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Funny fer ya

Posted By Message

Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05

32475 total posts

Name:
Susan

Funny fer ya

When girls don't put out!!
This was written by a guy...it's pretty damn smart.

Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.


Alright Ladies. Forward this if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, forward it anyway.

Men, forward this if you have BALLS !!!!

Posted 1/14/08 2:48 PM
 
Long Island Weddings
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!

Member since 5/05

13659 total posts

Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 2:50 PM
 

GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!

Member since 11/06

26792 total posts

Name:
Shawn

Re: Funny fer ya

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I LOVED it!!!!!

Posted 1/14/08 2:51 PM
 

igottabeme
Its peanut butter jelly time!

Member since 1/08

2340 total posts

Name:
Wouldnt you like to know! ;)

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 2:57 PM
 

headoverheels
s'il vous plaît

Member since 6/07

42079 total posts

Name:
LB

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 2:58 PM
 

TreAnt427
-

Member since 8/06

8652 total posts

Name:
Tracy

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 3:05 PM
 

CroatianBride
Our Angel Ivanka Rose <3

Member since 7/07

2031 total posts

Name:
Tat

Re: Funny fer ya

That is great!

Posted 1/14/08 3:06 PM
 

sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!

Member since 10/05

20369 total posts

Name:
Jesss, duh.

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 3:07 PM
 

BellaRock
I am all the Me I will ever Be

Member since 5/06

9746 total posts

Name:
She who shall remain nameless

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 3:08 PM
 

PotofLuck06
Our Baby Boy Is Here!!!

Member since 11/06

13241 total posts

Name:
Betsy

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 3:17 PM
 

JenMarie
One day at a time

Member since 11/07

7397 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Funny fer ya

I've read that before. It's awesome!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/08 3:24 PM
 

glinda-goodwitch
:-)

Member since 7/06

9149 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Funny fer ya

OMG, that was so cute! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/08 3:34 PM
 

Dani922
Here's to new beginnings

Member since 10/07

7260 total posts

Name:
Danielle

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 4:53 PM
 

Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man

Member since 2/06

3235 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 5:16 PM
 

LightUpOurLife
Totally in love

Member since 8/06

12785 total posts

Name:
Bonnie-Jean

Re: Funny fer ya

VERY funny!

Posted 1/14/08 5:18 PM
 

SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!

Member since 3/06

32345 total posts

Name:

Re: Funny fer ya

PIMP!!!!!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/08 7:08 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: Funny fer ya

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Posted 1/14/08 7:34 PM
 
 

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