Just feeling bad - nursery

I don't know if its the hormones - but I see all these beautiful nursery pictures and I feel sad and like a failure. We are currently in a 1 bedroom apt and do not forsee us moving out before our lease is up (which is also the day the baby is due). I intellectually know that the baby does not "need" its own room for the first year - but I feel really sad about it.

Our apartment is a good size and we will be making the dining room into a "nursery" using room dividers to make walls.

Just venting

Message edited 1/23/2013 5:22:56 PM.

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

I can understand why you are sad. If you read these boards you will see that a lot of people have different experiences and many couples don't get to do one or more of the traditional things (e.g. some women won't be getting a baby shower, etc.). At the end of the day, all that matters is that you have a healthy LO (and hopefully a pregnancy that is not too rough along the way). I think when the baby gets here you will be so overwhelmed by him/her that you won't think about the nursery situation too much. You can still always look forward to the room that you will eventually get to set up and decorate, even if it won't be exactly on the schedule you would prefer.

Good luck!

Just feeling bad - nursery

Eventually you will have a nursery. But the LO won't care. I know when I see gorgeous nurseries on here I want to buy what they have but I have to be cost conscious so I'm doing the best I can with what I have.

Just feeling bad - nursery

Thanks girls...it just wasn't what I pictured. But of course the baby is the most important part!! My mom has reminded me that baby's use to sleep in dresser drawers LOL

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

I feel you! Right now I live in a disaster zone created by sandy....I just hope the insurance money comes in time to do the extension, which it won't. I know my baby will be cared for and fine in ouroom but like you said I really want a nursery!!! I have all these ideas but nowhere to make them happen. Everything will work out and as long as children and do our best to take care of them they will be happy babies!!!!

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

I see how you can be sad. I was in a weird position when my twins were born. I was living in a studio apt waiting to find out if we got our house. I couldn't do anything to prepare for the babies.

I wound up having them early and still had really no place to go. I stayed with my parents for a few weeks after they were born. I was in tears the night before they came home from the hospital as I started opening some of my shower gifts. As soon as they got home I quickly realized a baby doesn't need much. Just clothes, diapers, food, a place to sleep and love!

I never was able to make the nursery of my dreams but we made do and honestly I am just grateful they are happy and healthy little kids.

hang in there!

Just feeling bad - nursery

I hope this makes you feel better. We have a 3 bedroom house and kept DS with us until 10 months. So even if you have the space you may not use it. Don't feel bad. They don't know the difference.

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

Its better this way - your little one will develop their own personality and by the time you have a room for them, you can decorate it in a theme that you know your LO will love!
I am so surprised by how much my son changed his first year at life and how I can tell his faves already. I can tell he loves barney, gabba, trucks, keys, cell phones and ...well..paper more than anything else! Yet his room (which is not catalog material at all- all handmedown furniture and mix matching decor) is decorated in animals. ;o)

Just feeling bad - nursery

Thanks again everyone!!

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

We're in a 1 bedroom apt too and not doing a 'nursery'.

My parents are unintentionally making me feel bad by saying we should be buying a house or something and I have no desire to.

I always had my own room growing up -- DH did not. And I honestly -- not only KNOW our kid doesn't need its own room right off the bat, but am kind of psyched for it.


My intention is to make he/she its own space within a room. We'll make it work. And so will you.



"The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less."

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

Dont feel bad, we wont have a nursery for our baby until after he/she is born. I am a planner so its hard but I am trying to wing it. Even the bedrooms our kids now have are so small, I could never do the beautiful nurserys/rooms that some people do. But I am happy to have a roof over our heads :)

Just feeling bad - nursery

We made do with the small space that we had using the half room we had for half a nursery and have space for our stuff still. It's not ideal but we made it work. My good friend lived in a 1 bedroom apt the first year with her LO and shared a room and it was just fine for them until they moved into a 2 bedroom apt. So don't worry!!!

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

I"m in the same spot. Our baby was a surprise and we moved into my in law's basement literally two weeks before I found out I was pregnant. It makes me feel terrible sometimes but at the end of the day my baby will always have a warm place to sleep, food and love. One day we will have a house and be able to give our baby what we want.

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

Don't feel bad for one second!!

We had a little apartment when Johnny was born...he didn't have a fancy nursery, and it didn't matter one bit. He was loved, fed, cared for, had everything he needed. He didn't know and now he's 6...he has a nice big boy room that he loves (and shares with his brother), and the new baby will have a little nursery only because we now have some more space. Babies don't need much...it'll be GREAT and know you aren't alone!!

Just feeling bad - nursery

Try not to let it get to you. With my first, we moved 5 days before she was born and just started her nursery. Furniture didn't arrive until a few weeks or more after she was born. We didn't use it much for the first six month. She slept in our room. With my second, she didn't have a nursery at all until 6 mths. I had so much fun making it at that time. I'm on my third now and it's the first time I will have a nursery ready before the baby arrives.

Just feeling bad - nursery

Awe... I completely understand. We live in a small one bedroom and having a lot of trouble finding a bigger place. I really hate to be negative about things but I really feel I'm not going to be able to think about setting up a nursery until I know for sure we are out of this place!! I had ideas and just keep them written down :( I hope everything works out for you-.... Hang in there!

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

I agree with everyone else at the beginning baby wont' sleep in his/her own room so don't feel so bad about it.!! You will have a chance to have a beautiful nursery soon enough don't worry cheer up!!

Just feeling bad - nursery

This LO won't have a room of his own for a while...we just don't have an extra bedroom right now so he'll be bunking in our room for a while...no big deal. you do what you can and that's all that matters

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

Don't feel bad at all. We live in a 1 bedroom coop. DS is just fine in our room. I decorated the corner where his crib is with wall hangings and it looks perfect to me. All that matters to your LO is the love you give him/her.

Re: Just feeling bad - nursery

We only had a one bedroom too. The baby just wants to be loved and taken care of and doesn't care what nursery it has!

Just feeling bad - nursery

We have a one bedroom too, i was sad at first but now that DD is 4 months I'm glad she is in the same room as me. Its easier for me to check up on her because I just look over to the crib at night. Like the other posters said babies dont need their own room as of yet. Hopefully we will be able to buy a 2 br soon and DD will have her own room but as of right now I'm glad shes near me.