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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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What to do?
ok background...I have a girlfriend, whom I LOVE dearly. She has been an amazing support system to both me and my family over the past year. She organized a cleaning lady and a lawn service as wheel as meals on treatment days.
Fast forward. She's living a happy life, planning a wedding life is la de da  She's screwing around with her fiancee one night and he finds a lumo. She goes, gets it biopsied and learns it is breast cancer. BOOO Two weeks later she is getting a PET scan done and learns she has stage 4 cancer     She is in the process of getting chemo and will be for 6 months.
Ok finally got to the question part...Last night her and her Fiancee decided to get married in a very quiet parents and MOH/BM only.
She still plans on having the "big" wedding in November.
Soooo...do I give her a wedding gift now or wait until later?
Her Chemo ends about two weeks before her scheduled date and I fear that the way treatment works that she may not have the big wedding...agh
insight?
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Posted 5/16/07 9:19 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
first  that your friend recovers!!
second, I would give her a gift now since she is a close friend.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:21 PM |
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Libragal07
Loving Summer.....
Member since 8/06 6636 total posts
Name:
Samantha aka Sammy Bones
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Re: What to do?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
first that your friend recovers!!
second, I would give her a gift now since she is a close friend.
i agree and many
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:22 PM |
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Shanti
True love
Member since 6/05 12653 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
first that your friend recovers!!
second, I would give her a gift now since she is a close friend.
I agree.
for your friend.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:22 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: What to do?
Are you going to be a part of the wedding? If so, definitely give her a gift.
If not, I would give her something small and sentimental. Something that will have sentimental value, right now that's what she needs as you well know.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:22 PM |
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july06bride
I'm a mom!
Member since 5/05 3966 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: What to do?
for your friend
I would give the gift now and then if she has a big wedding eventually, I would give a smaller registry gift-or something thoughtful you come up with...but the "real" gift first
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:22 PM |
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CouponKT
Our family is complete
Member since 6/06 16494 total posts
Name:
K
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Re: What to do?
First of all - to your friend and I hope she feels & gets better quickly!
If you were so priviledged to find out the hush-hush wedding, I think it would be okay to give her a small gift now as a token, but maybe wait on a larger gift until the actual wedding.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:23 PM |
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Phyl
R.I.P. Sweet Mia ♥
Member since 5/06 28918 total posts
Name:
The Mystical Azzhorse! ™
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Re: What to do?
I'm so sorry to hear this Deb. I would give her something now.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:23 PM |
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Re: What to do?
Posted by july06bride
for your friend
I would give the gift now and then if she has a big wedding eventually, I would give a smaller registry gift-or something thoughtful you come up with...but the "real" gift first
Thats what I would do too.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:24 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: What to do?
She just got a house
she's sick
she just got married but not registered yet.
So should I go with a gift for the house
or just a check
orrrrr can someone give me an amazing and thoughtful idea?
Today we met and had lunch together near the hospital as we go to the same cancer center. I made her a box filled with all kinds of thoughtful gifts that I did/would have found helpful during my treatment. Than I thought of thoughtful gifts for DH for o ur anniversary tomorrow and I fear I have no thoughts left 
Can't think of something that is both amazing/inspirational/thoughtful all wrapped into one.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:29 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
Deb, I am so sorry. I would give the gift now since you are close friends.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:30 PM |
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Kate07
Feel better my little guy!
Member since 5/05 4476 total posts
Name:
Kate
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Re: What to do?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
first that your friend recovers!!
second, I would give her a gift now since she is a close friend.
I agree. And I am so sorry to hear about your friend.
Message edited 5/16/2007 9:33:04 PM.
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| Posted 5/16/07 9:31 PM |
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dandr10199
Grace is growing up too fast!
Member since 10/05 11561 total posts
Name:
Dina
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Re: What to do?
Posted by DebG
She just got a house
she's sick
she just got married but not registered yet.
So should I go with a gift for the house
or just a check
orrrrr can someone give me an amazing and thoughtful idea?
Today we met and had lunch together near the hospital as we go to the same cancer center. I made her a box filled with all kinds of thoughtful gifts that I did/would have found helpful during my treatment. Than I thought of thoughtful gifts for DH for o ur anniversary tomorrow and I fear I have no thoughts left
Can't think of something that is both amazing/inspirational/thoughtful all wrapped into one.
