update-Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

UPDATE: I told her today. She wasn't angry at all. She cried a bit- she's so sad b/c she's SO connected to my children. BUT I know some people looking for a nanny and I think I found a good match for her. So glad not to be putting her out on the street!!! Thanks for all the input. Glad I told her and gave her adequate notice!
--------------------
-I gave notice and my last day is April 30. We've had our nanny for almost 1.5 years. I had planned to tell her today that I decided to be a SAHM and that my last day is April 30, but pay her through friday, May 3 (2 weeks). I was also going to offer her to help out on Fridays (one day a week) for the day for $100 to help out a little while she looks for something more full-time.

A lot of people have told me that I should never give a nanny notice- how could I leave them with the kids after she knows she is fired? How much would she care for their safety, etc? I do trust her and I do not think she'd ever harm the kids or start leaving doors open, etc, but then again, NO one thinks their nanny will do something wrong or extremely careless but obv it has happened (I keep thinking of those poor NYC kids ).

Some suggested I let her know on my last day, walk her out the door, with no notice, and give her one week extra salary, or just walk her out on Tuesday, April 30 and pay her through the week. I feel bad but I also need to think of my kids. What have you done if you let a nanny go? Also, if I do it this way then I would not be able to offer her the Friday (I DO want someone on Fridays to help out so I can run errands,, drs, etc- but I guess I could easily look for someone else).

In case it makes any difference- she is in her 50s and an immigrant from El Salvador. He English isn't amazing. I include that information, because it may not be that easy for her to find another job. She DOES have a night job cleaning some warehouse but I do know they don't have more hours for her.

WWYD and thank you for reading such a long post!

ETA: I was thinking to change my last day to Friday, April 26 b/c it's less complicated and then maybe pay her on Friday and an extra week. I just hate telling on the spot...?

Message edited 4/19/2013 8:48:32 PM.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I think it is only fair to give either 2 weeks notice or 2 weeks severance if you had her for that long and she was good with your kids.

I really doubt she would do anything different or that would hurt the possibility of you giving a reference for another job.

I would only be concerned if you were letting her go for some other bad behavior, but if she had treated your children well, I would give her the same respect as any other employee who was being let go.

I gave mine 3 weeks notice and had no issues.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I agree with the previous poster - if you aren't going to give her 2 weeks notice then I think you should pay for her for an additional 2 weeks after you let her go.

I only have a 1 day/week Nanny so it's different, but I think that if you are confident about how she takes care of your kids then I think you would be fine giving her notice. I just think the major problem is that if she happens to land a job in the first week and wants to start the next week, then you are without coverage for that last week, if that makes sense.

Do you know anyone else looking for a nanny? Maybe you can help her find her next job.

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I have been a nanny to my family for 3.5 yrs now and have a great relationship with them... I'd be pissed as hell if they just approached me the day of and told me that I wasn't coming back the next day... If you are close to her, I would let her know ahead of time so she can start looking for another position in the meantime...

I agree with pp... Even helping get the word out that she is looking for a new family would make the situation better for all

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Tell her you were laid off and give her 2 weeks severance. Do not leave her with your kids after you let her go

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I think as long as you're paying her for the 2 weeks, it doesn't matter if you let her go that day or not. In fact, it might help her in finding a new job since she'll be getting income but have free time to interview.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Message edited 4/19/2013 11:14:44 AM.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

If I was planning on asking her to help out on Fridays that would mean that I'm confident that she's mentally stable.

I'd tell her ahead of time that we decided that I should stay home starting April 30th & wanted to give her as much notice as possible. After the 30th, we will be giving her 2 weeks severance & of course, will be giving her a stellar reference. I'd also say if she would be available on Fridays, I'd love to have her but understand she may need the M-F.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

So some of you would give 2 weeks notice PLUS 2 weeks severance????? I only make so much money! I quit, to stay home, so I don't get any severance. I don't think I can do that. I never heard of that to be honest.

