TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

When I concieved DD, it was after a misscarriage and I bought the CBE Fertility Monitor. It worked <--------- :)

A friend of mine has been TTC for 1 1/2 years now with no success and I had lent it to her after I got my BFP. She is still using it, but also seeing a fertility specialist now. So we are ready to TTC, but I obviously don't want to upset her. Last month we winged it, and I feel AF coming today, I know it will be here and I got BFN's so it didn't work. Would you keep just guessing or ask for it back? Those sticks you buy in the drugstore were never clear to me. I feel horrible asking for it back, having a healthy baby when she is still unsuccessfully trying. Any thoughts?

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

How much is it if you had to buy it again?

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

The monitor is quite pricey. I would gently let her know that you are looking to TTC and would like the monitor back, especially since she is seeing a fertility doctor now. Do you know if she's even using it still?

Message edited 9/4/2007 12:38:31 PM.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

I think I spent about $250 or so on it. I know she is still using it because she mentioned it recently and made a joke about having it for so long. I initially thought I'll just wing it and if it takes a few tries fine, but of course when you don't get the BFP it bummed me out a bit.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Being she sees a fertility dr she might not even be using it any more. I would just ask if she has been using it if she says no then ask for it back otherwise if it wasn't that expensive maybe you'll be better off buying a new one. As for winging it, it could also work. It worked for all of my boys

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

This is quite expensive indeed.

I would ask her is she is still using it and say that you are TTC and would need it back. She should understand. It will be tricky if she still uses it.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

You can trying charting your temp. It worked for me the first month. You just need an 8 dollar basal temp thermometer. Not sure if you know the website fertilityfriend.com

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

I would ask her how she's getting along with the monitor, and when she responds, gently ask for it back.

If you don't feel comfy asking for it back there's def other ways that are far less expensive.

Have you considered temping/charting instead? Only thing you would need to buy is a thermometer.

I could help you with it if you would like too

I conceived both my girls this way.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

I think you said she's still using it. I would try a little bit longer using "other methods." Maybe following a calendar more closely on a website like fertility friend? Unless you are really in a big hurry - then I guess I would try to ask for it back in a very gentle way. Personally, I'm not sure I would want her (or anyone) to know I was trying. But, I'm pretty private about that and I would be afraid of upsetting her.

Good luck! Happy BD'ing!!!

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Message edited 11/24/2007 5:35:39 PM.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

I emailed her and asked her if she was still using it, and she said yes she is, but if I need it I can have it back. So now I feel bad asking for it back. I charted and temped for many many months between my miscarriage and DD. I also bought the fertility sticks, which were never accurate for me. The only thing that worked was using the monitor. As far as temping, that probably wouldn't work because my cycles were always a little screwy, and I get up A LOT to give DD her nuk, so it probably wouldn't be accurate right? I would just have fun with DH and try try try, but...we all know how it is to have a waking baby . What to do, what to do...

ETA: I went into this thinking I'll just "let it happen" because I stressed myself out so much last year trying to make it happen and now that it looks like it didn't happen the last about 2 months, I'm a little bummed. Can I temp even though I get up literally almost 1 1/2 hours with DD? (yes, I'm bad, but she's right next door and we don't want it to go into a crying fit )

Message edited 9/4/2007 1:57:11 PM.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Personally, if she is a close friend and having TTC problems I'd consider it a gift and write it off. If she's had it 1 1/2 years she's really having an issue and I'd want to support her and help all I could. Like you said, it might be more fun for you if you kinda wing it for awhile. During that time you can put a little money aside and save for another monitor if you end up needing/wanting one or maybe she gets lucky and is blessed with a pregnancy and ends up giving it back! JMO!

Message edited 9/4/2007 2:24:54 PM.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

I would not ask for it back and I would just buy another one. I know it's pricey...but she has a lot going on, and if she gives it back to you and it works for you (but not for her) she is going to feel even worse...not because it's her fault or your fault, just because that is the nature of infertility (speaking as a BTDT IF'er).

Sorry...I would consider it gone and if you want a new one, buy a new one.

Re: TTC with #2 dilemma - seeking advice

Thanks for everyone's advice. I told her that I got my money's worth when I conceived DD after having a miscarriage and to consider it a gift. Now...my broke butt will have to save for another one