|
| Posted By |
Message |
MrsB-07
proud RELAXIVIST

Member since 11/07 2027 total posts
Name: b
|
thought this was funny!
> DOG DIARY:
> 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
> 8:15 am - A car ride to the dog run! My favorite thing!
> 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
> 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
> 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
> 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
> 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
> 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
> 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
> 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
> 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
>
>
> CAT DIARY:
> Day 983 of my captivity.
> My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
> They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are
> fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for
> the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in
> order to keep up my strength.
> The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an
> attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
> Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
> feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it
> clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
> condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
> Bastards!
> There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
> placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However,
> I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
> confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what
> this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
> Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
> tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
> this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
snitches.
> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
> seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously an idiot.
> The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with
> the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
> captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated
> cell,so he is safe.
> For now...
|
Posted 1/5/09 11:14 AM |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name: Susan
|
Re: thought this was funny!
Pretty much sums up my cats...always waiting to escape.
|
Posted 1/5/09 1:02 PM |
| |
|
JessInCA
live laugh love

Member since 8/06 5082 total posts
Name: Jess
|
Re: thought this was funny!
|
Posted 1/5/09 2:06 PM |
| |
|
Celt
~~~~~~~~~~

Member since 4/08 7758 total posts
Name: colette
|
Re: thought this was funny!
HYSTERICAL!!!!!!!!!
|
Posted 1/7/09 8:42 PM |
| |
|
Potentially Related Topics:
Currently 368648 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
|