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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Someone talk me off the roof please...
I'm having such intense anxiety attacks today. Thank God I'm working from home today or else I'd be falling apart at work. I feel so overwhelmed. I have an inspection on the house today and I feel like everything is coming down around me like a ton of bricks. I'm leaving for TX on Sunday and I have so many fears/concerns about going and leaving Amber behind. Who will take care of her like I do? Who will clean out her little ears and make her brush her teeth? Will she remember me when I come back.
I look around my house which now sits quiet and I feel such sadness and loss I know, I know, it's for the best but how can I look at the last 15 years of my life and how much I've worked for and not feel something?? The misery I feel right now is turning into a domino effect for everything else right now because one minute I'm calm, the next completely out of control. I'm snapping at everyone and withdrawing from the people closest to me. I feel like cutting John loose for no other reason but I don't want to go through this ever again. Someone tell me this is just something I have to work through and it will get better?
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Posted 7/10/07 11:01 AM  |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
EVERYTHING will be fine!!!
Of course Amber will remember you! You are the mommy! 
The house crap will work out and you STBX will soon be out of your life and you will be able to move forward!!
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| Posted 7/10/07 11:15 AM |
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Tracey
***********
Member since 5/05 6297 total posts
Name:
Tracey - brideinapril
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
First...
Everything will work itself out - how can you not look back at the last 15 years and at the things you've accomplished.
Amber will be fine - I'm sure she will miss her mommy - but I'm even more sure that you are leaving her in good hands. No one can replace what mommy does - she will absolutely remember you, thats just silly talk!
You have been thru quite alot and if you didn't have any anxiety over it now and then I would be more concerned.
I know your post was a few days ago - but I never come on to this topic for some reason. I hope you are doing better, and I can totally understand your not wanting anyone around.
John will understand if you need some alone time (I don't know him but from previous posts of yours he sounds pretty fantastic!) - sometimes you just have to regroup and take stock in what you have right now - you are moving forward - but then again its hard to not glance back every now and then and get nostalgic.
You are doing fine and you will come out of this even stronger than you already are, if that is at all possible.
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| Posted 7/12/07 11:36 AM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
Just wanted to check in and see how you are doing? I understand how you are experiencing such a range of emotions right now. Let the emotions happen and then sigh and try to let them go and move passed them.
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| Posted 7/13/07 10:51 PM |
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justthe4ofus
I hate hypocrites!!!!!
Member since 5/05 6905 total posts
Name:
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
Posted by DebG
Just wanted to check in and see how you are doing? I understand how you are experiencing such a range of emotions right now. Let the emotions happen and then sigh and try to let them go and move passed them.
Deb is right! As I told you today please use your time in Texas to clear your head and try and discover who Sharon is at this point-- You have so much going on-- the divorce, the house being sold, the weight loss, Amber, the job, John, family things and so many other changes. Please take the time to discover who Sharon is and enjoy yourself a bit. You certainly deserve it!! I know that it's a working 'vacation' but maybe at night or on the weekends you can do some Sharon pampering and reflection!! You are a WONDERFULY person, a GREAT mother and an Amazing friend, I hope that you will take the time to look in side yourself, realize that you are special and wonderful and deserve nothing less than the best!
I am only a phone call away
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| Posted 7/14/07 12:48 AM |
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Little-J-Mommy
I'm a Big Brother
Member since 5/06 8041 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
ITA agree with the ladies above!!! Give yourself a break and learn to re-discover yourself. I'm hoping this message finds you in much better spirits and that you're truly enjoying your time in Texas and pampering yourself as you so deserve it!!!!
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| Posted 7/15/07 10:16 AM |
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aliciahelene
LIF Infant
Member since 8/05 180 total posts
Name:
Alicia
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
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| Posted 7/16/07 4:59 PM |
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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Re: Someone talk me off the roof please...
Hi guys. Thanks for the hugs and stuff. It's really beautiful here and I miss my baby like crazy, but I'm discovering myself and how independant I can truly be. Even though it's one day, I feel like I'm making a positive contribution to the work environment and that I'm growing professionallly. It'll all work itself out. I mentioned on the relationship board that I broke up with John but we've been talking and he's agreed to give me my space. I really do love him so I want things to work, they just need to be on my terms right now. While I've been gone, STBX has been clearing things out and basically cleaned the entire attic out. He's also secured some buyers for the furniture so it's a few less things I have to worry about. I guess it will all come together; at least I can hope so. I'm hoping this time away (although my heart is shredded from the loss of Amber) will help heal some other aspects of me.
Thanks again
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| Posted 7/16/07 6:49 PM |
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