Moms of elementary school girls...

Are they facetiming, texting, or using youtube/Facebook/Instagram with their friends???

It seems many of my of my 8 yo DD's friends are. She has an ipad and I just recently set up an account to facetime/text, but listening (overhearing) and reading these texts makes me wonder if I should put an end to it.


Just looking to see what other parents have done.

Moms of elementary school girls...

Screen time is VERY limited for my almost 8 year old. She plays kid stuff on her android PC size tablet thing, but not very often, ,and she likes to watch gymnastics videos on youtube, which I have to monitor since there are zero parental controls on there. I would definitely not allow texting, instagram, etc. That is just over the top to me. I think it's a little ridiculous to be honest. So many kids have those things shoved in their faces ALL the time.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

My kids aren't old enough for this, but as a teacher it horrifies me.

Just too many opportunities for things to get out of controlled, especially unsupervised.

I can't tell you how many times I've seen "good" kids do/say/post some stupid, scary stuff online. Even a gifted and talented kid with his own YouTube account- full name first and last- and some really questionable content posted.

Better to be safe than sorry imho I wouldn't allow it

Moms of elementary school girls...

DD is 7. She has DH's original I-pad. She almost never uses it. Instead she uses his I-pad mini to watch Disney movies.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

I have an 11 yo and 9 yo. DD1 started using IG half way through 5th grade. I said no in 4th but went to a family friend party and she was the only girl there who did not have IG and I could see how left out she was. I know there are kids who are not allowed but very few. I feel like being that kid who is left out is more harmful than allowing her to use IG. Others may disagree. I had a friend who wasnt allowed to watch TV. She would come to school and we would all be talking about a recent episode of a show and she would lie and say she saw it.

I see both sides to letting them use these things or not. Once you let them its almost impossible to monitor every little thing its like a full time job. She doesnt have FB but there are other things out there, KIK, oovoo, snapchat etc.

Just on the IG acct i am horrified reading what some of her 11yo friends are feeling going through etc. Alot of depression!! She knows i read everything. Many also have multiple accounts.

Youtube has a lot of educational and other good stuff but again hard to monitor

DD2 started imessaging from an ipad last month and uses FT with 1 friend. Thats it. She hasnt asked for anything else but i think her class/friends are behind compared to DD1.

I think its unrealistic to never let them use these things but say no as long as possible then try to limit which programs they are on and how long.

Message edited 3/8/2015 5:31:05 PM.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

My dd will be 8 next month. She has her own iPad mini (which we monitor and control her use of closely). She has 1 friend that she FaceTimes with (she moved to Delaware this summer and they FaceTime or talk on the phone once a week) and she FaceTimes with her cousins once in a while. I try to keep the iPad use for strictly educational games (she has a reading program from school on it), but she likes to earn time on it for doing her chores and helping out at home.

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Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Moms of elementary school girls...

My DS is 9 and has been asking for an instagram account for over a year. Some of his friends have it but I won't let him. I know some of his friends' moms also won't allow it. He is fine without it. He does not have much in the way of technology (no x-box, playstation, DS, etc). He has my old desktop computer, a Nook and a Wii (which he barely uses). We monitor everything.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Message edited 3/8/2015 8:15:52 PM.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

My DD is 9. Most of her friends have cell phones, ipads and ipad minis - DD got a kindle this xmas so she cannot facetime. She uses my whatsapp account to send messages to her cousin and some other family members but its my account and I can read and see everythng she posts.

I dont want my DD to feel left out but at this stage if her friends want to chat with her they can call our landline or come over for a play date. Under no circumstances will she have a FB account or instagram until she is a teenager and even then I will be closely monitoring.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Dd is 7, in 2nd grade but has no social media accounts. She will FaceTime my Mom on my phone occasionally. As far as I know, none of her friends have any fb accounts either.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Are we talking 8 in 2nd or 8 in 3rd? In 2nd, no way - none of them have this. They have ipads but just for apps etc. Around here it seems by 5th grade all the girls have. Before that, it depends on the type of parent. My oldest is a boy and not there yet but, I have a lot of friends with older DD's and this is what I hear. They all felt like they had no choice by 5th but VERY closely monitor. To be honest, it scares the heck out of me and I am dreading these days approaching :( Good luck!

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

DS is turning 9 next month and DD is in 2nd grade turning 8.

They both have iPad mini's and all messaging and face timing is disabled. They have never asked and I would not allow it. We asked DS if anyone has cell phones in his class and he said no.

