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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Is it ever appropriate
to tell someone they look like sh it?
i mean, is it every acceptable to walk into someone's house and have that be the first thing said to you?
discuss.
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Posted 1/20/08 9:59 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
PreshusSmurf
So in love with my little guys
Member since 1/07 2963 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
i think a lot of that depends on how close you are to a person.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:01 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
its my bil and while we are friendly with one another, we are not that close.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:02 PM |
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nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
I'd definitely say it to family or DH. We're honest like that.  My mom's said it to me, and I usually appreciate it...Sometimes you need someone to tell you that.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:02 PM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by nov04libride
I'd definitely say it to family or DH. We're honest like that. My mom's said it to me, and I usually appreciate it...Sometimes you need someone to tell you that.
Same here. My best friends and I are brutally honest with each other also.
Message edited 1/20/2008 10:04:59 PM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:04 PM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
for me it would definitely depend on who said it and what our relationship is like.
if it's someone that you're not very close with... i'd say it was probably a mistake on the part of your BIL.
do you think it was a feable attempt at humor or a way to joke around with you?
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:06 PM |
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MrsPornStar
Partners in crime
Member since 10/05 14656 total posts
Name:
Mama
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by saraH
its my bil and while we are friendly with one another, we are not that close.
In this case, I say no, it's not appropriate. You're not close so I think it's wrong. Even if you looked like poo, you don't have that kind of relationship wtih him.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:06 PM |
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
This is a tough one, if I know my girlfriend is feeling crappy, and she just looks miserable, and is in her pjs with a red nose and a box of kleenex in bed with her ill say it lovingly/joking and ask if theres anything they want/need, and try to take care of them. I think its different if you can tell the person is trying to look nice, or trying to push through whats bothering them.
Months ago, I went to MIL's and it was the first thing she said to me when I walked through the door, I had really bad morning sickness at the time, and I honestly put a lot of effort into the way I looked that day. I know I was pale, and looked like I had been vomitting 10 times a day, but I also know that she could tell I was really trying to look nice. I was very hurt, and for the first time ever, in the 5+ years I have known her, I told her how rude her comment was.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:07 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
umm no, even if it were true, I would never say that to anyone. not DH, my Mom, BFF, etc.
I might say something like "are you feeling ok"?
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:08 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
I will say it to my brother and that's about it. He knows Im joking around or I'll say it if he's feeling like crap.
I wouldn't say it to anyone else.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:08 PM |
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by MrsPornStar
Posted by saraH
its my bil and while we are friendly with one another, we are not that close.
In this case, I say no, it's not appropriate. You're not close so I think it's wrong. Even if you looked like poo, you don't have that kind of relationship wtih him.
I agree, it comes lovingly from someone you are close with..its different from anyone else.
I would have told him " I may look like sh*t but I still and always look better than you" but im just petty like that
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:09 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
he was half kidding but half serious.
and my response to him was, "well its nice to see you too."
ps - this was after him and his gf popped over to see the baby.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:32 PM |
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Cpt2007
A new love!
Member since 1/08 5946 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
umm no, even if it were true, I would never say that to anyone. not DH, my Mom, BFF, etc.
I might say something like "are you feeling ok"?
yep, same.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:34 PM |
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MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.
Member since 5/05 26170 total posts
Name:
MrsERod™®
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by MrsPornStar
Posted by saraH
its my bil and while we are friendly with one another, we are not that close.
In this case, I say no, it's not appropriate. You're not close so I think it's wrong. Even if you looked like poo, you don't have that kind of relationship wtih him.
i have to agree. i probably would have told him to go fly a kite 
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:40 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
i spoke to his gf about it, she came with me upstairs to change the baby.
she apologized for him. she said that he's been crappy since he started the academy. not making excuses for him, just telling me what she's seen.
maybe i kind of overreacted, i just didn't expect him to say that to me.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:43 PM |
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MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.
Member since 5/05 26170 total posts
Name:
MrsERod™®
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by saraH
i spoke to his gf about it, she came with me upstairs to change the baby.
she apologized for him. she said that he's been crappy since he started the academy. not making excuses for him, just telling me what she's seen.
maybe i kind of overreacted, i just didn't expect him to say that to me.
what academy is he enrolled in? Tactless U? 
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:45 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
I think i'll call him at 2 am for the baby's feeding.
think then he'll know why i look like sh it
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:48 PM |
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NASP09
...
Member since 6/05 6030 total posts
Name:
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Re:
Message edited 3/3/2010 11:29:45 PM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 11:06 PM |
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9924 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
According to mom, she thinks this is VERY appropriate
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| Posted 1/21/08 6:30 AM |
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yankinmanc
Happy Days!
Member since 8/05 18208 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
It would depend on your relationship with the person, if someone said it to me, it would be no big deal. I would say it to my best friend, or my husband...or maybe even my sister. It wouldn't bother them.
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| Posted 1/21/08 7:47 AM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Another benefit of being male...... Guys can say that to each other. If you are close, it's OK. If you are kidding, it's OK. If you've just met, but were introduced by someone who is close to both of you, it's OK. If you just met in a social setting with lots of other guys (gym, bar, party, etc), it's OK.
  
Women on the other hand..... not so much...
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| Posted 1/21/08 8:04 AM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by GoldenRod
Another benefit of being male...... Guys can say that to each other. If you are close, it's OK. If you are kidding, it's OK. If you've just met, but were introduced by someone who is close to both of you, it's OK. If you just met in a social setting with lots of other guys (gym, bar, party, etc), it's OK.
IMAGE IMAGE IMAGE
Women on the other hand..... not so much...
I have to say that normally that wouldn't bother me, my mom would tell me I don't look so hot from time to time.
however, he literally just walked into my house unannounced and i found it complety rude to greet someone that way.
yes it was kind of a joke, so now it over and we were chatting like always before he left.
i just didn't expect it.
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| Posted 1/21/08 9:46 AM |
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HeatherRose
Life is Good :)
Member since 11/07 6605 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by saraH
its my bil and while we are friendly with one another, we are not that close.
i don't think its nice, but i do know a few people who would do that, and thats just their personality, so I wouldn't take what they said to heart.
If it was said, I would try to say thanks, you've looked like sh!t since the day i met you, but i didn't think i needed to mention it.
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| Posted 1/21/08 9:48 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
if you don't think it's appropriate, then hell no it isn't.
if you think someone overstepped a boundary. then they did.
especially if it's a man and you just had a baby....tell him to talk to you after passing a gall stone
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| Posted 1/21/08 9:49 AM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Is it ever appropriate
Posted by Ophelia
if you don't think it's appropriate, then hell no it isn't.
if you think someone overstepped a boundary. then they did.
especially if it's a man and you just had a baby....tell him to talk to you after passing a gall stone
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| Posted 1/21/08 9:50 AM |
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