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Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

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maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

..So I found out I'm having third baby Chat Icon

I am over the moon. So is DH. We love our boys and can't wait for another. And that is all that should matter, I know that..

But it's really funny how other people say some really upsetting things..like "god help you" or "ugh i'm so sorry it wasn't a girl". I am shocked to hear these things..i've never expressed desire one way or another, only that I'd be THRILLED to welcome another son. Maybe I'm naive and I'll be in for it some day, but I have such incredibly sweet boys that are so much fun. I don't feel I'm missing out...but others almost WANT me to feel that way.

Anyways, it's just a little vent. This baby is already very much loved and special to us. Why don't people see past gender...it's so weird to me. We have this little being joining our family and I truly believe it's meant to be.

Vent over...I need to concentrate on my happiness, but you would think I told people the worst news ever!! (not everyone is like this, thank god my family is happy)

Message edited 2/21/2013 3:36:15 PM.

Posted 2/21/13 3:27 PM
 
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JsWife
His laugh, Her smile

Member since 12/06

2902 total posts

Name:
Patricia

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..

Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/13 3:31 PM
 

wo0shply
LIF Adult

Member since 11/08

2702 total posts

Name:
Tass

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..

congrats on your Chat Icon

as you know some people just dont have filters. Dont let them get to you. As long as you and your family are happy that's all that matters!

Posted 2/21/13 3:36 PM
 

aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys

Member since 4/06

11426 total posts

Name:
Ali

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

i have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon's. I LOVE my boys.

We want a 3rd baby maybe sometime next year.

I was going through my 2nd sons clothes and i said to my husband that i hope we have a 3rd boy (for many reasons).

People always ask if we're going for the Chat Icon and no we're not. Not at all!

We're going for #3. It has nothing to do with the gender. Even if you were to tell me that i was 100% having a boy, i'd still go for the 3rd.

I would LOVE 3 boys. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I can't explain it. I would not be any bit disappointed if i didn't have a girl.

So i get where you are coming from. Chat Icon

Message edited 2/21/2013 3:42:07 PM.

Posted 2/21/13 3:40 PM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by aliwnec10

i have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon's. I LOVE my boys.

We want a 3rd baby maybe sometime next year.

I was going through my 2nd sons clothes and i said to my husband that i hope we have a 3rd boy (for many reasons).

People always ask if we're going for the Chat Icon and no we're not. Not at all!

We're going for #3. It has nothing to do with the gender.

Although i would LOVE 3 boys. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

So i get where you are coming from. Chat Icon



Ahhhhh another lady who loves having boys, lol! SO REFRESHING!! lol!!

When I found out I was having a third baby boy, I smiled...I went upstairs to the nursery and was looking at the beautiful blue knit blankets my mom made my boys, and was so happy I get to wrap another baby in them.

I would have been thrilled with a girl as well, but it truly did not matter to me. We also suffered a loss (ectopic) back in october and I was very very sick after it (blood loss). I am just so thankful for this baby. i'm glad you "get it" too!

Posted 2/21/13 3:42 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54921 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

And if you had found out it was a girl they would have said- "oh you don't knw what you are in for- the DRAMA with girls!" "girls are more difficult than boys!" "Wait till she's a teenager!" "good luck with that!"
Etc Etc

Because some people don't have a filter and they can NEVER just be happy for you.
NEVER.

Brush it off. Don't even listen.

Congrat on the Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/13 3:44 PM
 

Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!

Member since 8/05

14470 total posts

Name:
Veronica

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I always wanted a boy LOL

I love my daughter..

But just think.. fast forward..
Three gown handsome boys in your kitchen talking about that first one who's getting married.. how will Mom take it (all while they dont know you can hear) How the three of them as pre teens will sit over a cake and try to decorate it saying "Happy Mother's Day Mom" with boyish grins and frosting all over.

Boys.. awesomeness!

Remember no matter what others think.. they can't imagine the love you feel in the circle of your own children (be it one, all the same sex, with special needs or not)

This is how I feel when people question my one and doneness... i imagine my teen daughter and I eating ice cream while complaining about an ex boyfriend of hers. That moment before she walks down the aisle. And sure even that punk kid screaming at me through the door. She's mine. No one else gets to be there but me. And *I* am just happy enough, thank you very much.

Posted 2/21/13 3:46 PM
 

aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys

Member since 4/06

11426 total posts

Name:
Ali

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by maybebaby

Posted by aliwnec10

i have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon's. I LOVE my boys.

We want a 3rd baby maybe sometime next year.

I was going through my 2nd sons clothes and i said to my husband that i hope we have a 3rd boy (for many reasons).

People always ask if we're going for the Chat Icon and no we're not. Not at all!

We're going for #3. It has nothing to do with the gender.

Although i would LOVE 3 boys. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

So i get where you are coming from. Chat Icon



Ahhhhh another lady who loves having boys, lol! SO REFRESHING!! lol!!

