuition programs" for students outside the district, you'd need to get something in writing though IMO.
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| Posted 11/15/07 9:17 PM |
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beautyq115
New Year!
Member since 5/05 13729 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Also I would be afraid of reselling it...people do look at school district when buying
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| Posted 11/15/07 9:17 PM |
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PotofLuck06
Our Baby Boy Is Here!!!
Member since 11/06 13241 total posts
Name:
Betsy
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by MrsFlatbread
I agree with the stealing services part...
So do I.
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| Posted 11/15/07 9:27 PM |
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jax1023
LIF Adult
Member since 3/07 1165 total posts
Name:
Jackie
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
A serious warning on that- when my DH was in HS, his parents moved from Queens to Nassau. He kept his address at his grandparents. He's now 27 and his parents just got a bill from NYC for the tuition that should have been paid.
So that can come back to bite you later.
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| Posted 11/15/07 9:34 PM |
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gottaluvmusik
Just the 4 of us
Member since 12/06 3554 total posts
Name:
Andrea
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
I would just watch that... We did not pick our new house based on the district we just knew it was in our price range... We said that we will see how she does in elementary school and we will decide if she will stay or go to catholic school.
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| Posted 11/15/07 10:15 PM |
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TiggerBounce
The Prince & Princess
Member since 7/05 4939 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Thanks! I didn't like the ides, but DH didn't seem to mind. Guess he didn't think of the consequences.
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| Posted 11/15/07 10:35 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
You'd really do that? You'd really send your kids to a school district where they would have to lie about where they lived? You'd really steal services from a town in which you and your children don't live?
Honestly, call me naive or a goody goody, but even the thought of that it's terrible. It's just lying, cheating, and stealing.
The consequences of getting caught are huge, but so are the consequences of teaching your children that it's okay to lie, cheat, and steal. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but we ARE talking about lying, cheating, and stealing here.
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| Posted 11/16/07 8:22 AM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17795 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by KellyFG
no, kids need to live where they go to school for social situations. It would be a lie & at any moment your children could be uprooted from your MILs district & would need to switch to yours. I've heard some districts offer "tuition programs" for students outside the district, you'd need to get something in writing though IMO.
ITA!
DH has cousins that send their kids to a private school (totally legal) near where their grandmother lives - which isn't close to where they live. It's taking it's toll on everyone carting them during the week and on weekends for sports, birthday parties and play dates. It's tough on the kids because they can't just call someone and invite them over to play on a whim and, they pretty much commute two hours a day 7-days a week.
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| Posted 11/16/07 9:10 AM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Besides all of the consequences mentioned above, kids are very social after school. Everyone wants to go to each other's house to play. Most of the "neighborhood" kids in MIL's town aren't going to want/be able to drive to another town to play. All of the next door neighbors won't want to play with DC because they don't go to school with them.
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| Posted 11/16/07 9:21 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Not for nothing, but I went to private school and my friends lived all over Nassau County. My social life didn't suffer. No one was dying from "carting me all over the place" for school or social events either.
To me, that's not the issue here. The issue here is doing something that is dishonest and stealing.
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| Posted 11/16/07 9:23 AM |
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AOMom
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/06 856 total posts
Name:
j
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by Kara
Not for nothing, but I went to private school and my friends lived all over Nassau County. My social life didn't suffer. No one was dying from "carting me all over the place" for school or social events either.
To me, that's not the issue here. The issue here is doing something that is dishonest and stealing.
I agree that the main issue is definately stealing services and the risk of getting caught. However, when parents put their kids in public school they expect that their school friends will be local. DH went to Friends Academy in Nassau and lived in Suffolk...when his parents put him in the school they fully expected to be carting him all over the island for social events. Private school life is very different from public school.
Again though, that is clearly not the main issue here.
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| Posted 11/16/07 9:37 AM |
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dgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 5/07 1079 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
I went to high school in Queens. I wasn't zoned for the one I attended, but there was a program that you could apply to the school for various things, law, dance, math & science and I got in that way. My social life had nothing to do with distance at all, although maybe in Queens everything is closer together.
I will say that in elementary school the socializing was definitely focused on where you live, even in a small area.
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| Posted 11/16/07 10:24 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by Rooster
Posted by Kara
Not for nothing, but I went to private school and my friends lived all over Nassau County. My social life didn't suffer. No one was dying from "carting me all over the place" for school or social events either.
To me, that's not the issue here. The issue here is doing something that is dishonest and stealing.
I agree that the main issue is definately stealing services and the risk of getting caught. However, when parents put their kids in public school they expect that their school friends will be local. DH went to Friends Academy in Nassau and lived in Suffolk...when his parents put him in the school they fully expected to be carting him all over the island for social events. Private school life is very different from public school.
I totally agree about this, but a PP used the example of going to private school taking a toll on the family b/c the kids friends weren't local.
