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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
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Playground equitette question...(long)
I'm not quite sure how I want to handle this situation. It has not happened once, but twice and will continue to happen since we go to the same playground about the same time during the day.
There is a little 20 month old boy who is at the playgound accompanied by his grandfather. His grandfather supervises him from the ground as opposed to climbing the toys and following him which is what I do with my dd.
One of the playgyms has a steering wheel that makes it look like the child is driving a fire truck. DD loves to pretend she's driving as do all the other children. I never let dd push another child out of the way or do I let her play with the steering wheel while another child is playing with it. I tell her it isn't her turn yet and she has to let the little boy/girl play with it and then she can have a turn.
Well, this little boy loves the steering wheel and being that he is only 20 months old, he also doesn't like it when anyone else plays with it.
So today, the little boy was playing with it and dd wanted to but I made her wait her turn. The little boy when to play on the bridge and dd went to play with the steering wheel. As soon as she starts playing with it, this little boy comes back and starts playing with it while dd is and trying to push her out of the way. His grandfather keeps telling him to share and not to push the little girl - my dd. Then he turns to me and states that, "You know, they don't know how to share at this age." To which I replied, "That is very true, that is why I have to help dd wait for her turn." I was hoping that he would get the hint.
It was just so frustrating that he would not show his grandson how to wait his turn and share appropriately when I made my dd wait her turn.
What do you do in a situation like this? Am I being unreasonable?
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Posted 6/25/08 2:26 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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LiveAgain
Listen close....
Member since 8/07 3545 total posts
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
It would def. bother me if the little boy pushed DD out of the way. I think what you said to the grandfather was a great come back but obviously did not get through to him.
If it happens again I would make sure to tell him that I don't appreciate his grandson pushing my daughter out of the way and I would ask him to come take him out of the way so my daughter could play with the steering wheel since she had been waiting nice and patiently....I don't think he'll tell you no and maybe then he'll get the idea.
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| Posted 6/25/08 2:44 PM |
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shellybean
Love my Baby Boy!
Member since 4/07 5191 total posts
Name:
mich
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
its touchy with older people, I would probly just hope they arent there next time, maybe you can nicely show the little boy how to share! Not your job but...might help, maybe your daughter can bring something to share with him to show him how its done...
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| Posted 6/25/08 2:51 PM |
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Sweets13
Bella Bambini
Member since 5/05 9300 total posts
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
I would of been upset and you handled it the best you could....
I am very big on sharing......
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| Posted 6/25/08 2:54 PM |
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mom2mgn
Love my family
Member since 2/08 2267 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
Posted by shellybean
its touchy with older people, I would probly just hope they arent there next time, maybe you can nicely show the little boy how to share! Not your job but...might help, maybe your daughter can bring something to share with him to show him how its done...
I agree with this. It's really hard with grandparents. I know that my father watches DS sometimes and he lets DS get away with way more than if DH or I were watching him. My Father just has a different idea on things and he doesn't always know the best way to discipline or even how to show DS how to do things. Another problem is, my Father was never around when my sister and I were growing up. He was always working. He wouldn't know what to do in this situation and he wouldn't ask me or talk to me about it if it were him b/c that's just the way it is.
I'm not saying it's right, I'm just saying you probably need to be a little more lenient when dealing with a grandparent, especially a grandfather. Try helping him and showing him how to teach his grandson. I'm sure he'd appreciate it.
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| Posted 6/25/08 3:21 PM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
Posted by shamrock124
What do you do in a situation like this? Am I being unreasonable?
Not at all - while younger children may not completely understand the concept of taking turns and sharing I do feel that as the parent, or in this case grandparent responsible for the child, we have make every effort to encourage the proper behavior. Yeah, they might not get it now but eventually they will and the more you drive it home the faster they will get it.
I mean is the plan to let him have his way the day before his second birthday but then on the birthday say now you have to share?  I'll never understand that.
I think that your comment was perfect...maybe keep it up. Heck I'd even point blank say that he should interject when I just can't take it anymore. 
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| Posted 6/25/08 3:21 PM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
At that point I would say straight out that it is dd's turn now and he has to wait his turn. I might even comment that Grandpa needs to divert his attention so that dd gets her turn. Eventually your dd will probably just slug him.
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| Posted 6/25/08 8:33 PM |
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pmpkn087
Life is good...
Member since 9/05 18504 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
see...I do what probably most people don't like. This is how I would have handled that if it happend more than once.
I would squat down next to DC and tell the little boy "play nice, no shoving." If he continued then I would take my DC out of the situation. I know most people are against othe people 'reprimanding' your child (mind you I would NEVER raise my voice or speak meanly to someone else's kid), if the situation means my kid or yours, sorry but it's gonna be mine!
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| Posted 6/25/08 8:39 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
Posted by Ang-Rich
Posted by shamrock124
What do you do in a situation like this? Am I being unreasonable?
Not at all - while younger children may not completely understand the concept of taking turns and sharing I do feel that as the parent, or in this case grandparent responsible for the child, we have make every effort to encourage the proper behavior. Yeah, they might not get it now but eventually they will and the more you drive it home the faster they will get it.
I mean is the plan to let him have his way the day before his second birthday but then on the birthday say now you have to share? I'll never understand that.
I think that your comment was perfect...maybe keep it up. Heck I'd even point blank say that he should interject when I just can't take it anymore.
ITA. You can also say "If it's ok I'd like my daughter to continue my turn. Do you want me to redirect him or help him down so he can come to you?"
Message edited 6/25/2008 9:10:08 PM.
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| Posted 6/25/08 9:09 PM |
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annie
This is how I play basketball!
Member since 6/05 1980 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by Ang-Rich
Posted by shamrock124
What do you do in a situation like this? Am I being unreasonable?
Not at all - while younger children may not completely understand the concept of taking turns and sharing I do feel that as the parent, or in this case grandparent responsible for the child, we have make every effort to encourage the proper behavior. Yeah, they might not get it now but eventually they will and the more you drive it home the faster they will get it.
I mean is the plan to let him have his way the day before his second birthday but then on the birthday say now you have to share? I'll never understand that.
I think that your comment was perfect...maybe keep it up. Heck I'd even point blank say that he should interject when I just can't take it anymore.
ITA. You can also say "If it's ok I'd like my daughter to continue my turn. Do you want me to redirect him or help him down so he can come to you?"
good responses. i agree.
i would not be upset personally, kids push each other around a lot. my DD does it too. it's our job as their parents (or grandparents) to teach them how to share and not push.
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| Posted 6/26/08 11:02 AM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: Playground equitette question...(long)
If you tried the talking to the grandfather approach, you can also say something to the child "It's her turn sweetie, wait till she's done" Sometimes a child will listen to someone they don't know. After that honestly, I don't know what you can do. Yes he should share or someone should be helping him to share but he is also small. If the grandfather is not getting involved physically to remove the child or help him, your best bet is to bring your DD to another area and redirect her IMO. Not that I think you should kowtow to everyone but it's also a good lesson that you don't always have to battle with someone either and she can do something else (not that you're battling but you know what i mean) - there are all kinds of situations for kids where another child will not play nice and it's a good for her to see that she can still enjoy without letting that person ruin her fun. Then go back to it when he's not on it. it annoys me when people don't watch their kids and how they are interacting at the park and some kids are obnoxious but since it's a small kid, unless the adult gets directly involved physically, there's not much to do.
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| Posted 6/26/08 11:16 AM |
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