When I found out I was having a third baby boy, I smiled...I went upstairs to the nursery and was looking at the beautiful blue knit blankets my mom made my boys, and was so happy I get to wrap another baby in them.

I would have been thrilled with a girl as well, but it truly did not matter to me. We also suffered a loss (ectopic) back in october and I was very very sick after it (blood loss). I am just so thankful for this baby. i'm glad you "get it" too!



I love my boys. I was never disappointed that #2 wasn't a girl. Not even a shred. I had to see an RE to get pregnant with #2 (although my issue was minor) but like you... i was just so thankful that i could have another.

I just think i'm meant to have boys. Chat Icon I have 3 older brothers and i was never one to play with barbies so maybe that's why. I played with matchbox cars. Chat Icon

I really hope we get to reuse all my boys clothes again. Especially there are a few items we didn't even get a chance to use. And i love seeing my 2nd wear my oldests clothes. It brings back such great memories.

Posted 2/21/13 3:50 PM
 

mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!

Member since 3/09

8585 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Congrats on your Chat Icon !! I heard ridiculous comments when we found out we were having our second Chat Icon A co-worker told my dh he felt bad for him because all he would hear was whining for the rest of his life. People are rude, people don't think before they talk, and in the end none of it matters. Enjoy your Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon and just ignore all the rude people and comments!

Message edited 2/21/2013 3:52:55 PM.

Posted 2/21/13 3:52 PM
 

bpmom
Feeling Blessed

Member since 6/07

2963 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I am a proud mama to Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon and I believe I wrote a very similar post to the OP's back in 2011 when we found out #3 was a boy.

There's nothing like being the mom to brothers. Chat Icon The sweetness, the rough-and-tumble, the frogs in their pockets, the toy trucks and cars everywhere...I feel those special moments between you and each of your sons and those among your three boys will help keep you smiling when well-intentioned people make rude comments like the ones OP has heard already.

I feel I need to warn you, though -- the comments don't stop. My oldest is almost 5 and on days he's in pre-school I take the younger two out and about. People notice me with them and say I have my hands full, wow - you must be so busy and tired, geez, how do you do this all day, etc....then my 3yo tells them his big brother is at school and then the other comments come out, "Poor mommy, wishes she had a girl." "Wow - all you make are boys." Just keep smiling back. Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/13 3:54 PM
 

babydreaming
LIF Adult

Member since 3/07

1130 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Congratulations on your baby Chat Icon !

I have a Chat Icon and Chat Icon . I imagined I would have 2 boys (or 3 boys) my entire life. When I found out that I was a having a girl with my second, I was beyond shocked. Never imagined a girl...always thought boys. I was actually confused (sounds weird) on what to do with a girl. I LOVE my baby girl and now can't imagine my life without her but there is something about my son.

How wonderful that you will have 3 sons! Enjoy them and forget what people say.

Posted 2/21/13 3:57 PM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Thanks everyone Chat Icon

It's just hard sometimes to hear negative comments. My life is very much complete having sons...I have two boys right now that hug me and tell me "im the most beautifulest mom in the world" and that's enough for me!! They better keep it up! Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/13 4:04 PM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by mnmsoinlove

Congrats on your Chat Icon !! I heard ridiculous comments when we found out we were having our second Chat Icon A co-worker told my dh he felt bad for him because all he would hear was whining for the rest of his life. People are rude, people don't think before they talk, and in the end none of it matters. Enjoy your Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon and just ignore all the rude people and comments!



People LOVE to tell my BIL that he is doomed with two girls and they feel bad he doesn't have a son..it's ridiculous. He loves his girls so much, he is such a good dad to them and i told him to ignore the negative stuff and concentrate on the good (he was a little sad to not have a son, but i told him we can swap so we each get out fill, lol). I need to take my own positive advice!!

Posted 2/21/13 4:05 PM
 

violet25
LIF Infant

Member since 8/12

101 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

my MIL has Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon . She did hope #3 was a Chat Icon but she loooves her boys! and the relationship my DH and his brothers have is amazing. they are so close, they have so much fun together, and they have the best relationship. DH loves having two brothers. and they love their mama!

Posted 2/21/13 4:07 PM
 

Superkat
More a stranger than a friend

Member since 5/06

9730 total posts

Name:
K

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by aliwnec10

i have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon's. I LOVE my boys.

We want a 3rd baby maybe sometime next year.

I was going through my 2nd sons clothes and i said to my husband that i hope we have a 3rd boy (for many reasons).

People always ask if we're going for the Chat Icon and no we're not. Not at all!

We're going for #3. It has nothing to do with the gender. Even if you were to tell me that i was 100% having a boy, i'd still go for the 3rd.

I would LOVE 3 boys. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I can't explain it. I would not be any bit disappointed if i didn't have a girl.

So i get where you are coming from. Chat Icon



I could echo most of this except I think we are done at 2. I love my two sons and I would have no problems with having a third son!

