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MrsPowers
So blessed!
Member since 11/06 10348 total posts
Name:
Ivelysse
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What do you think about this?
My friend lives in CT (about 2 hrs from me on LI) just sent us invite to her 30th birthday party. The invite was nice and sent from her (her handwriting). The party is at a restaurant and it says buffet dinner and cash bar.
Thoughts? Does anyone find this strange?
Just curious.
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Posted 1/7/08 7:01 PM  |
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Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
Name:
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Re: What do you think about this?
I am not a fan of cash bars at all.
If you want to serve alcohol - serve it. Don't make your guests pay for it. The place or the guest list should be modified to meet any budget restraints.
If that's not possible, then don't offer it as an option. If guests want a drink that badly, they will get it themselves on their own accord.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:09 PM |
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Re: What do you think about this?
It is strange. Is she religious? Anyone with issues with alcohol in her family? These are two main reasons for people doing cash bar, although I can see some people thinking it's kinda cheap too. If I wasn't planning on purchasing alcohol I probably wouldn't put it on the invite. Maybe there's some people she doesn't want there?
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:09 PM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: What do you think about this?
I am sure someone will flame me- but I would never invite people to a party and expect them to pay for anything
it's not a party then
if you can't afford to pay for the whole thing at a resturant- you can have something at your house or a smaller party
but I guess she was letting people know ahead of time so they can bring money????
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:10 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
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Re: What do you think about this?
I am not a fan of cash bars either.
I agree with Beth. Maybe she wants her guests to be prepared.
If you want drinks, then have them.
If not, simple, then don't.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:13 PM |
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MrsPowers
So blessed!
Member since 11/06 10348 total posts
Name:
Ivelysse
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
I am sure someone will flame me- but I would never invite people to a party and expect them to pay for anything
it's not a party then
if you can't afford to pay for the whole thing at a resturant- you can have something at your house or a smaller party
but I guess she was letting people know ahead of time so they can bring money????
I agree with you Beth!
I think it is odd that she is hosting her own party at a place.
She is not religious and there is no one with alcohol issues in the family.
I think it is ok to have people to your house for a party but at a restaurant and then asking people to pay part of it is silly in my opinion.
But I wanted to see what others thought.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:23 PM |
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Re: What do you think about this?
I've also known people to just send out an Evite and say "Join me for a night out to celebrate my b-day". That kind of implies that you pay for your own drinks.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:26 PM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I've also known people to just send out an Evite and say "Join me for a night out to celebrate my b-day". That kind of implies that you pay for your own drinks.
I see this as 2 totally different things
evites are not the same as mailed invitations
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:30 PM |
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igottabeme
Its peanut butter jelly time!
Member since 1/08 2340 total posts
Name:
Wouldnt you like to know! ;)
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
I am sure someone will flame me- but I would never invite people to a party and expect them to pay for anything
it's not a party then
if you can't afford to pay for the whole thing at a resturant- you can have something at your house or a smaller party
but I guess she was letting people know ahead of time so they can bring money????
i agree with this and i think its tacky to write "cash bar" on an invitation. JMO.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:32 PM |
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heidla
Me and the guys
Member since 5/05 4024 total posts
Name:
Heidi
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Re: What do you think about this?
I don't have a problem with it at all. It's not a wedding. It's a birthday party. If they are inviting me and providing food I can spring for my own beverages.
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:37 PM |
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9924 total posts
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Re: What do you think about this?
I have found that it is much more common outside of NYS to have a cash bar...dont know why....
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:43 PM |
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Domino
I have found that it is much more common outside of NYS to have a cash bar...dont know why....
I agree. I'm also not originally from Long Island (from the Hudson Valley) and will probably get flamed for saying this, but I have found that everything is in more excess here and people get more "offended" easily by things like this. Just sayin'.........
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| Posted 1/7/08 7:47 PM |
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stephaniea
LIF Adult
Member since 1/07 1280 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: What do you think about this?
I would never have a party and have people pay for their drinks.
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:18 PM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by mzsocialworker
I agree. I'm also not originally from Long Island (from the Hudson Valley) and will probably get flamed for saying this, but I have found that everything is in more excess here and people get more "offended" easily by things like this. Just sayin'.........
I really don't think "offended" is the word....
and I really don't see how paying for drinks at a party you are hosting is "excessive" - it's the normal, classy thing to do in NY- and I am so happy to be a New Yorker
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:22 PM |
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MrsPowers
So blessed!
Member since 11/06 10348 total posts
Name:
Ivelysse
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
Posted by mzsocialworker1
I've also known people to just send out an Evite and say "Join me for a night out to celebrate my b-day". That kind of implies that you pay for your own drinks.
