DH and disciplining....

I feel like my DH doesn't know how to dicipline. Like I'm the mean one, but it's funny bc they come to me more.
It's really my almost 4 yr old since my 20 month old doesn't get it yet besides showing him the right way.
I do timeouts when he doesn't listen or take toys away if he's not playing with it the right way.
He like doesn't know how to dicipline. I don't say too much bc I don't want to be the one to end up disciplining.
He firsts goes into to much detail then a little frustrated so it's like he bribes more to get DS to stop.
I try to explain and watch bc I see DS walks all over him. He knows he can get away with more with him.
Men... Lol
Not complaining about him at all. He's a great dad and helpful. He's just not around the boys as much so he just wants to have fun. He's had them for a day on the weekends, but like I said... More bribing

DH and disciplining....

Im bad cop. Always have been. I dont mind. I do look at dh sometimes like wtf? When ds is obviously being bad and he just watches it. Ds knows dh is a big pus with certain things, and def takes advantage of that. His theory is, he works so much, he doesnt want to yell during the times he is home. Whatever. Im not trying to be ds friend, im trying to raise a man who isnt a buttface when he grows up. Lol

Re: DH and disciplining....

its the same here!! I'm a SAHM right now- and i have no problem letting DS whine or throw his fits. He needs to learn that he can't have everything he wants.
DH on the other hand, doesn't deal well with the crying/whining- so he gives in more easily than i do.
Like if DS is whining for a snack while I'm making his lunch or dinner- I'll just let him scream or cry. He'll get over it LOL BUT Dh will hand him a snack or whatever hes asking for. IT makes it hard sometimes. But after seeing how IL are with DS, I see why DH does that. LOL ILs don't let DS get upset at all, give in, etc.... and I'm sure they were the same way when they were raising DH.
But we talked about and DH is gettign a little better with it.... so hopefully it keeps getting better!

Re: DH and disciplining....

I think they mom is usually always the bad guy. DH is ok with it. He tries but our kids are usually pretty good & if not, they usually start to behave with a warning.

Re: DH and disciplining....

yeah.. that was actually an interesting side benefit to my second job. During the xmas season I was out a LOT. So he had AJ to himself a LOT more. Now he gives her a look and she straightens up.

He got tired of her crap and realized his way was only making things worse. I couldn't help him because I wasn't around enough. I believe the discipline must be AT the time of infraction not later on. So I'd get home and he'd tell me at night what happened. I'd say "well then tell her no" LOL She wasn't a terror, she was just using him and he was running out of options. He told her no and that was that. He said it was a whole new experience. He learned to follow through and when to say something. He's actually improved a lot.

I'm no longer the ONLY bad guy, though I am still the main bad guy. Im home again a lot more so I'm trying not to let him get comfortable again.

Men.. they take the easy way when they can.