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lightblue
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 2249 total posts
Name:
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Outstanding RSVP question
Hi,
Just wanted to see what most people do when it comes to bday party RSVP's. This is the first year we decided to throw my son a bday party at a place (he has special needs and wasn't sure if he would be able to tolerate it , so we just did casual things at home w/ family in years past). When the RSVP date rolls around and you have outstanding responses, do you chase people down for responses or assume they are a no? I was talking to my sister and she told me for her kids parties, anyone who didn't answer she just puts them down as no. RSVP date is early next week, I only heard back from 3 parents so far, so I'm hoping people are just last min responders, but was just curious about what most people do with the outstanding responses. Thanks!
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Posted 8/1/18 9:19 AM |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name: ..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
If i know them and have their cell number, I will text them a few days after the response date and just say- hey, just need to give the place a head count so I was wondering if x was able to make X's party.
Because I have assumed no response has meant no before and been burned with people just showing up who never replied.
So I get a bit OCD about getting an answer one way or the other from everyone
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Posted 8/1/18 9:21 AM |
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dianadrw
LIF Adult

Member since 5/06 2092 total posts
Name: Me
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Outstanding RSVP question
We've only done one kid party so far but for the ones that didn't RSVP I texted them to follow up. I would say about half that hadn't rsvp'd were a yes. I'd text once to follow up, if you don't hear anything back assume they are a no. You might need to chase people down because it's summer.
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Posted 8/1/18 9:34 AM |
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oneday
<3

Member since 5/05 4319 total posts
Name: Pam
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Just went through this with DS's 5th birthday a few weeks ago. Sent 20 invites to his preschool. By the RSVP date (a week before the party) I had heard from 6 people. Unfortunately, he was no longer in the school as he is in camp so I couldn't even stalk people at pick up or anything. I had the # for two people from parties I'd RSVP'd to before so I just texted them. One said sorry, she forgot and the other said she never saw the invitation and they ended up coming. So, I don't know if other people didn't get it or what, but It was super annoying. One RSVP of yes didn't show and I didn't have any no replies show up. I had tried to see if the school could give me emails or #'s for people when I had them give them out in case I didn't hear, but they didn't have emails and wouldn't give numbers. Good luck, It was so stressful to me. Why people can't just respond is beyond me.
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Posted 8/1/18 9:53 AM |
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JandJ1224

Member since 6/06 5911 total posts
Name: Jannette
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
I just sent out texts for my DDs party because most people didn't respond. I got responses from oh misplaced invite to never received or meant to text.
Several that hadn't responded are coming so I would definitely reach out via text. I think especially in the summer people aren't as on top of things.
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Posted 8/1/18 9:54 AM |
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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name: Christina
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
I hunted them down. 3/4 were a yes.
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Posted 8/1/18 12:27 PM |
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
I've found most people RSVP on the last day, or the day after - especially for summer parties. If they don't respond, I text them, because it makes it easier for me to not have people showing up that I didn't know were going to.
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Posted 8/1/18 1:54 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name: Katherine
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Outstanding RSVP question
I usually follow up
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Posted 8/1/18 3:44 PM |
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SecretlyTTC14
LIF Adult
Member since 12/13 1770 total posts
Name: B
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
If I could, I would follow up and ask. If not, I would just count them as a no.
We have a bday party next month and the mom just reached out on FB and asked if we were coming. I guess I didn't realize the RSVP date was an entire month before the party. She prob thinks I'm a jerk for not rsvping on time. I didn't even look at the rsvp date when we got the invite. I thought it would be the normal 1-2 weeks before.
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Posted 8/1/18 4:11 PM |
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lightblue
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 2249 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Posted by SecretlyTTC14
If I could, I would follow up and ask. If not, I would just count them as a no.
We have a bday party next month and the mom just reached out on FB and asked if we were coming. I guess I didn't realize the RSVP date was an entire month before the party. She prob thinks I'm a jerk for not rsvping on time. I didn't even look at the rsvp date when we got the invite. I thought it would be the normal 1-2 weeks before.
A month? wow yes that is a bit much in advance lol. I did 10 days since the place said they would call me about a week prior for a head count.
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Posted 8/1/18 4:20 PM |
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MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *

