Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I've always been somewhat uncomfortable with the idea of BF, but still decided that I will try to BF my My motto in life has always been it's better to try then fail than to never have tried at all... so I went out and bought some nursing gear and supplies yesterday for my hospital bag.
... now I am having doubts again. I guess I am just very emotional right now with all the crazy hormons, but am so torn about this, it makes me want to cry when I think about it.

My mom did not BF me or my brother, both of us turned out fine, never have any healthy issues (knock on wood).

I know BF vs. FF is a touchy subject, but I could really use some advice and your honest opinions of the pros & cons. Please feel free to FM me.

Q? Who would be appropriate for me to discuss this? My OB or the pediatrician?

TIA!

ETA: I will also be pumping so DH can feed DD too.

Message edited 12/30/2008 8:29:48 PM.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I can totally understand your thoughts.

I was not BF, Im "normal".
I however am going to give it a shot, for the obvious reasons and its FREE!! I also am not going to panic and loose sleep if it does not work out I will simple go to FF. Oh and yeah Im sure you will get WAY different opinions on it from both sides. You need to do what is best for you and YOUR baby. GL I would talk to your ob about it and then maybe a ped.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Im sure there are many, many pros to it, but it is just not something I have ever felt comfortable doing.

I will be FF my new little one.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I think you were just reading my mind because this was gonna be my next post. Im not the most comfortable with my body as result of being raped years ago.. i thought i was pretty much over it but lately i have clammed up again regarding being comfortable with my body. I want to try so hard to BF because i have heard of all the positive things but then fear not being successful at it. Or if i decide not to i know people will have their thoughts as well. SO To all who respond help me too. Im so torn My DH is comfortable either way and just wants me to be happy. I know if i cant relax and be comfortable with the idea it makes it all that much more difficult.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Posted by nov04libride
I also want my DH to have the pleasure of sharing equally in the feedings, and that is most easily done FF. I also believe from what I've read that FF babies are able to sleep longer since they consume more formula. I was FF, DH was FF, my brother was FF...I'm also going back to work, and believe it will make life easier if I don't have to pump and dump, freeze BM, worry about leaking through in meetings, etc. I'm also looking forward to not worrying about what I drink/eat/medicines I take, etc., affecting the baby.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Posted by MrsJM
These are some of my concerns too - returning to work and how will that be like, have to run off to pump throughout the day? Always have to watch what I eat, drink and what if I am get sick and have to take medication? Crack, bleeding nipples and I've heard how painful the drying up process can be....

ugh

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I don't love the idea of breastfeeding-- but I am totally going to do it. The health benefits from what I understand are so great for me and the baby that I can't just not try it.

I was not breast fed as my mom says-- it was just not done then. She didn't know anyone who breast fed. Jury is still out on how normal I am though!

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

It is a hard decision i understand. i am only going to share my experience and opinions on it. this is not to sway you in any way. first, i was totally uncertain about BFing my DD. i am the most modest person in the world. very private, shy etc. i didn't like the idea of using my body to feed another human being. i know that sounds ridiculous but thats how i felt. however, my sister was so successful in BFing her 5 children i thought-i'll just give it a try. and i did. just tried, didn't pressure myself, and gave myself small goals. i said i'd try for a month. when DD came, she latched on immediately and i never looked back much to my own shock! it felt totally fine, totally normal. i won't lie it was one of the hardest things i ever did those first 3 months or so. i was the only one who could feed her and i hated pumping with a passion. it is a huge responsibility. i was surprised by that honestly. however, i look back and see that this was just a small part of my life that i gave to my DD. i BF'd almost a year. and believe me, it got so easy as the months went on. once she was eating solids and all. it is the single best thing i ever did. for us it was an amazing bonding that i do not believe i would have achieved in another way. i felt it was the best thing i could do for her and i wouldn't change a thing. whatever you choose to do, it will be the right thing and you'll know it! good luck!

Message edited 12/30/2008 8:49:59 PM.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

These are some of my concerns too - returning to work and how will that be like, have to run off to pump throughout the day? Always have to watch what I eat, drink and what if I am get sick and have to take medication? Crack, bleeding nipples and I've heard how painful the drying up process can be....

ugh

just a little side note on the cracked nipples and all-if your baby is latching correctly this will not happen. yes, there will be minor soreness but it is very transient. again, this is if baby latches right. i never had cracked or sore nipples. and when i did have to go on meds for being sick, i simply stopped BFing without any problems. the drying up wasn't that bad and was over quickly. the one thing i cannot help you out with and agree with is returning to work and pumping-that is hard and takes tons of dedication. i hated to pump so i shouldn't be the one to comment on this!

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

It sounds like you are doing the right thing by trying it. Maybe you will enjoy the experience more than you even think!

