I can't believe I have such a horrible Pookie update. Things have been going so well since her first chemo treatment last week. I never thought I'd say this but it seems that there's a worse enemy than the cancer right now - congestive heart failure. She's been so great and last night her breathing was loud but seemed ok and today it was very labored and her whole body was going into her breathing. I took her to the vet this afternoon and that's the diagnosis after the chest x-ray - also - fluid in the lungs (from the heart failure) which is why the breathing is so difficult. Vet wanted to do an ultrasound to see what was going on further and she just called - it's really bad - bother sides of her poor heart aren't pumping correctly. So right now it's wait and see what happens in the next 24hours and if she responds to the medication they're giving her. Even if she responds and we put her on medication, most babies with her prognosis live 3-4 months and she's at risk for a stroke. I just can't handle this. Just agreed with the dr. over the phone to have a DNR order if something happens immediately overnight. They will call tonight if they see things go downhill. I can't stop crying and I can't stop thinking that I didn't get to hug or kiss her because I thought they were bringing her back out to me after they took her in to assess her. I can't believe this is how she is going to go - not at home with us. The cancer would be so much better at this point
I honestly just don't know how much more I can take - so much $hit going on - boss illegally excessed my job on Friday - going to get really ugly with union and possible lawsuit.
Pookie was supposed to be here for the baby in Jan and now I don't know if she even will be.
The cancer would be so much better at this point
