How do you know when the right time is?

I figured since many lurkers are introducing themselves, I would do the same. My name is Katie and DH and I are thinking about starting to TTC. I just went off BC pills this month. If it was up to DH, we would TTC this coming cycle. Sometimes I think we should too, then other times I think we should wait until January. There are many reasons why January would be better for us to start, but I keep going back and forth on starting now. These mixed feelings are driving me crazy. How do I know when the right time is...if there ever is a right time?

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

I'm not sure there ever is a "right time".

DH and I talked about it and I was hesitant at first b/c we had 3 weddings this summer and were going to be traveling a lot. We eventually decided to start to TTC anyway. I'm glad we did. We're currently in our 4th month trying.
Feel free to FM me if you'd like or if you have any questions!

Good luck to you!

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

I don't know if there's ever an "ideal" time to TTC or to have a baby. You just have to know in your heart that this is what you want.

Keep in mind that you NEVER know how long it can take to get pregnant. Some get pregnant in the first month, some take years to get pregnant.

I have wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember. We waited until we got married and got a little "baby fund" started. We are in our 12th month TTC and we are glad that we started trying right away since we never imagined it would take this long.

Best of luck with your decision

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

You really just can't predict how long it will take for it to happen, so if you think you are ready, I wouldn't delay starting b/c you think January will be more ideal. If you start now you may very well get pregnant in January!

Someone told me this last spring when I told them we were going to start over the summer b/c it was more ideal than spring.....I heard them, but in my mind, I just thought I would get pregnant right away and that would be it (I think we all do to an extent when we start!)

Anyway, I conceived right away, miscarried and here we are, still trying. I wish I had just started as soon as I knew I wanted to, and not tried to control it so much...

Good luck with your decision!

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

my honest opinion on this is that with life, you never know...

like many of the girls said - you have no idea if you'll be one of the luck ones, 10 posts and BLAMMO- BFP annoucnement....or if you'll be here for 10,000 posts and on the Infertility board 2 years later...

i guess the only way you know you're ready is if you can mentally see yourself with a child. For me - i have had that image since i was 16 years old.

Like Maybeamommy - i'm glad that i pushed Dave to start a little earlier than we planned. We were originally SUPPOSED to start trying in August (we were married in December)...but i pushed for March and here we sit in August - about to go on our honeymoon....a trip i had prayed to be pregnant for..

if you waited until the time was perfect for everything, think of all the opportunities that may've passed you by..

i think i've ranted enough :) I hope this helps in some way!

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

Thank you all for your honest responses. I completely agree that there probably never is a perfect time. I dream of having babies, so why wait until January right? If I am one of the lucky ones, and I get pregnant quickly, we can make it work. I'm a little scared though. I assume that's normal.

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

Posted by katie629

Thank you all for your honest responses. I completely agree that there probably never is a perfect time. I dream of having babies, so why wait until January right? If I am one of the lucky ones, and I get pregnant quickly, we can make it work. I'm a little scared though. I assume that's normal.

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

we decided when we noticed all we did was talk about our future baby, and how wonderful life would be so i guess that made us notice we were ready

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

I was ready before DH was and though it was only a couple of months after we got married when we started to TTC, I felt it CRITICAL fo us to be on the same page as to when we started.

We were both a little older when we go married (35 and 36) AND YES we ended up having issues that qualified me to become a poster/member on the IF board for a period of time. We had no idea what our fate was to be, but it didnt matter. We had to BOTH be ready.

If DH was not ready to TTC, then the IF journey would have been a hell of a lot more difficult and full of a different kind of despair. It is my opinion that BOTH people have to be prepared and ready.

Message edited 8/24/2008 2:18:00 PM.

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

Posted by maybeamommy

Posted by Goldi0218

If DH was not ready to TTC, then the IF journey would have been a hell of a lot more difficult and full of a different kind of dispair. It is my opinion that BOTH people have to be prepared and ready.

That is a really great point! I never even thought of it that way.

We were both ready when we started, although I felt a little more "into it" than DH. Now, 12 months later, we both are willing to do anything to get pregnant, and DH has been completely onboard and willing to discuss IF and consider various treatments.

Just wanted to say that was a great point that you made and I want to remember that one since this question is asked all of the time on here!

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

The time is nver "right" persay, but you AND DH both have to be ready.

Only you two know what is right for both of you. Good Luck

As afr as me n DH, we both wanted to TTC after we got married last year. I am 32 and he is 36, and our DD is 7 already, so for us right away was the perfect time.

I thought I would get PG right away, but alas I have not and it has been almost 1 year.

Re: How do you know when the right time is?

Both of you have to be ready. We both felt that there was something missing and we knew we both weren't getting any younger