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So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

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Momx100

So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

This girl I don't especially like (did not even invite her to my wedding) calls me out of the blue. I haven't spoken to her for like 5 yrs or so. I tell her that I got married 2 yrs ago and am 8 months pregnant. Then she tells me that she recently had an abortion at 6 months. At first I thought she just used a poor choice of words or that perhaps something was medically wrong and felt sympathy for her. Then she told me how she was unwed. She said it so casually and moved on to ask if I wanted to hang out. I am sooooooooooooo bothered by this. I feel like she is such a murderer. At 6 months, I already knew the sex of my baby and could feel him moving around my belly. I thought you couldn't abort a baby that far along. Poor baby. Chat Icon

Posted 2/24/09 3:26 PM
 
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monkeybride
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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.

Posted 2/24/09 3:28 PM
 

BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!

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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

I didn't think you could have one at 6 months. I know NYS is that you can terminate a pregnancy for medical reasons up to 23 weeks and 6 days. After 24 weeks there's nothing they can do.
That's so horribleChat Icon

Posted 2/24/09 3:29 PM
 

bellaluna
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Jess

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.




ITA , she sounds a little off there

Posted 2/24/09 3:30 PM
 

Bridex100
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Momx100

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.



I actually said I thought you can't get an abortion that far along and she said it is just more expensive. I couldn't believe my ears.

I hope I heard wrong or there was some sort of miscommunication. MAYBE she said she had an abortion 6 months ago. I really don't think I heard wrong though.

I have no desire to meet up with her.

Posted 2/24/09 3:33 PM
 

nrthshgrl
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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by bellaluna

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.




ITA , she sounds a little off there



I agree. Maybe she meant 6 weeks? She would have to go out of state to get one & from what I've read it's a several day procedure.

Posted 2/24/09 3:41 PM
 

JennyPenny
?

Member since 1/08

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Jen

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.



I have to agree.

Posted 2/24/09 3:41 PM
 

sometimesmommy
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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

She probably isnt lying. Hopefully you heard wrong but since its the pregnancy board I wont go into detail but yes there are doctors out there who do perform such procedures and are very creative in justifying it. (It was a term paper in college and to this day I wish I never chose the subject as a topic)

Message edited 2/24/2009 3:44:58 PM.

Posted 2/24/09 3:43 PM
 

Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

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Momx100

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by bellaluna

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.




ITA , she sounds a little off there



I agree. Maybe she meant 6 weeks? She would have to go out of state to get one & from what I've read it's a several day procedure.



She doesn't live in NY, which is one of the reasons I lost touch with her. I know she has bounced around all over the country.

Posted 2/24/09 3:44 PM
 

MrsF-2006
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Maria

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Maybe she was rounding up - I know you can definitely get one at a little more than 5 months.

If you are at all against this then I feel you should know about the following: http://www.lifenews.com/nat4359.html

The Freedom of Choice Act removes any State imposed limitations and forces hospitals to perform abortions which removes there right to choose.

I know there are petitions going around...just wanted to inform. I know I'm signing them.

Posted 2/24/09 3:44 PM
 

donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.

Member since 7/07

7650 total posts

Name:
K

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

i am so so so so sorry your "friend" said this to you. what an insensitive and cruel thing to say considering you are pregnant.

Posted by BeachMom

I didn't think you could have one at 6 months. I know NYS is that you can terminate a pregnancy for medical reasons up to 23 weeks and 6 days. After 24 weeks there's nothing they can do.
That's so horribleChat Icon



23 weeks and 6 days is essentially a 6 month old fetus. in NYS this is LEGAL people!!! don't be deceived and think it's not. there is also a lot of other states that allow it up until the end... and also allow partial-birth abortions?

check this site out:

www.fightfoca.comChat Icon

ETA: also, in hindsight, i know i jumped on my pro-life wagon, but perhaps she had a medical issue that caused her to have to have a late-term abortion? Also, somtimes peopel miscarry or the baby is stillborn and they call it an abortion. maybe her choice of words weren't the best and she was looking for support?

Message edited 2/24/2009 3:53:34 PM.

Posted 2/24/09 3:48 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by MrsF-2006

Maybe she was rounding up - I know you can definitely get one at a little more than 5 months.

If you are at all against this then I feel you should know about the following: http://www.lifenews.com/nat4359.html

The Freedom of Choice Act removes any State imposed limitations and forces hospitals to perform abortions which removes there right to choose.

I know there are petitions going around...just wanted to inform. I know I'm signing them.



I aplogize in advance for the hijack - particularly because it's not a topic I would normally ever consider bringing on to a pregnancy board.

Since it's something I feel very strongly about, I wanted to put out on old post on it (warning - it deals with 3rd trimester abortions & a very sensitive topic):
http://www.lifamilies.com/chat/topic.aspx?&P=1&ID=59601

Posted 2/24/09 3:49 PM
 

BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!

Member since 11/08

8346 total posts

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Kristie

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by bellaluna

Posted by monkeybride

Sorry but I find that hard to believe. I think she is giving you misinformation.
Unless there was a risk to the baby or mom I don't think there are doctors that would abort a 24 week fetus. Maybe she wasn't actually 6 months pregnant.




ITA , she sounds a little off there



I agree. Maybe she meant 6 weeks? She would have to go out of state to get one & from what I've read it's a several day procedure.



Yeah, hopefully you heard wrong. I had a friend who had a medically induced termination at 23 weeks due to genetic defects and the child would have been born brain dead. And for that they had to put her in the hospital and induce her into labor. It's horrible because not only do you have to go through all of the pains of labor but you don't have a child there to show you why it was all worth it.