I do trust her, but that story of the Krims in NYC is always in my head. My guess is they trusted her too. Obv if you don't think your nanny is stable you wouldn't keep her. I just tihnk "you never know." I don't know. She LOVES my kids but again, then are my children. I want to do what is right but also I need to protect them. Now I don't for a second think she would harm them- but did Mrs. Krim?? I don't know. I never fired anyone before. I don't know how to handle this. Maybe I should just tell her today and have her work through Friday, May 3 (2 weeks) and she can help out for a few hours after the 30th and until the 3rd.

sorry for the ramble and thank you for the opinions. It's definitely helping.

ETA: We went on vacation last month and in January and gave her full pay while we were away. In December we gave her $500 xmas bonus on top of paying 1 full week salary while she went on vacation for the week. I've been very fair to her. I want to CONTINUE to be fair- but- I am also not made of money!! LOL (I get paid only when I work under my pay structure)

Message edited 4/19/2013 12:28:31 PM.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I would give the 2 weeks notice

ETA if your last day is April 30th then I would pay her for the rest of that week

Message edited 4/19/2013 12:39:26 PM.

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I'd just give two weeks sereverncem. . Too many crazy people out there

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I would let her go w/ 2 weeks pay. It's like 2 weeks notice w/o worrying about her being around the kids.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I find these responses very odd. You trust her enough to watch your kids now, but you think she'll do something harmful if you tell her you need to cut her hours to one day per week? I find nothing eyebrow raising in this scenario. Am I missing something that said she put your children in a dangerous situation? Because for the life of me, I can't see why this should be such a scary issue.

My suggestion would be to give her 2 weeks notice w/pay.

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Have you considered the possibility that if you give her 2 weeks notice she may not show up to work for those two weeks while you still need her? Not saying she would do that, but you never know. I think if it were me I would wait until my last day and then pay her an extra 2 weeks to help her out while she looks for a new job. Maybe also give her a glowing letter of recommendation, and offer her the once a week position if she's interested in doing that.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Posted by BargainMama

Posted by Kitten1929

I find these responses very odd. You trust her enough to watch your kids now, but you think she'll do something harmful if you tell her you need to cut her hours to one day per week? I find nothing eyebrow raising in this scenario. Am I missing something that said she put your children in a dangerous situation? Because for the life of me, I can't see why this should be such a scary issue.

My suggestion would be to give her 2 weeks notice w/pay.

Do you know the story of the Krim family?

I believe she asked for a raise and they said no. Look what happened You just NEVER know.

I would give her 2 weeks severance and tell her you got laid off like others have said.

Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

I'm sure the situation that happened with the Krims is the exception and not the norm when dealing with nannies.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by BargainMama

Posted by Kitten1929

I find these responses very odd. You trust her enough to watch your kids now, but you think she'll do something harmful if you tell her you need to cut her hours to one day per week? I find nothing eyebrow raising in this scenario. Am I missing something that said she put your children in a dangerous situation? Because for the life of me, I can't see why this should be such a scary issue.

My suggestion would be to give her 2 weeks notice w/pay.

Do you know the story of the Krim family?

I believe she asked for a raise and they said no. Look what happened You just NEVER know.

I would give her 2 weeks severance and tell her you got laid off like others have said.

But...what does THAT have to do with THIS?

And honestly, if you think someone will snap like that, then why employ them? I just find it so odd to go from A to Z in one fell swoop.

Message edited 4/19/2013 1:59:40 PM.

Re: Letting nanny go/being SAHM Q

You need to tell her what is going on.. It isn't fair to her to all of a sudden be out of work with no warning... It happened to me and I found out afterwards that they hired someone who would work for less money. . It was a shock to the system after working for them for 3 years to find out about a week before I was suppose to go back to work that they didn't need me..I doubt she will snap. Give her plenty of notice and severance pay and tell her that you would like to keep her for one day...