For me, I didn't really know many people that did it but I always knew that I wanted to...somehow. I experienced some of what you are concerned about but made it through. I did have a crevice (forget a little crack) that developed down one of my nipples. DD did not have a correct latch on one side, whether it was the way I held her on that side or what have you. I took care of it though and it cleared up within a few weeks. Sore nipples....had 'em...again due to incorrect latch. Managed my way through that too. Back to work at 4 months, pumped 2x a day at work. Not so bad! Then at 7 months DD started to refuse me so I exclusively pumped 6x a day until she was 11.5 months. Then I was pumping 3x a day at work and 3x at home.

Was it all a lot of work...heck ya! Honestly though, it just became part of my daily routine. It was not a hardship to me at all. I enjoyed it---even when it was difficult.

I am not trying to sell you on it, just sharing my experience. FF babies do seem to sleep longer stretches of time....I won't lie. DD was up every 2.5-3 hours for the first 3 months. That is definitely one pro for formula. BF is free so there's one pro for BFing. With BFing, I dropped weight like crazy. I was burning up more calories than I could possibly consume. I was down to pre-pregnancy weight in no time.

Really though...you will hear lots of stories. You need to just do what is comfortable and manageable for you. Forget what others think of your decision. If you want to try it, I think that's great. If you don't want to, then I think that is the best decision for you.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I will be perfectly honest with you. I wanted nothing more than to BF my daughter and I gave it 110% but unfortunately it didn't go as planned. I didn't produce enough milk, Emerson lost too much weight, we had to supplement with formula while I pumped and then in the end she went exclusively to formula. I tell you this because it was exhausting, frustrating, and emotionally draining at times trying to BF due to the fact I didn't have enough milk and simply from the both of us learning what to do. Therefore, if you're heart is not 100% into it maybe it's better to go with your gut and use the formula. Of course it can't hurt to try and everyone has a different experience with BF'ing but I know for me it was a trying experience even though I enjoyed the time bonding with her. Whatever you choose to do you're baby will be fine and healthy. Emerson is doing wonderful on the formula and it's what was best for her in the end.

Message edited 12/30/2008 9:16:04 PM.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I know for myself I have decided not to. Initially, I was going to try when I thought I was going to be home for about 8 months, but due to seniority issues at work, I will be returning after approx. 10 weeks.

I know myself very well and I just know this is not something I can take on with work looming over me. I want to be able to adjust to having a baby without having to worry about taking on something else.

Whatever you decide, just trust in your decision. I think as new parents to be we can drive ourselves crazy with all of the choices and decisions to be made. We will all make great parents regardless of certain choices!!

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

DH has convinced me to at least try it

I am slowly reading a book about it and we are taking a class together at the hospital.

If anything- I know its healthier than formula and will help me lose weight

But I am terrified of all the pain women say it brings- nipples, engorgement etc

DH will be able to feed too because I plan on pumping

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

You have to do what feels comfortable for you. Having a newborn is soooo overwhelming and bf can be very stressful if it doesn't work out that easy. So if that is going to make you insane don't do it. If you feel strongly than give it a shot.

I had decided before my first that I wouldn't be BF. The lactition lady came in and made me feel horrible about my decision (along with some other people) and I was very depressed about it. I continued formula feeding and my son is perfect. With my second I requested that the lactition people not even come to my room. And anyone that had a comment about not BF I put in their place. I reminded them that MY child was being fed and taken care of by me.

I will not BF this one either.

Make the decision for yourself. Happy mommy=happy baby. Don't let ANYONE make you feel guilty no matter what you choose

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Posted by nov04libride

Posted by Jen2999

Im sure there are many, many pros to it, but it is just not something I have ever felt comfortable doing.

I will be FF my new little one.

Me too. I also want my DH to have the pleasure of sharing equally in the feedings, and that is most easily done FF. I also believe from what I've read that FF babies are able to sleep longer since they consume more formula. I was FF, DH was FF, my brother was FF...I'm also going back to work, and believe it will make life easier if I don't have to pump and dump, freeze BM, worry about leaking through in meetings, etc. I'm also looking forward to not worrying about what I drink/eat/medicines I take, etc., affecting the baby.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

Here I am 6 days before having my and still have no idea what the heck I'm doing about it and I've already been through it before so don't feel bad !!!...With my DS, he didnt latch - BF was never a necessity for me , if it worked fine, if not fine...I pumped and FF for 8 weeks ( pumping to me was a royal pain) and if I have to go that route again, i think I'd rather not...I "think" that if DC doesnt latch, FF it is- lactation consultant nazi's or not ...And to be even more honest, even if DC does latch, not sure how long I want to keep it up for...For me it certainly is not a bonding thing, in my eyes, my DS and I couldnt be any more attached to eachother and he was bottle fed from day one ...He barely ever was sick, so even that isnt a solid reason for me...BF is obviously less $$, and does help you to lose weight etc... but these are somewhat superficial reasons....I liked to have my DH share in the feedings, I felt it was important one on one time for them so that to me is a plus of bottle feeding...So we shall see what happens- Try not to have any expectations and see what works for you !

