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So Upset

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MissExtremist
LIF Infant

Member since 7/10

231 total posts

Name:

So Upset

Found out today that my OB is leaving today for vacation until April 1st. Im due April 5th but told that it looks that Im most likely going to go before 40 weeks . The most upsetting part is Im VBA2C and it was SO HARD nearly impossible to find a proven supportive OB and now I am just going to be handed over to some random Dr. at the hospital who chances are wont be supportive of my VBAC attempt nevermind a VBA2C which will make for a very tense ,stressful and upsetting time while I am in labor. I been crying all day because I just feel so screwed. I really dont think I will last much longer with the way I been contracting more and more. Now Im glad I found out today I still have not dilated but was told I am thinning out and the baby is extremely low so the nurse covering my OB joked when I do dilate it will go really fast and that he will practically fly outta because I wont need to push much . I used to be so be terrified of going overdue and now I have severe anxiety about the baby coming before 40 weeks. I been contracting more and more so I just honestly cant imagine making it past March. All I can think of doing is laboring in the parking lot when it gets bad enough and not go into the hospital until I feel like Im close to pushing. I feel like once I walk into that hospital especially with no supportive VBA2C OB, It will be like a ticking time bomb- even If i was progressing i think they will still try to pressure me into a c-section. Im soooo overwhelmed and upset, I refused to be bullied , I get tricked 2 times but I wont a 3rd time . I just dont know how I am NOT going to be insanely stressed out for the next 12 daysChat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 7:05 PM
 
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cantbelieveit
Love these kids!

Member since 10/05

4708 total posts

Name:
Tammy

Re: So Upset

When is your OB leaving?
Sorry you have to go through this, I would be upset at my OB going on vacation around my due date no matter what type of birth, although everyone deserves a vacation.
Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 8:02 PM
 

MissExtremist
LIF Infant

Member since 7/10

231 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

He left today, he was walking out when I was there and was told by the NP during my exam. My 2 prior births were really traumatizing so it takes alot for me to trust a Dr. and we felt really comfortable & confident with him so now everything is so unpredictable. There's very little chance of this going smoothly if he is not there.

Posted 3/20/13 9:01 PM
 

brownie
Baby #1 is here!

Member since 11/08

13903 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

Can you switch at this point? Or hire doulas? I had a friend who hired doulas at 36 weeks and they were a big part of her able to have her VBAC?

Posted 3/20/13 9:05 PM
 

MissExtremist
LIF Infant

Member since 7/10

231 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

I tried that last time when I found out my midwife was a nutjob but i tried to hire a homebirth midwife but they wanted 7 grand upfront so yeah....no chance of that. They say " Oh MAYBE your insurance might reimburse you after" but it's basicly not covered insurance wise. Even doulas are very expensive and not affordable for us at the moment. I think if my husband sees me in pain he is not going to have alot of will power to advocate for me ( which he has admitted to when I asked him ) even though he is as passionate about VBAC as me so I just feel like I will be doing this on my own and that people will take advantage when im in physically weak state. I have no woman friends & family who are supportive to be there for me so it's just going to be alot of pressure Ill be burden with on my own. I should not have to be fighting with people when I am trying to labor, if anything the stress will stall my labor which I know from my last experience when my midwife handed me over to random Dr.s at NUMC so I REALLY was trying to avoid that this time.

Posted 3/20/13 9:24 PM
 

MaPetiteLoutre
LIF Adult

Member since 11/12

1088 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

I dont know where you're at but... I know Stony Brook midwives have a really high success rate with VBACs?

Posted 3/20/13 9:33 PM
 

brownie
Baby #1 is here!

Member since 11/08

13903 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

Posted by MissExtremist

I tried that last time when I found out my midwife was a nutjob but i tried to hire a homebirth midwife but they wanted 7 grand upfront so yeah....no chance of that. They say " Oh MAYBE your insurance might reimburse you after" but it's basicly not covered insurance wise. Even doulas are very expensive and not affordable for us at the moment. I think if my husband sees me in pain he is not going to have alot of will power to advocate for me ( which he has admitted to when I asked him ) even though he is as passionate about VBAC as me so I just feel like I will be doing this on my own and that people will take advantage when im in physically weak state. I have no woman friends & family who are supportive to be there for me so it's just going to be alot of pressure Ill be burden with on my own. I should not have to be fighting with people when I am trying to labor, if anything the stress will stall my labor which I know from my last experience when my midwife handed me over to random Dr.s at NUMC so I REALLY was trying to avoid that this time.



Contact your local ICAN group if you can...they might be able to help you! Some doulas (ours do this but I'm upstate) work on a sliding scale...please try and get a team in place IF you can, it will relieve your stress a bit. FM me if you want Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 9:42 PM
 

VikingChick
LIF Adult

Member since 5/11

1024 total posts

Name:
Anna

So Upset

I second the call for a supportive doula, and ICAN sounds like a great place to find one. Or maybe can you switch practitioners? I delivered with Melanie Summersille and she was fantastic. Also, if she for some reason cannot deliver you, she does not send you to a random hospital doc, but one of the ones she works with- I forget their names (bc I never saw them).
THe only other thing I can say is that I sort of "asked" baby and my body to wait to deliver my DS#2-- I was due 9/23, and I was in my cousin's wedding on 9/24. I was determined to make it to the wedding, and I wound up delivering on 9/27. Maybe you can "ask" baby and your body to hold on till the doc gets back!
GL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted 3/21/13 9:44 AM
 

MissExtremist
LIF Infant

Member since 7/10

231 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset

Thanks ladies. Im in the local ICAN group on FB and honestly it hasnt been very infomative & the group is not active. I really love my Dr and dont wanna switch in case I am able to make it past April 1st so it's a bit of a pickle. All I can think of doing is practically going on bedrest in hopes of not stirring anything up until he gets back.

Posted 3/21/13 11:26 AM
 
 

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