Postpartum depression- update

Does anyone take anything for postpartum depression? I have a follow up on Tuesday. My twins are almost 6 months and it's not getting any better. I love them, but hate them. If they are crying I would rather leave them in their crib and cry then deal with them. I am miserable being a mother. Everyone says how they just love their kids and can't get enough of them. So much time has gone by and I still am on the fence about being a mother. I mean I love them, but I am besides myself some days. Most days I would rather just be at work and see them for 15 minutes. I thought I would grow out of this. My kids light up when they see me and I feel awful that I would rather wash dishes than play with them or tend to their needs. I feel like an awful mother and human being. I never ever in a million years thought I would be this way. A lot of the way I felt is how I felt when I found out I was having the twins. I took 1 baby it to a doctor appointment Tuesday and I felt like a real human and mother. I was able to take him out of the car seat and just walk into a story and carry him grab what I need, stop quick at work and just took him out of his car seat. No lugging a ton of stuff around. And those feelings of 2 came back. I HATE with a burning passion being a mom to twins. I really really do and I need to do something before I wake up one day and they are 30 and hate me for being an awful mother to them

Update- I had my OB apt today. I got a script for Zoloft. I'll start Friday so I'm home all weekend if I don't feel well. I know I need something. This isn't how I thought my life would be as a mother. I don't want to take medication but for my kids, I need to. I need to be a better mom to them

Message edited 6/27/2017 1:55:51 PM.

Re: Postpartum depression

My friend took Prozac after her 3rd. It was a very low dose. The lowest you could get and she was super nervous about taking it. The dr told her if you're that nervous, take half a pill to start. It changed her life! I'm so happy she did it.

She was crying all the time after her 3rd, just thought it was too overwhelming. She said there were days she really didn't want to get out of bed. One time she called me and said she felt like running away. I said don't I know it. Lol. She's like no, I keep thinking about getting in my car and just driving really far away by myself. I said oh lord, I'm coming over right now. The next day she went to see the dr. The change was immediate for her. She started laughing again, she stopped crying and said she was actually happy to be a mom again. She was on it for about 2 years and is no longer on it.

Definitely talk to your dr. There is help. You dont have to live being miserable (life is way too short for that). Hang in there momma! Being a mom is so tough and no one tells you how hard it really is (I'm a twin mom too so I get it).

Postpartum depression

Definitely talk to your doctor. I never took anything, but honestly didn't love being a mom until my son turned 1 and was more interactive. I love being a mom to a toddler.

Re: Postpartum depression

Definitely talk to your doctor and consider taking something. I waited about 6 months after my second was born to deal with my PPD and was prescribed a low dose of prozac and it helps immensely. I was on it for about a year and then "thought i was better" and went off it but unfortunately after a few months a lot of those overwhelming feelings came back. so rather than live in misery and fear being a horrible mother and quite frankly, live with the stigma of taking medication for a mental condition, i decided it was worth it to go back on it.

A healthy mom is a happy mom you are not alone!!

Postpartum depression

I'm on Zoloft. You're not alone. Fm me any time.

Re: Postpartum depression

I just wanted to tell you the first year I had my twins I was like a walking zombie. It was a blur

The first year is so so hard

Yes in some ways it's gets harder (when they get mobile) but in some ways it gets easier

I just wanted to let you know you're not a horrible mom

Two infants is hard. Really hard. It's no where near having one. Having them 15 months apart

Twins is twins. And it's hard. Fm me anytime

Hang in there

Re: Postpartum depression

I have triplets and I feel you. While you certainly gain a lot by being blessed with more than one baby, you lose a lot too. I totally relate to taking just one baby out and feeling like a human again. I never took my feelings seriously
At the time, and now five years later with a divorce about to be finalized, I wish I had. Get help, and it will get better

Postpartum depression

I just wanted to send some hugs. I don't have twins but can only imagine how exhausting it is and being a first time mother in itself is a huge culture shock. Please talk to you Dr. I took Lexapro for anxiety and it helped immensely. I am sure that a big portion of how u r feeling is hormonal not to mention you are exhausted. When I am exhausted I fcking hate everyone and everything. I just can't muster the energy to give two shits about anything. I hope you can find some help and that you feel well.