Posted 2/24/09 3:54 PM
 

donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.

Member since 7/07

7650 total posts

Name:
K

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by BeachMom

Yeah, hopefully you heard wrong. I had a friend who had a medically induced termination at 23 weeks due to genetic defects and the child would have been born brain dead. And for that they had to put her in the hospital and induce her into labor. It's horrible because not only do you have to go through all of the pains of labor but you don't have a child there to show you why it was all worth it.



OMG... how tragic! Chat Icon

Posted 2/24/09 3:58 PM
 

BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!

Member since 11/08

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Name:
Kristie

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by donegal419

Posted by BeachMom

Yeah, hopefully you heard wrong. I had a friend who had a medically induced termination at 23 weeks due to genetic defects and the child would have been born brain dead. And for that they had to put her in the hospital and induce her into labor. It's horrible because not only do you have to go through all of the pains of labor but you don't have a child there to show you why it was all worth it.



OMG... how tragic! Chat Icon



Yeah it would not be something I would want to wish on my worst enemy much less my best friend. Not only to have to make the decision to do it, but to have to do through the difficulty of labor. Her child was 1 1/2 lbs. I can't see any one having an abortion this late in the game and not actually going through the labor.

Posted 2/24/09 4:01 PM
 

bellaluna
Baby come on out!

Member since 11/08

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Jess

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone

Posted 2/24/09 4:06 PM
 

donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.

Member since 7/07

7650 total posts

Name:
K

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



that's why i think maybe it was medically necessary? the baby was stillborn? or there were other serious complications? i mean, granted, I am very pro-life and wouldn't do it on Day 1, but i would think it would be very hard for most people to admit that unless there is more to the story like a medical complication.

Posted 2/24/09 4:08 PM
 

bellaluna
Baby come on out!

Member since 11/08

1934 total posts

Name:
Jess

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by donegal419

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



that's why i think maybe it was medically necessary? the baby was stillborn? or there were other serious complications? i mean, granted, I am very pro-life and wouldn't do it on Day 1, but i would think it would be very hard for most people to admit that unless there is more to the story like a medical complication.



I hope it was , because as liberal as I am this does not sit well with me. I have friend who had one at 14 weeks and I said to her ***** , why did she wait SO long???? If that's what you want to do why wouldn't you do it ASAP? why wait ?

It's hard not to judge something like this

Message edited 2/24/2009 4:18:47 PM.

Posted 2/24/09 4:18 PM
 

LoveMySMT09
<3mySMT.AJT

Member since 1/09

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VT

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Chat Icon poor lil babe

Posted 2/24/09 4:19 PM
 

lucyloo
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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

I can't understand why someone would wait that long without a medical reason.

Posted 2/24/09 4:27 PM
 

Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

Name:
Momx100

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



That is the thing. She said it so casually. I think that is what is so disturbing about the whole conversation. It isn't like we are super close or anything. I haven't spoken to the girl in over 5 yrs.

Posted 2/24/09 4:34 PM
 

neener1211
:-)

Member since 4/07

22952 total posts

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J

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by donegal419

Posted by BeachMom

Yeah, hopefully you heard wrong. I had a friend who had a medically induced termination at 23 weeks due to genetic defects and the child would have been born brain dead. And for that they had to put her in the hospital and induce her into labor. It's horrible because not only do you have to go through all of the pains of labor but you don't have a child there to show you why it was all worth it.



OMG... how tragic! Chat Icon



Yes, you have to be put in the hospital for this. I know from my own experience.

I think she might have been lying, I cannot see any doctor just giving her an abortion that far along without a reason. I'm sure there are ones, but from what is said about this girl, I can't see a doctor thinking it would be a 'normal' thing.

Posted 2/24/09 4:40 PM
 

bellaluna
Baby come on out!

Member since 11/08

1934 total posts

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Jess

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by Bridex100

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



That is the thing. She said it so casually. I think that is what is so disturbing about the whole conversation. It isn't like we are super close or anything. I haven't spoken to the girl in over 5 yrs.



The fact that she was casual about it makes me think that she has mental problems. How can anyone be casual about something like that? I know a few people who have had them for various reasons an not one of them was casual about it , in fact it was heartbreaking for them and a hard decision to make.

Posted 2/24/09 4:41 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

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Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by Bridex100

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



That is the thing. She said it so casually. I think that is what is so disturbing about the whole conversation. It isn't like we are super close or anything. I haven't spoken to the girl in over 5 yrs.



I think that's enough to want to distance yourself. Anyone who you haven't seen in 5 years, who blurts out they had an abortion after you tell them you're pregnant has a screw loose.

Posted 2/24/09 4:41 PM
 

LoveMySMT09
<3mySMT.AJT

Member since 1/09

2623 total posts

Name:
VT

Re: So disturbed - an old gf just called and told me she had an abortion at 6 months

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by Bridex100

Posted by bellaluna

The fact that she waited so long to have an abortion is the worst part of it all if it is true. I am pro -choice , but at 6 months is rather extreme. I would be so Chat Icon I would take that to the grave before I would ever say that out loud to anyone



That is the thing. She said it so casually. I think that is what is so disturbing about the whole conversation. It isn't like we are super close or anything. I haven't spoken to the girl in over 5 yrs.



I think that's enough to want to distance yourself. Anyone who you haven't seen in 5 years, who blurts out they had an abortion after you tell them you're pregnant has a screw loose.



a lot more than a screw is loose in that woman's head - not that im judging (sarcasm) Chat Icon

Posted 2/24/09 4:42 PM
 
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