Member since 2/09 6243 total posts
Name: Gina
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
I reach out right away... I need to know and it’s rude to not get a response.
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Posted 8/1/18 4:44 PM |
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itsagoodlife
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/15 619 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Count them as a no. And if they’re rude enough to show up anyway, I’d send them on their way. I’m sorry but that’s OBNOXIOUS... why should you have to hunt them down? “Oh sorry... when you didn’t rsvp, I assumed you were unable to make it. We’ve only prepared and paid for X amount of kids. Maybe next time” Harsh perhaps but I’m so over people. I am so glad my kids are older and don’t have parties anymore.
Message edited 8/1/2018 11:46:29 PM.
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Posted 8/1/18 11:45 PM |
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M514
Hi
Member since 8/10 6011 total posts
Name:
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Outstanding RSVP question
If I have their contact info, then I reach out to find out if they’re coming. I’ve had people ravp 2 days before a party. Of course I didn’t turn them away, but it’s annoying.
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Posted 8/2/18 7:15 AM |
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blu6385
Member since 5/08 8351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
If I can follow up with them I do. Its very annoying. Esp. Since I write RSVP yes or no. I have gotten yes the night before!
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Posted 8/2/18 9:22 AM |
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Budjeg11
LIF Adult
Member since 4/11 2644 total posts
Name:
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Outstanding RSVP question
I usually use evite or punchbowl for invitations for kids parties so I just send a reminder email through them after the rsvp date (and right before also). I have also texted those that I felt close enough to contact or had their number handy.
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Posted 8/2/18 10:20 AM |
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SecretlyTTC14
LIF Adult
Member since 12/13 1770 total posts
Name: B
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Posted by itsagoodlife
Count them as a no. And if they’re rude enough to show up anyway, I’d send them on their way. I’m sorry but that’s OBNOXIOUS... why should you have to hunt them down? “Oh sorry... when you didn’t rsvp, I assumed you were unable to make it. We’ve only prepared and paid for X amount of kids. Maybe next time” Harsh perhaps but I’m so over people. I am so glad my kids are older and don’t have parties anymore.
I would feel sooo bad doing that to the kid though  It's not their fault their Mom can't be bothered or forgot to RSVP.
TBH I have certain family members that never RSVP and they are almost always late. So I guess I'm just use to it and I accommodate them. I'm the type that is always prepared for extra guests. I always have extra favors etc. We've always have the attitude of "the more the merrier". So as much as I hate late rsvps or someone showing up after not rsvping... I would never turn them away. I try to have an accurate head count, but I always make sure the venue can fit a few extras just in case.
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Posted 8/2/18 10:22 PM |
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itsagoodlife
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/15 619 total posts
Name:
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Posted by SecretlyTTC14
Posted by itsagoodlife
Count them as a no. And if they’re rude enough to show up anyway, I’d send them on their way. I’m sorry but that’s OBNOXIOUS... why should you have to hunt them down? “Oh sorry... when you didn’t rsvp, I assumed you were unable to make it. We’ve only prepared and paid for X amount of kids. Maybe next time” Harsh perhaps but I’m so over people. I am so glad my kids are older and don’t have parties anymore.
I would feel sooo bad doing that to the kid though  It's not their fault their Mom can't be bothered or forgot to RSVP.
TBH I have certain family members that never RSVP and they are almost always late. So I guess I'm just use to it and I accommodate them. I'm the type that is always prepared for extra guests. I always have extra favors etc. We've always have the attitude of "the more the merrier". So as much as I hate late rsvps or someone showing up after not rsvping... I would never turn them away. I try to have an accurate head count, but I always make sure the venue can fit a few extras just in case.
I hear what you’re saying however maybe a disappointed kid will motivate the parents to not be rude a$$es anymore.
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Posted 8/2/18 10:50 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name: L
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Re: Outstanding RSVP question
Posted by SecretlyTTC14
If I could, I would follow up and ask. If not, I would just count them as a no.
We have a bday party next month and the mom just reached out on FB and asked if we were coming. I guess I didn't realize the RSVP date was an entire month before the party. She prob thinks I'm a jerk for not rsvping on time. I didn't even look at the rsvp date when we got the invite. I thought it would be the normal 1-2 weeks before. [/QUOTE ]
A month? Was it a bar mitzvah? I don't even send out the invite until a few weeks before the party, neither do our friends. I just text, fb, or call the parent who did not respond. I guess I don't make it a big deal.
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Posted 8/3/18 10:24 AM |
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LiveItUp
Love my babies!

Member since 8/11 4096 total posts
Name:
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Outstanding RSVP question
We had a few last minute rsvps for my Dds party and a couple responded a day or 2 late as well. I think a lot of people wait til the RSVP date to respond, and some forget bc they bc stuck the invitation somewhere out of sight. I think it's fine to send a text on or after the RSVP date.
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Posted 8/4/18 7:11 AM |
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