Not sure I'll even try this month

Warning: Major over-analyzing below.

And will be taking a break until at least Jan.
My brother is getting married next summer. If it happens this month, I'll have the baby a month and a half before. At first I thought that would be fine, but now I'm thinking how am I possibly going to leave a newborn for a good chunk of the day and night? Both DH and I are in the wedding party.
Dh thinks it's ridiculous to pause our life for one event and that will figure it out, but it's my brothers wedding! And I don't think he gets how difficult--logistically and emotionally--it will be to leave a baby that young with anyone.

I'd probably wait until Jan to start trying again. I don't have a problem with being pregnant for the wedding, but I don't want to risk being due that month.
I'm just so bummed b/c I'm really ready and Jan just seems so far away (though I know it's really not).


Sorry for the vent. I realize this might be a no-brainer for some of you. And I do know what I should do, but I'm so ready. I just wish I went off the pill earlier so we would've started sooner.

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

I'm not sure what I would do, I would probably keep trying but it's totally up to you! Good Luck whatever you choose!

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

i dont think you should stress about the wedding. I will be 17w pregnant at my brother's November 09 wedding and my sister who is having her 1st tomorrow via csection will be there aswell. She will be leaving her with her DH's aunt! It isnt a huge deal and you shouldnt let that dictate whether or not you will try for a baby. I will also be 2w PP at one of DH's best friends wedding in May 2010. I will be going, DH is in the bridal party, it wasnt even really a thought. My mother and/or MIL will watch the baby.

Adding stress will make the journey harder on you. I think you just need to relax and go with the flow, as hard as it is sometimes.

You cant really plan everything out and to try to do so will only make you insane

GOOD LUCK

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

Thanks ladies. I talked to DH again and he thinks we should just proceed--maybe just taking the break the month that would make me due right around the wedding.
If my parents or his could watch the baby (assuming there even is one, I would feel better, but they'll both be at the wedding.
I just we'll just figure it if it happens. Thanks for listening.

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

That is a tough one, but I am not sure if you can stop your life...plus you don't even know if you will get pregnant right now....my sister just got engaged and is getting married next October. I feel the clock ticking on me, but you really can't plan for everything. Trust me I know..especially with the m/c this summer. I would've never expected that

You have to do what's best for you though...

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

Personally.. i wouldn't put your TTC efforts on hold because of the wedding because there is NO guarantee that you'll get pregnant this month, next month, or even the month after that. It could take you up to 6 months to get pregnant (which is normal for most women) or even longer.
I don't know how long you've been off BC, but it can take several months for your cycles to get regulated to where you're ovulating again and can even get pregnant.

I've come to realize that you can't try and plan anything around this whole process.. all you can do is sit back and let what will happen happen.
What if you wait until January, and then it takes you another 6 months after that to even get pregnant.. If the timing doesn't matter to you, then by all means take a break. But i just wanted to point out the possible implications of waiting.

If you do happen to get pregnant and deliver before your brother's wedding, i'm sure that you and your DH will figure something out - many people have been in the same situation as you!

good luck!

Re: Not sure I'll even try this month

I have to say my brother in law is getting married next summer, and I can totally understand where you are coming from. My DH is also in agreement w/ yours, that we can't plan our lives around other ppl's. That grounds me for a minute, and I am like you are right. Then I think about how no matter what it is his brother's wedding, and we will have to be involved in all of it no matter what. DH is the best man. I am of the thinking if it happens, we will worry about it at the time. My parents would not attend to stay home w/ DC, and I would go to the ceremony, and then prob come home before the reception to pump or feed the baby. It is not an ideal situation but if we have to figure something out we will.

I look at it from this point of view. There will always be some sort of family obligation, work obligation, or something that will make things difficult. If not this wedding, another. So I say if you are ready go for it now!! You never know how long it may take, and DH is right you will figure it out. What is that saying god laughs as we plan?