Now that I'm feeling better...

Just an update on me! My twins are almost 8 weeks old already! It's crazy how time flew! I want to thank everyone for their support and advice over the past 2 months! Being a mom isn't easy, one baby, two babies, three babies, however many! I put a lot of pressure on myself to be a good mom and a mom I always expected myself to be. When I found out I was pregnant, I was so excited! I envisioned a natural drug free birth, would breastfeed, and would do all these things, have plenty of play time, reading time, you name it! Well I want to say to every mom and expectant mother that what we expect and envision is not always reality and that is ok! I had such a hard time initially finding out I was having twins. After a while I accepted it, once the twins were born depression hit 10 fold. Nothing I envisioned was what happened. I had an emergency c-section, my one twin never latched, the other tried but would scream so hard he would never get anything. I tried pumping as much as I could and did well the first 2 weeks, after that, life got crazy and I could barely keep up, I was so hard on myself, put so much pressure on myself to pump for them I became even more depressed my life consisted of feeding, changing and pumping. I felt miserable and isolated. I decided that, and from much support on here, my fed babies are happy babies and my mental clarity allowed me to be a better mom. That is the best advice I got. My kids are happy (most of the time! Lol) they are fed, they are loved, regardless of how they came into this world, how they are fed, how often I read to them, how often I hold them. I bond with them as much as I can, hold them together and individually when I can, and love them so much that it hurts, and they know it! Life with multiples isn't easy, some days I want to scream, but then when I see them sleeping, or smiling back at me, and content I know I've done my job as a mom and I know they know they are loved! So thank you to everyone who supported me, and to the expectant moms, know the overwhelmed feeling is normal, know your mental sanity is necessary to be a good mom (and yes, at first you will feel selfish for it, but it passes and you will be a better mom) and that sometimes expectations and reality are very different but at the end of the day those fed, loved, content happy babies know that you love them and you are their heros!

Now that I'm feeling better...

It is a huge adjustment with just one baby, and you had two! So glad to hear you are doing better. It sounds like you are a wonderful mom!

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So happy to hear!

Now that I'm feeling better...

Thank you for posting this. Dh and I were talking about how much the hospital where I delivered pushed exclusively breastfeeding. My child wouldn't stay latched and DD lost a lot of weight because she wasn't getting enough to eat. A nurse even yelled at me because of it. Mothers, especially new moms need to know that motherhood doesn't necessarily turn out the way we plan and it's okay to deviate. Your child won't die if you don't breastfeed and they can still thrive in life being bottlefed.

I remember when you first found out you were having twins and I am extremely happy to hear how well everything turned out for you and your babies.

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Great update!

In your words, your babies are fed and Loved - you're getting it right :) Good job, Mama.

Now that I'm feeling better...

Thank you for posting this. This sh!t is HARD and I firmly believe that the more we acknowledge how tough it is the less alone we make other new moms feel. As moms and as women, we should be supporting one another and not sugarcoating our experiences. Because for every new mom who is basking in the glow of new mommyhood, there are 20 more covered in puke and crying on the couch.

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So glad to hear you're in a better place and the boys are doing well! I really hate how hard breastfeeding is pushed and I have breastfed for almost a year now. It's NOT easy and we're made to feel like it should be natural and it's what's best. Sure, there are some benefits, but not at the cost of your mental health. Babies need a mom who feels good about herself more than they need breast milk!

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I'm so happy to hear that you are in a better place now. It's fu*c*ing HARD!
I'm glad you got some great advice that helped you realize that you were being too hard on yourself and that you are just like every other Mom trying to get from one day to the next. The stress, the guilt, the anxiety and sometimes depression can really kick our ass and make us feel like we aren't good enough. You are so strong and you should be so proud of yourself for acknowledging what was happening and making a change that was not only better for you but for your family! YOU ROCK!!

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Glad you are feeling better!

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You're a tough mama! Hang in there, you're doing a great job!

Now that I'm feeling better...

I am glad that you are feeling better. Having a newborn is such a hard time to begin with. No one should feel like they are not doing their best at any point of it.

I learned with DS who was our first that I will not let anyone bully me into BFing, which is what happened at the hospital. It was awful and just plain wrong. When we had DD 3 years later, I stood my ground about not BFing and didn't take anyone's shiit about it either. Like you said, your babies are FED and that right there is the BEST thing.

Hang in there, it gets easier.

Now that I'm feeling better...

so glad you're feeling better!!!

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Good for you! I'm so glad you are doing better.

Now that I'm feeling better...

I am SO happy you are feeling better!