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RayRay13
LIF Infant
Member since 7/14 155 total posts
Name:
RayRay
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Godparents
Hi everyone,
So...I'm in a bind. Not quite sure what to do and I need some opinions. My husband and I aren't super religious, but I think it's important to baptize my girls. My daughter was baptized and her godparents are my sister, her husband and my husbands sister. That was an easy choice....
Now, I'm having my 2nd daughters baptism and I'm not sure what to do. I have another sister who is not involved in our lives at all. We see her for holidays only. I have 3 1st cousins (girls) who are very involved with my family, love my kids, etc. I have older cousins (married couple) who have always been there for my husband and I, but have little involvement with my kids unless I call them and we ask them to come by. And then we have our best friends - a girl I've known since we were 5 and a guy my husband has been close with for decades.
Here's the drama....big Italian family... I can't have my 3 1st cousins without my sister because it would be a "slap in the face" to her. (my mothers words). I love my older cousins, but they're not really involved with my kids.
I don't know what to do...and no matter who I chose, I know there will be drama and I'll feel like I made the wrong decision.
I could use your advice.
Thanks so much!
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Posted 10/31/16 12:56 PM  |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
I would pick your close friend. This way they can't say anything if you picked one of your cousins vs. your sister.
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| Posted 10/31/16 1:00 PM |
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IUIGirl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/14 852 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
Posted by JDubs
I would pick your close friend. This way they can't say anything if you picked one of your cousins vs. your sister.
This!
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| Posted 10/31/16 1:02 PM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
choose your sister. you arent religious. its not like you will expecting the godparent to take them to church and give them spiritual guidance.
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| Posted 10/31/16 1:02 PM |
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NewlyMrs
Laugh-Live-Love LIFE!
Member since 10/06 14432 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Godparents
I'd pick the friend too. IMO, if you're choosing to Baptize, then choose a Godparent who will be there for your child.
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| Posted 10/31/16 1:03 PM |
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chris605
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Member since 5/05 3206 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
IMO, I would pick the person who is involved in your daughters life the most. I have a sister who isn't and when it came time to pick god-parents I chose my Cousin - Why because she was an active part of our lives.
Honestly seems no matter what you do it will not be the right choice for THEM but what matters is whats the right choice for your daughter...
Go with your heart.... Seems your friend is the better choice...
GOOD LUCK...
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| Posted 10/31/16 1:17 PM |
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Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
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Godparents
If your sister isn't involved in the kid's life, she probably doesn't even want to be a godparent and would be relieved not to be selected for it.
(but of course that person would never say that out loud.)
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| Posted 10/31/16 2:13 PM |
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tagkit
LIF Infant
Member since 10/12 361 total posts
Name:
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Godparents
Go with your heart...speaking from experience , I have always tried making others happy or doing the right thing bc of "family" , in the end you still get screwed. Pick the best person you want in your child's life!
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| Posted 10/31/16 2:19 PM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Godparents
Posted by tagkit
Go with your heart...speaking from experience , I have always tried making others happy or doing the right thing bc of "family" , in the end you still get screwed. Pick the best person you want in your child's life!
This
You will never make everyone happy.
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| Posted 10/31/16 2:29 PM |
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pumpkinmom
LIF Adult
Member since 5/12 2912 total posts
Name:
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Godparents
I would pick your sister. It's not like you're estranged from her or think she's a bad example to your child. If you prefer to pick a cousin, I would pick ONE of them.
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| Posted 10/31/16 3:07 PM |
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Jennifer
Happy
Member since 5/05 4230 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
My cousin used the same godparents for all 3 of her kids.
Maybe that can be an option.
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| Posted 10/31/16 3:14 PM |
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Eunyboo
<3
Member since 7/12 4376 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: Godparents
Use whomever is in their life. My parents chose my father's brother and his wife and they're not friendly. They don't even talk anymore. I missed out on the typical "godparent" relationship.
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| Posted 10/31/16 3:43 PM |
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nycbuslady
LIF Adult
Member since 9/15 1070 total posts
Name:
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Godparents
I'm actually confused as why your older DD has 3 godparents. In the Catholic church it's only two - - one male and one female. Or, at a minimum, just one. But I agree with having all kids with the same godparents. My sisters and I all have the same godparents and it's nice.
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| Posted 10/31/16 6:54 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
Posted by nycbuslady
I'm actually confused as why your older DD has 3 godparents. In the Catholic church it's only two - - one male and one female. Or, at a minimum, just one. But I agree with having all kids with the same godparents. My sisters and I all have the same godparents and it's nice.
I was wondering the same.
I would go with your friend. No brainer to me.
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| Posted 10/31/16 7:13 PM |
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RayRay13
LIF Infant
Member since 7/14 155 total posts
Name:
RayRay
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Re: Godparents
My daughter was baptized in a Lutheran Church, not Catholic. There was a very good reason at the time for us to chose 3 Godparents.
Message edited 11/1/2016 12:17:59 AM.
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| Posted 11/1/16 12:15 AM |
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MamaBear2
LIF Infant
Member since 1/16 233 total posts
Name:
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Re: Godparents
Posted by tagkit
Go with your heart...speaking from experience , I have always tried making others happy or doing the right thing bc of "family" , in the end you still get screwed. Pick the best person you want in your child's life!
This exactly. My DH has a large family and it was so hard when it came to picking Godparents. There is always going to be drama, do what YOU want, and do not try to make everyone happy.
My DD has 2 Godmothers and one Godfather also. One is listed as the Godmother and the other is a witness. (I think those were the terms they used in the Church).
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| Posted 11/1/16 12:02 PM |
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lorich
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Member since 6/05 9987 total posts
Name:
Grammie says "Lora Gina"
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Re: Godparents
I would either go with your friend or the same Godparents as your other child.
There is nothing wrong with having the same Godparents.
I get how stressful this can get - especially when the grandparents put in their two cents. My MIL couldn't understand why I didn't want my atheist SIL to be my son's Godmother. I don't think she understood the reason of a Godparent.
So in the end my son was baptized with NO Godparents....and this was perfectly acceptable.
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| Posted 11/1/16 12:08 PM |
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JP826
=)
Member since 9/06 10903 total posts
Name:
Me!! All about ME!
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Re: Godparents
Posted by tagkit
Go with your heart...speaking from experience , I have always tried making others happy or doing the right thing bc of "family" , in the end you still get screwed. Pick the best person you want in your child's life!
THIS!
I come from an Italian family as well, so I know the deal. My mother wanted me to chose my sister who is an ATHIEST. Um, no. I wasn't putting on a show for anyone because that was "the traditional" thing to do. My mother got over it real quickly. And honestly, my sister couldn't care less.
Message edited 11/2/2016 9:38:29 AM.
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| Posted 11/2/16 9:37 AM |
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