I'll also add that I never had a problem playing with the neighborhood kids who went to public school either. I wasn't shunned b/c we didn't go to school together.
But I agree, not the issue in this case. 
Message edited 11/16/2007 11:29:16 AM.
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| Posted 11/16/07 11:28 AM |
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TiggerBounce
The Prince & Princess
Member since 7/05 4939 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by Kara
You'd really do that? You'd really send your kids to a school district where they would have to lie about where they lived? You'd really steal services from a town in which you and your children don't live?
Honestly, call me naive or a goody goody, but even the thought of that it's terrible. It's just lying, cheating, and stealing.
The consequences of getting caught are huge, but so are the consequences of teaching your children that it's okay to lie, cheat, and steal. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but we ARE talking about lying, cheating, and stealing here.
Yikes! I get your point, but if you read my post JUST about yours, I said I was not keen on the idea, just getting others thoughts. I grew up on Long Island and you went to the school where you lived. Unlike DH, who grew up in Queens and (as a PP posted) applied to go to a school where he DIDN'T live. I was curious if anyone "does" such a thing that my MIL wants to do.
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| Posted 11/16/07 12:59 PM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17795 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by Kara
Posted by Rooster
Posted by Kara
Not for nothing, but I went to private school and my friends lived all over Nassau County. My social life didn't suffer. No one was dying from "carting me all over the place" for school or social events either.
To me, that's not the issue here. The issue here is doing something that is dishonest and stealing.
I agree that the main issue is definately stealing services and the risk of getting caught. However, when parents put their kids in public school they expect that their school friends will be local. DH went to Friends Academy in Nassau and lived in Suffolk...when his parents put him in the school they fully expected to be carting him all over the island for social events. Private school life is very different from public school.
I totally agree about this, but a PP used the example of going to private school taking a toll on the family b/c the kids friends weren't local.
I'll also add that I never had a problem playing with the neighborhood kids who went to public school either. I wasn't shunned b/c we didn't go to school together.
But I agree, not the issue in this case.
I didn't say they were shunned by the people in their area but, all of their school friends live relatively close together and they are an hour away each way. The parents are feeling it since they are the ones carting them an hour each way to do the things they want/need to do.
ETA - In this instance, it wasn't a well thought out plan by the parents when they made this decision - and they do live in an area where there are good schools, both private and public, closer to them.
Message edited 11/16/2007 1:59:46 PM.
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| Posted 11/16/07 1:58 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Ali120206 -- I was referring to GoldenRod's post where he said the neighbors wouldn't play with children who didn't go to school with them.
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| Posted 11/16/07 2:45 PM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17795 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by Kara
Ali120206 -- I was referring to GoldenRod's post where he said the neighbors wouldn't play with children who didn't go to school with them.
Sorry 
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| Posted 11/16/07 2:50 PM |
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lilacwine
only love...
Member since 5/05 2034 total posts
Name:
<3
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Message edited 11/17/2007 11:04:06 AM.
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| Posted 11/16/07 3:39 PM |
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MrsD06
LIF Toddler
Member since 9/07 478 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
not to start a big controversy here or anything but I DO think that the issue of living near classmates is something to be considered.
I grew up in this situation, not b/c we were doing anything illegal, but b/c my parents are divorced and I lived with my dad during the week and went to school where he lived and was at my mom's most weekends.
It was a pain (for my parents AND me) to have to arrange rides every single time I wanted to hang out with my friends on the weekends.
I also occasionally would miss out on things b/c I couldn't get a ride. It was hard to meet kids in my mom's area b/c I didn't go to school with them. I know this is not the same situation the OP asked about, and that it happens all the time in divorced families, but I just wanted to add this b/c it really is an important consideration, IMO.
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| Posted 11/17/07 4:23 PM |
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MrsD06
LIF Toddler
Member since 9/07 478 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
sorry..double post!
Message edited 11/17/2007 4:24:29 PM.
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| Posted 11/17/07 4:24 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
as a teacher, i think it is terribly wrong to steal services from the tax payers of the district. my district hunts those people down (it's very easy to tell who is "living" with grandma), kicks them out and makes them repay for the tuition.
house hunt for a house you love in a district you love. i know you said you're not for it, but think about the example you'd be setting for your child if you lied. plus, the other parents would not be happy when they find out you're sending your child to their school without paying taxes.
nicely tell MIL no way and go find a great house in her (or another good) district!
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| Posted 11/17/07 5:27 PM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Would it be wrong to...
Posted by ali120206
Posted by Kara
Ali120206 -- I was referring to GoldenRod's post where he said the neighbors wouldn't play with children who didn't go to school with them.
Sorry
Just speaking from where I grew up. I was very close to a school border, and even though kids were pretty close, they were in the "other" school district, so we didn't socialize with them. Also knew some kids who went to Catholic school, and we didn't play with them that much, either. Glad to hear it isn't universal, though. It was definitely something that I witnessed.
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| Posted 11/17/07 11:55 PM |
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