I see this as 2 totally different things
evites are not the same as mailed invitations
again, I totally agree.
These invitations were printed up and she addressed them in fancy writing (similar to caligraphy).
And I do undertand that things outside of the LI & NYC area are different. However, I do find it strange that the party is at a restaurant and she is paying for part of it. Honestly, the cash bar is less strange to me than the her sending the invites to her own party. I think her DH should have sent them!
I would have no problem meeting someone for drinks for their birthday and paying for my share. I do that all of the time.
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:23 PM |
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
Posted by mzsocialworker
I agree. I'm also not originally from Long Island (from the Hudson Valley) and will probably get flamed for saying this, but I have found that everything is in more excess here and people get more "offended" easily by things like this. Just sayin'.........
I really don't think "offended" is the word....
and I really don't see how paying for drinks at a party you are hosting is "excessive" - it's the normal, classy thing to do in NY- and I am so happy to be a New Yorker
Well, that's good that you feel that way.........I was just commenting that things are different in different parts of the country, (hell, different parts of the state!) and from what I see of Long Island, I think some people confuse "classy" sometimes with being "different" or consider people "cheap" if they don't decide to go above and beyond. Again, just sayin'.
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:26 PM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: What do you think about this?
you really think paying for drinks at a party is going "above and beyond"????
serious?????
she got invitations printed - to me that puts the party on a certain level
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:41 PM |
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
you really think paying for drinks at a party is going "above and beyond"????
serious?????
she got invitations printed - to me that puts the party on a certain level
I'm done arguing about this because you are totally missing my point......and I never said that THIS PARTICULAR INSTANCE was going above and beyond.........just different strokes for different folks.
Message edited 1/7/2008 8:49:00 PM.
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:45 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: What do you think about this?
I don't think I ever received an invite that said "cash bar", but I honestly wouldn't have a problem with it.
ETA: If I ever had a party that I wanted to do cash bar because we couldn't afford to include it. I would. I know people would talk, call me cheap. So be it. People are going to talk regardless. That's just my honest opinion.
Message edited 1/7/2008 8:50:15 PM.
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| Posted 1/7/08 8:47 PM |
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Buttafli1277
LIF Adult
Member since 8/05 2638 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: What do you think about this?
I went to a party at a small catering hall once and it was a cash bar. I had no idea it would be, and I usually don't carry much $ with me when I go to functions at catering halls thinking that I won't need much $ for anything thinking everything would be included. My DH and I didn't like the idea of that. I feel that they should of had a bar open at all if it wasn't going to be included. I guess I just find that weird!
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| Posted 1/7/08 9:51 PM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Christine
I am not a fan of cash bars at all.
If you want to serve alcohol - serve it. Don't make your guests pay for it. The place or the guest list should be modified to meet any budget restraints.
If that's not possible, then don't offer it as an option. If guests want a drink that badly, they will get it themselves on their own accord.
I agree 100%. I had a party for DH last year and believe me, the alcohol bill was pretty high (and not even that many people drink which means the ones who do are total lushes but that's another story...)
I could never imagine having a party and expecting people to pay for their own drinks. I would either suck it up or not offer if I couldn't afford it. Which is fine too, not everyone can do an open bar but don't expect ppl to pay for their own.
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| Posted 1/7/08 10:11 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: What do you think about this?
Are cash bars common in CT? Some States have cash bars and it's not tacky according to them.
It it considered tacky if done in NY/LI from what I know.
I would personally never invite people and make them pay.
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| Posted 1/7/08 10:17 PM |
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skip123
Trying...
Member since 8/06 2759 total posts
Name:
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Re: What do you think about this?
I wouldnt throw a party without including alcohol for guests, but I also would not think anything of being invited to a party with a cash bar, people do it sometimes if there are not alot of drinkers in the crowd or just because it is simply not in their budget...
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| Posted 1/7/08 10:17 PM |
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BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by skip123
I wouldnt throw a party without including alcohol for guests, but I also would not think anything of being invited to a party with a cash bar, people do it sometimes if there are not alot of drinkers in the crowd or just because it is simply not in their budget...
Ditto.
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| Posted 1/7/08 10:21 PM |
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MrsPornStar
Partners in crime
Member since 10/05 14656 total posts
Name:
Mama
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Re: What do you think about this?
Posted by Beth1210
I am sure someone will flame me- but I would never invite people to a party and expect them to pay for anything
it's not a party then
if you can't afford to pay for the whole thing at a resturant- you can have something at your house or a smaller party
but I guess she was letting people know ahead of time so they can bring money????
I completely agree with this.
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| Posted 1/7/08 10:24 PM |
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