Re: Postpartum depression

DS is older, but I remember those first months being hard. I can't even imagine with twins. Talk to your doctor. You are not a bad mom, since you are here asking for help. Lots of hugs Hope you feel better soon!

Postpartum depression

I sent you a FM but I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story with such honesty. Not enough people talk about PPD or how hard it is to become a mom. I have no doubt your post has made other women feel less alone and that is remarkable. You are exactly the type of mom and woman we need more of in this world.

Re: Postpartum depression

I would definitely meet with a psychologist and do some counseling. When I had anxiety and depression the therapy really helped. Meds were not helpful for me and actually made me more anxious and depressed. For some they are lifesaving. I think regardless of whether or not you take medications its also really helpful to work with a therapist so at some point if you want to come off the meds you have some coping strategies to deal with the depressive feelings. A multimodal approach definitely is the most helpful in the long run (i.e. therapy +/- meds +/- exercise/diet changes etc)

Re: Postpartum depression

Postpartum depression

Thank you so much everyone for commenting and sharing how you feel. I sometimes don't know if this is postpartum or me just being a selfish and crappy mother at times. I have a very supportive DH, we went to dinner last night and talked. I know he's angry with how I feel but not angry at me, I think he just feels more helpless. He's always willing to take on what he can when he's home. Either way I'm going to talk to my doctor Tuesday, I need to something whether it be medication, therapy or just work on myself as a mother

Postpartum depression

seek out help from your MD, support groups and or therapy. You have a lot on your hands and it can be overwhelming

Re: Postpartum depression

My kids are 7 and a half and 5. I just went back on meds after YEARS cause Ive been feeling pretty bad. Youre not a bad mother. Motherhood is HARD!

Re: Postpartum depression

Re: Postpartum depression

Low dose of celexa. I was anxious and needed help. I feel like a better version of myself. Talk therapy, IMO doesn't help. My hormones as I get close to 40 are all over the place and these meds help significantly.

Message edited 6/25/2017 9:01:57 PM.

Re: Postpartum depression

I don't have twins, but when I had my second DC I realized how "easy" one was. Two is hard and I couldn't imagine twins. BUT, you will get through it. In no time at all they will be running around and hugging and kissing you and you will love being a mommy. In the meantime, talk to your dr. It's not something you need to suffer through! \

Postpartum depression

I've been on Zoloft since I had my first. I got off it when I was pregnant with my 2nd, and then as soon as I gave birth I went right back on it.

I fought taking meds for 8 months after having my first and I do not recommend doing that. A couple weeks after taking the zoloft I felt a million times better.

I had severe PPA with each one. I wanted to run away and never come back. It was really bad. Zoloft truly saved me.

I also go to therapy every 2 weeks, and the combination of therapy and meds is the best. It helps so much.

Good Luck!!

Re: Postpartum depression

Postpartum depression

You are not alone.
This is NOT you fault.
AND you will feel better!
The Postpartum Resource Center of NY once saved my life. Their website is postpartumny.org. Or call 631-422-2255. They have support groups and lots of resources.
It is so great that you reached out and said how you feel out loud.
Please FM me any time.

Message edited 6/26/2017 9:29:58 PM.

Postpartum depression

This broke my heart a little. You aren't a horrible mother! Talking to someone and possibly beginning medication will make the world of difference. Like others have said, were here for you.

Re: Postpartum depression

Definitely talk to your doctor. I started Lexapro about 7 weeks ago after suffering for 10 months after the birth of DS3. It has helped so much even in that short time. I feel like such a better mom now. I'm more patient, less irritable and I'm actually playing with my kids again. I'm also seeing a therapist to help me find some coping strategies for when the kids are out of control. Being a mom is hard and there is no shame in asking for help. You deserve to feel better, for yourself and your kids!

Postpartum depression- update

Update

Postpartum depression- update

I swear to you it will get better. They're so little. You're not alone. Good for you for reaching out, there is no reason you have to suffer.