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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name:
Christina
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Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
We have a big italian Christmas Eve dinner every year. I have grown and married cousins with which we exchange gifts, but DH and I are the only ones with a child. I assumed three years ago when she was born that my cousins would just buy for her, and not for DH and I any longer. I was wrong! They buy for her, and for us! Which means I need to reciprocate with a larger gift.
Money is REALLY tight this year. I'd like to email my cousins to suggest that they just exchange between themselves and my daughter (and also suggest a price limit), but I'm worried that will seem like I'm trying to solicit gifts for my dd.
Is there a polite way to suggest that they just buy for my dd, and of course she will buy for them?
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Posted 10/25/15 10:49 AM  |
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MrsKR88
LIF Adult
Member since 2/10 979 total posts
Name:
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Could you maybe suggest doing a grab bag among the adults?
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| Posted 10/25/15 11:07 AM |
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stinger
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 4971 total posts
Name:
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
I didn't understand what your ideal way to go about this is. Do you want them to buy for her and give them something smaller in return since it's coming from a child?
If so, I would still have the gift come from ALL of you and just spend what you can. $10 gifts for each adult or $25 per couple are fine!
People need to focus on what they are giving and not what the are receiving
Message edited 10/25/2015 11:13:26 AM.
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| Posted 10/25/15 11:10 AM |
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Sweetlax22
LIF Adult
Member since 5/10 1904 total posts
Name:
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
"You are all so generous with DD every Christmas, please do not feel like you have to buy for me and DH as well, seeing our daughter enjoy your gifts is more then enough for us . We know how giving many gifts over the holidays can add up."
Message edited 10/25/2015 11:17:26 AM.
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| Posted 10/25/15 11:17 AM |
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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name:
Christina
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Posted by MrsKR88
Could you maybe suggest doing a grab bag among the adults?
The cousins are actually 3 siblings, plus me and my brother so a gift exchange wouldn't work as the siblings exchange anyways. We do an exchange on the other side of the family where there's more of a mix.
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| Posted 10/25/15 12:08 PM |
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ChristinaM128
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 4043 total posts
Name:
Christina
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Posted by Sweetlax22
"You are all so generous with DD every Christmas, please do not feel like you have to buy for me and DH as well, seeing our daughter enjoy your gifts is more then enough for us . We know how giving many gifts over the holidays can add up."
Like this! Thanks!
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| Posted 10/25/15 12:08 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
I honestly would just leave it as is. I don't understand why you need to spend more on them because they are buying your child a gift. Discuss a price limit with all them that is comfortable for everyone and leave it as is. Once they start having children, you'll be buying for theirs as well.
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| Posted 10/25/15 12:13 PM |
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olive98
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/12 791 total posts
Name:
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Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Why do you have to spend more on them? When we didn't have kids no one spent more on us because we bought gifts for them and thier kids. I spend what I can afford and that's that. I don't think you need to say anything. Just spend what you can afford.
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| Posted 10/25/15 12:26 PM |
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butterfly20
Party of 5 - 2015
Member since 4/06 7390 total posts
Name:
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Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
when hubbys family cut back they just said they would all get gifts for the kids... then they did a grab bag pick a name for whoever wanted to participate. you wrote your name and three things to pick from on the paper.
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| Posted 10/25/15 9:15 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Can you suggest a new tradition... For instance, We ONLY get the kids gifts in my family. The adults exchange wine. Each adult or couple buys a case of their favorite bottle to distribute. So we all leave with 10-15 bottles of different varities. It's a great way to stock up for the year. Clearly, we're winos though hahaha. But maybe something along those lines.
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| Posted 10/25/15 9:36 PM |
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JP826
=)
Member since 9/06 10903 total posts
Name:
Me!! All about ME!
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Posted by ChristinaM128
Posted by Sweetlax22
"You are all so generous with DD every Christmas, please do not feel like you have to buy for me and DH as well, seeing our daughter enjoy your gifts is more then enough for us . We know how giving many gifts over the holidays can add up."
Like this! Thanks!
I like this too. Besides, you never know if they are in the same boat as you financially and don't know the way to say it! You might be doing them a favor as well!
Message edited 10/26/2015 8:57:07 AM.
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| Posted 10/26/15 8:56 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Posted by bunnyluck
Can you suggest a new tradition... For instance, We ONLY get the kids gifts in my family. The adults exchange wine. Each adult or couple buys a case of their favorite bottle to distribute. So we all leave with 10-15 bottles of different varities. It's a great way to stock up for the year. Clearly, we're winos though hahaha. But maybe something along those lines.
I agree. I think the rule should be only buy for the kids.
No gifts for adults.
let's face it, we don't need the scarf or sweater or whatever else they buy for us. If i want something I go buy it myself. I don't need more junk.
And putting money aside, just having to buy for everyone is so stressful. I don't mind spending the money, but the stress of what to get and then getting it, just KILLS the holidays for me.
Oh and i LOVE this wine exchange idea.
I want to join your family!
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| Posted 10/26/15 8:59 AM |
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Re: Cutting back on gift exchange - how to word
Posted by bunnyluck
Can you suggest a new tradition... For instance, We ONLY get the kids gifts in my family. The adults exchange wine. Each adult or couple buys a case of their favorite bottle to distribute. So we all leave with 10-15 bottles of different varities. It's a great way to stock up for the year. Clearly, we're winos though hahaha. But maybe something along those lines.
love this!!
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| Posted 10/26/15 9:05 AM |
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