Deb -
Give her a "comforts of home" box for the hospital or during her treatments. Put in a hat box: Slippers, Robe, Pj's, Shampoo, Conditioner, toothbrush, toothpaste, scrunchies, gum, romance novels (or some kind of chick lit), Chocolates, a thoughtful card, and a check as her wedding gift. HTH
for you friend.
Message edited 5/16/2007 10:12:39 PM.
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| Posted 5/16/07 10:11 PM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: What to do?
I think a really thoughtful, sentimental gift now is perfect... I'm trying to think of the best, and most thoughtful gifts I've gotten - maybe a GC to their favorite, most romantic restaurant? Maybe GC to a really nice, romantic B&B? A spa day?
Or how about something fun - like parachuting for both of them. My brother was going to get DH and I flying lessons for our wedding, which is SO cool, but um, yeah, I'm still waiting on that one 
for your friend
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| Posted 5/16/07 10:11 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
Posted by Bxgell2
I think a really thoughtful, sentimental gift now is perfect... I'm trying to think of the best, and most thoughtful gifts I've gotten - maybe a GC to their favorite, most romantic restaurant? Maybe GC to a really nice, romantic B&B? A spa day?
Or how about something fun - like parachuting for both of them. My brother was going to get DH and I flying lessons for our wedding, which is SO cool, but um, yeah, I'm still waiting on that one
for your friend
I agree. What great ideas Beth.
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| Posted 5/16/07 10:51 PM |
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Jenziba
?
Member since 5/05 6265 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: What to do?
OMG...that's terrible...many for your friend.
I would also try to come up with some sort of token gift for their wedding now...and save the bigger gift for the bigger party.
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| Posted 5/16/07 10:56 PM |
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AimeeE2006
Time flies!
Member since 1/06 5698 total posts
Name:
Aimee
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Re: What to do?
for your friend.
I would give a gift now...
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| Posted 5/16/07 11:09 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
I would give her a gift now in celebration of their wedding rather than wait to celebrate the party.
I know seeing from seeing my best friend go through breast cancer, the wedding is the last thing on her mind. What she needs most (and it sounds like you're providing it) is support.
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| Posted 5/16/07 11:44 PM |
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MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.
Member since 5/05 26170 total posts
Name:
MrsERod™®
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Re: What to do?
Posted by july06bride
for your friend
I would give the gift now and then if she has a big wedding eventually, I would give a smaller registry gift-or something thoughtful you come up with...but the "real" gift first
i agree with this.
many prayers for your friend!
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| Posted 5/16/07 11:47 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: What to do?
Many for your friend- this disease makes me so angry that it hurts so many incredible people.
Defiantely give her the gift now- something she will remember when she recovers and has that big wedding she is planning
eta- couldn't you do something special for her like she did for you? get a chef in to prepare a romantic dinner when she needs the break? have a maid come in?
Message edited 5/16/2007 11:55:26 PM.
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| Posted 5/16/07 11:53 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: What to do?
I would definately give a gift now. I love the idea of a sentimental gift. I think cash would be odd right now.
You are a good friend
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| Posted 5/17/07 7:31 AM |
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Reese1106
Family of 4! :o)
Member since 8/06 6655 total posts
Name:
Theresa
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Re: What to do?
I would give her the gift now. for your friends recovery.
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| Posted 5/17/07 8:03 AM |
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Boobobunny
Live in the Present
Member since 5/05 3572 total posts
Name:
Dannielle
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Re: What to do?
I would give her a gift now...God Bless you both
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| Posted 5/17/07 8:07 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: What to do?
Give her the gift now. for your friend.
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| Posted 5/17/07 8:12 AM |
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jms100303
Luv my munchkins
Member since 5/05 4789 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: What to do?
WOW! I feel so sorry for your friend and I hope she recovers soon, a similiar thing happened to a friend of mine last year. I would send her something now to let her know you were thinking of her - a gift basket (maybe something for a quiet night, dinner, wine, etc) or flowers but wait till the wedding for the real gift.
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| Posted 5/17/07 8:14 AM |
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