Posted 2/21/13 4:13 PM
 

OverTheMoon
LIF Infant

Member since 8/12

80 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I always say it'd be nice to have a girl one day but if we get a brood of all boys just like my DS, I'll be thrilled. Small minds often = loud mouths. I think it's so wonderful - congratulations on your third blessing! Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/13 4:26 PM
 

Chai77
Brighter days ahead

Member since 4/07

7364 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I can only imagine! I have two boys and get those types of sympathetic looks and comments too "You only make boys I guess, it's too bad." People are so rude. All that matters is that you are happy!

Posted 2/21/13 4:32 PM
 

Annie91606
Brotherly love

Member since 12/07

1816 total posts

Name:
Anne

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I think it is wonderful that you are having a third boy!!! Congrats to you.

I have two amazing boys- ages 5 and 2. They are best friends. People tell us to try for a girl. I feel like you hear comments no matter what you do!

When idiots say things, my response is " I have the family I always wanted". Which is true. All I wanted was to be a mom- didn't matter how many or what gender!

Posted 2/21/13 4:34 PM
 

tryin4baby3
LIF Toddler

Member since 8/12

425 total posts

Name:

Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

I have the exact opposite situation. I am having my third girl and get upset/defensive when people ask if we will try again for a boy, if we're disappointed or say they wish this one was a boy, etc. I love love love being a girl mommy and am so psyched to be having 3 girls. When we found out number 2 was a girl mil stomped her foot and said shucks. People come up to me and say they hope this one is a boy and I say actually it's a girl and I am thrilled. People will say what they say but I couldn't be happier and as my girls grow up, I'll make sure they know how happy I am to be a girl mommy x 3!

Posted 2/21/13 4:35 PM
 

Christine2
LIF Adult

Member since 2/09

1217 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

People say the most hurtful things...and i can't understand if they mean to be hurtful or not? I got plenty of sympathy looks when I said I was due with DD#2, plenty of "Poor DH!" and the best, a text that said "congrats?"

Posted 2/21/13 4:44 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

My SIL is pregnant with #3 right now. She and my brother have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon
I think deep down, she wants another Chat Icon
My sister also has two Chat Icon Chat Icon
I have one of each.
If DD was a Chat Icon , I'd be just as happy!
I LOVE all my nephews.

People just don't think before they speak. It's 2013. You'd *think* people would be better these days. So annoying.

Posted 2/21/13 5:22 PM
 

missus-hbradio
Twin mommy

Member since 5/05

15857 total posts

Name:

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

People have something to say no matter what. I have twins, a boy and a girl. People like to say "oh perfect family". Um, no. My family would be "perfect" had I gave birth to 2 girls or 2 boys as well.

Posted 2/21/13 5:24 PM
 

gni1125
LIF Infant

Member since 7/06

246 total posts

Name:
Irene

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by aliwnec10

i have 2 Chat Icon Chat Icon's. I LOVE my boys.

We want a 3rd baby maybe sometime next year.

I was going through my 2nd sons clothes and i said to my husband that i hope we have a 3rd boy (for many reasons).

People always ask if we're going for the Chat Icon and no we're not. Not at all!

We're going for #3. It has nothing to do with the gender. Even if you were to tell me that i was 100% having a boy, i'd still go for the 3rd.

I would LOVE 3 boys. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I can't explain it. I would not be any bit disappointed if i didn't have a girl.

So i get where you are coming from. Chat Icon




You took the words out of my mouth! I also have two boys and would love another one. They are so sweet and funny I can't imagine not having another boy at this point. I think for the most part people project their own feelings on others and assume that's how you would feel about not having both genders. I would love nothing more than to just have HEALTHY babies. Period.

Posted 2/21/13 5:26 PM
 

want2beamom
Love my boys soooo much!!!

Member since 8/06

10164 total posts

Name:
True love doesn't end with happily ever after...

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

i have 4 boys Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon and I have encountered are you going for the girl from my mail lady, cashiers at the store, my ped...almost everyone...if only they could understand my love for my boys, they would never ask that question...people just dont undertstand (but I doChat Icon boys are amazing!!!)

Posted 2/21/13 5:33 PM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: Feeling a little sad about something..(comments about gender)

Posted by want2beamom

i have 4 boys Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon and I have encountered are you going for the girl from my mail lady, cashiers at the store, my ped...almost everyone...if only they could understand my love for my boys, they would never ask that question...people just dont undertstand (but I doChat Icon boys are amazing!!!)



Exactly. If people knew how I felt, they prob wouldn't question it...I make it pretty apparent by saying "oh no, we're thrilled! I'd have ten boys if i could" and they just look at me like I'm crazy, lol...

I'm told by teachers all the time how polite and sweet my boys are. I tell them that the Irish don't take any BS!! Lol. Seriously, they are good kids and i pray it stays that way!!

Posted 2/21/13 5:56 PM
 
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