My friend has been allowing her DD to message and FaceTime since last year (2nd grade) and it does more harm than good. I see the cliques forming and I just don't think it is necessary.

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Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

I don't mind my DD (or other children) Facetiming/texting relatives (usually on my account), but after observing my DD and her friends, I only saw the potential for bad stuff to happen.

FTR, my DD is in 3rd grade. She has been bugging me all school year for an Instagram account and to be able to Facetime. We recently had to put our dog down and my DD hasn't been handling it all that well, so this past Friday in a moment of weakness I agreed to set up Facetime. (In general, I try and keep electronic devices to a minimum during the week/only on weekends.)


The girls were texting photos/images back and forth and they were sending some creepy images meanwhile my DD is sending photos of Shopkins. Obviously I was concerned how the other girls were stumbling upon those other "images."

Then one of the girls came up with the idea of "The Selfie Contest" and she was going to judge all the girls' selfies. I told my DD she wasn't participating, mainly because I was afraid of where that may go. (The idea that 8-9 year olds know what a selfie is saddens me.)

Anyway, after reading some of these posts, I think I may just shut facetime/texting down. I just think they're too young and no good can come of it.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

My oldest DD will be 10 this year (4th) and my middle DD is almost 8 (2nd). They do not have "i" anything, nor do they have any social media accounts, nor do they text or FaceTime. I don't care if I--or they--are in the Stone Age, and it's as simple as that...for now

My oldest does have a Kindle; she has a Pinterest acct. and she uses YouTube almost exclusively for crafting, Disney stuff, and Harry Potter. I know at least two of her friends have Instagram, and I've heard of a couple of both girls' friends texting with itouches. I'm not aware of any having phones.

My kids go to Catholic school which goes until 8th grade; I "plan" to keep them away from this stuff until high school, but I'm pretty sure I'll be revisiting and/or revising the conversation in 6th...

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

Posted by Eireann

My oldest DD will be 10 this year (4th) and my middle DD is almost 8 (2nd). They do not have "i" anything, nor do they have any social media accounts, nor do they text or FaceTime. I don't care if I--or they--are in the Stone Age, and it's as simple as that...for now

My oldest does have a Kindle; she has a Pinterest acct. and she uses YouTube almost exclusively for crafting, Disney stuff, and Harry Potter. I know at least two of her friends have Instagram, and I've heard of a couple of both girls' friends texting with itouches. I'm not aware of any having phones.

My kids go to Catholic school which goes until 8th grade; I "plan" to keep them away from this stuff until high school, but I'm pretty sure I'll be revisiting and/or revising the conversation in 6th...

Moms of elementary school girls...

Most of the kids in my daughter's class, 2nd grade, have I pads. They do not facetime with each other or have any other accounts that I'm aware of. We let DD facetime with family and we create her contact list so those are the people she can facetime. In our school almost all the kids get phones when they graduate 6th grade. I think that is a good time and will be following that trend lol.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

I regret letting my 6th grade son have Instagram. The stuff that goes on is DISGUSTING.

I have taken it away. He will NOT be back on there and my other 2 younger children will NOT have access either.

Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

I have 2 DDs, 7 and 10. My 10 year old DD is in 5th grade and might be one of the only girls that does not have IG or facetime and we hear about it often. I let her use an older itouch to text ONE friend and I monitor it....I do feel bad as she is left out to some extent but we are holding off as long as possible. Realistically we will probably allow social media next year in 6th grade and get her a phone. The phone is also for us to communicate with her easily.

My 7 year old DD is in 2nd grade and has no social media access. She uses the laptop and tablet and is all over the web playing games, goggling Disney actors and watching youtube videos. We watch over her, but she always tells me when she comes across something that wasn't appropriate. None of her friends access social media at all.

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Re: Moms of elementary school girls...

my DD just turned 11. She got her 1st itouch last year at Christmas. She does not have Facebook, instagram, pintrest etc. She does facetime with a few girls from school. She has asked for instagram, but I won't let her have that yet. I don't think they fully understand, once it's out there, it's there for good. I also don't think they fully understand what is appropriate and what isn't I have full access to everything, passwords to everything, etc. She knows I read the texts and all, and I comment on them as well to her about what is written. She does ok with it, but I have seen some thins written by her friends that make me cringe. A lot of them have phones, which we told her not until 6th grade graduation, but we are getting one sooner as she swims and the practices are closed to the parents and I want her to have the phone just in case. She had a meet recently, and while I was there, I could not get in touch with her and that frankly made me nervous