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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: Settle an argument...
Posted by Christine
Do you visit them or are you planning a trip to visit them? I can see working a visit around the birthday party so you can be there. But I think it's weird to send an actual invite to a 3rd birthday party when there's little or no chance of you going.
no, we're not planning on visiting anytime soon.
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Posted 6/4/07 2:54 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: Settle an argument...
Posted by Kate
I used to think it was tacky - just looking for a gift - until one of my aunts, who lives in Florida, was offended that she was not invited to my SIL's baby shower. (Which was a small affair for a 2nd baby, btw) Now I say include everyone. They can send a gift if they want to.
yea but a shower is different IMO. a b-day is just a b-day. JMHO
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| Posted 6/4/07 2:55 PM |
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Hi-Fi55
12 years...wow....
Member since 2/06 2984 total posts
Name:
Dianne
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Re: Settle an argument...
Posted by evenedan
Who knows their reasons, maybe they just want you to be in the loop and feel included, maybe they just want a gift...
I personally would not be comfortable sending a birthday invite to someone OOS, for fear of it looking like I'm greedy for a gift. Weddings and other "once in a lifetime" type of events are a different story.
I agree
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| Posted 6/4/07 2:55 PM |
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Summer05
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 2320 total posts
Name:
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Re: Settle an argument...
I think it seems like they are just looking for a gift.
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| Posted 6/4/07 3:28 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Settle an argument...
It honestly wouldn't have bothered me at all. I wouldn't think one way or the other about it. I'd call to thank them for inviting us and to RSVP. If I felt we were close enough, I'd send a gift. If we weren't, I wouldn't send a gift.
I wouldn't really get upset about it. They could just as easily want to make sure they are including everyone (it's their first child, right?) as they could be fishing for presents... but I'd give them the benefit of the doubt.
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| Posted 6/4/07 3:36 PM |
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leighdvm
My golden boys!
Member since 3/06 4419 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: Settle an argument...
Posted by Hi-Fi55
Posted by evenedan
Who knows their reasons, maybe they just want you to be in the loop and feel included, maybe they just want a gift...
I personally would not be comfortable sending a birthday invite to someone OOS, for fear of it looking like I'm greedy for a gift. Weddings and other "once in a lifetime" type of events are a different story.
I agree
I agree, also
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| Posted 6/4/07 3:47 PM |
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munchkinbugs
My little loves!
Member since 1/06 8093 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Settle an argument...
I think if they are close, they probably just want to include you. I don't think they are looking for a gift. Besides, if you're that close wouldn't you buy a gift anyway??? I would.
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| Posted 6/4/07 3:57 PM |
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nyteacher13
Three Under Four!!! :-)
Member since 8/06 6405 total posts
Name:
~ THERESA ~
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Re: Settle an argument...
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
over the weekend we got an invite to DH's cousin's daughters 2nd b-day party. it's in Ohio, obviously we can't go. we got an invite to her 1st b-day party last year as well.
I don't think that its "tacky", but I think it's a little silly. it's like saying "we know you can't come, but please send a gift". 
DH thinks it is totally appropriate. I have never received invites from my OOS cousins when their kids had parties.
thoughts?
I don't think it's tacky. I think they just want to be sure you're included. If it were me, I'd be pi$$ed if I weren't invited. You could send a card, but I don't think you need to send a gift if you don't want to. It's not like a 1st birthday party, nor is it an engagement/wedding.
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| Posted 6/4/07 4:05 PM |
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KateDevine
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Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
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Re: Settle an argument...
Ok, in MY family it would be seen as looking for a gift and it would never be done.
In DH's family it would be seen as a reminder to send a gift and they would get annoyed if they didn't get the invite.
For my bridal shower, DH's aunts (who live in Florida, Georgia and California) were VERY insulted they weren't invited, so my SIL made a point to tell my mom and sister to invite them to my baby shower. They use the invite as a reminder to send a gift, which they enjoy doing.
So, I guess I am saying that it depends on the family. I am sure they meant no harm by it and either way (even if it was to get a gift).
Also, my family is all local with very few exceptions, whereas DH's is spread out all over the country, so I think that makes a difference too.
If you decide to send a gift, I am sure they will be grateful and if not, they probably wouldn't care.
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| Posted 6/4/07 4:08 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Settle an argument...
I've sent invitations to OOT relatives hoping that they would come but with the understanding that they might not be able.
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| Posted 6/4/07 4:20 PM |
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Booklady1017
Information Goddess
Member since 5/05 4149 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: Settle an argument...
Yeah they might have just wanted to let you know what was going on. Probably didn't mean anything by it. I don't know how close you are with them (that would help me decide if I wanted to give them a gift).
Message edited 6/4/2007 5:20:37 PM.
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| Posted 6/4/07 5:19 PM |
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NewlyMrs
Laugh-Live-Love LIFE!
Member since 10/06 14432 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Settle an argument...
if you are close to them, is it possible they send it to make you feel involved?
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| Posted 6/4/07 5:23 PM |
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