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

im gonna speak fron MY experience only..and everyone can have a different experience, but some people may share in this with me as well...

i had my ds when i was 21..i was sexually abused as a child for years, was overweight and very uncomfortable with my body..and my ex husband was so totally uncomfortable with me doing it as wello (niether of us were breastfed babies) i read one chapter of a book about it, and literally, had a panic attack, and threw up..
it was NOT for me...at the time...
my son was a big baby..he was formula fed only, and he ate ALOT..it was very expensive, he was EXTREMELY colicky, i changed formula SEVEN times..it was truly a pain in the butt, that i have no clue wouldve been easier if i wouldve just breastfed..
my son wasnt sick too much, hes got an EXTREMELY HIGH IQ...he is perfect in every way to me..
so when i got pregnant 10 years later..i looked back and decided my biggest goal in this pregnancy AND in raising my new lil girl, would be to make a list of everything i never did with my ds, that i at least looking back shouldve tried..

BFing was the FIRST thing on my list..
all this time later, i realize not only is it free, and not only am i giving my dd something that formula CAN NEVER GIVE in terms of nutrition..i am overcoming something that was so totally uncomfortable to me, which by the way is the most NATURAL thing in the planet,..and i find it saddening that women are forced to feel so taboo doing it..from friends, from family, from coworkers, from strangers..when my best friend pulls her shirt down to feed her child, youd think she was suffocating her baby the way some people stare at her..
im so totally prepared this time, to ignore the 'stigma' im so totally excited to give this gift to my dd, and as nervous as i feel inside, its the kind of nervousness i feel you take on when trying anything thats new..and usually those things are the most rewarding..
bottle fed or breastfed, your baby needs your love..and for you to be comfortable..they FEED off of THAT..
but my advice to anyone who asks this of themselves..is to really be honest with themselves what their reasoning is for either decision..
sometimes when you know WHY your choosing something, it helps you see if youre making the right choice..
good luck to all of you, youll come up with whatever is best for YOU..

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I am 150% uncomfortable with the idea of nursing the baby -
But b/c it's so improtant to DH, and it's suposedly SO good for the baby - I have agreed to pump and give the baby bottled breastmilk -
That's about as far as I can go .....

I KNOW everyone says puming is 10x harder than nursing, but it's not the time I'm concerned about, I'm just NOT comfortable with the idea of having this baby attached to me to eat - I know it's 'natural' - but it just isn't 'natural' to me ........

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I felt the same way - the concept of BFing freaked me out, and it still does, after having done it for 6 months with my DD. I had no intention of doing it until DH asked me to at least try.

So I decided I would TRY, but that was it - if I was uncomfortable, in too much pain or it was too difficult, I would stop immediately with no guilt and no remorse.

For us, amazingly it worked out - my daughter latched on like a champ and it came fairly easy for me. That's not to say those first few weeks aren't insanely difficult and nerve wracking, even when you have a good latch, but we found our groove and went with it.

That's just about the only advice I can give - if you are wavering back and forth, just commit then to trying it at the hospital and if it feels too weird, then move on without any pressure or feelings of guilt or remorse.

At the end of the day - a happy mommy = a happy baby - they can sense if you are uncomfortable or in pain, and it does no good to continue with something that makes you miserable, for yourself or for baby. Do what works for you - that's all that matters!

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I will not BF for many reasons. Some personal, some practical.

I don't think anyone other than DH should have any input or say into how we feed our child - although I know there will be plenty of opinions.

Does everyone get a visit from a lactation consultant? I am not wavering on my decision, so I would rather not have to deal with he/she at all.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

I felt the same way my entire pregnancy. The idea of breastfeeding made me super uncomfortable and I thought it wasn't for me. My plan was to breastfeed in the hospital and switch to exclusive pumping once I got home. Well, I ended up breastfeeding for 6 weeks and pumping afor a few weeks after. If my mother didn't get diagnosed with cancer I wouldn't have stopped (caused me major stress and supply to go down). I totally changed my mind about it once I gave it a try. it is a great bonding experience with DS and I really enjoyed it.
If I learned anything from my pregnancy, labor/delivery, and from bringing my baby home, it is to keep an open mind because things rarely go as planned. Give it a shot, you might enjoy it too.

Re: Does anyone else feel like this re:BF

DS is 2.5 weeks old and I'm EBFing. I also pumped after BFing at the beginning in order to build up a supply and to make sure DS was getting enough milk.

BFing has been tough. I'm up every few hours to feed him. There are times when he wants to nurse 20 minutes after he had stopped nursing. I don't really get much of a break. It has been pretty painful, especially for the first minute or so of latching. IMO, if you're not fully committed to BFing, you probably won't do it for long. Switching to formula has definitely crossed my mind at 3 am, but I'm trying to stick with it. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.