biting and hitting

hi everyone... I am seeking some more advise...

DS is getting better with the biting however still is doing it - he does hit/push/shove as well.

Daycare is calling me frequently to advise of the incidents... ok fine.

They do not do time outs - rather redirect the behavior and of course indicate that its not acceptable and try and encourage and work on words...

At home we do the same and time out.

I don't know what to do!! I am so stressed about this and suggestions?

He is 19months....

Biting and hitting

Bumping this again because its really becoming a problem.

He is currently the eldest in his toddler room - we have decided with the director that maybe he needs to be toddlers closer to his age - so he will be moving by the 2nd week in august.

Another mommy at daycare saw me upset and suggested we speak to a therapist or EI?

Any thoughts? any one else go through this as well - what steps did you take??

We are doing time out, working diligently on his verbal skills( he talks a bunch) and working on showing emotion ( ouch that hurts )...

But wondering if there is something more we should be doing.

Please any suggestions!
TIA

Re: biting and hitting

My 21 month old has an issue with biting her twin. It can be 3 times in an hour and its while they are playing nicely, not over a toy. I feel like its sensory, but even if it is, EI won't give therapy for sensory unless there is also an issue where they need OT also. DD only gets speech therapy, but doesn't qualify for OT. We have been telling her NO sternly and not saying anything else. Just putting her in time out and giving no attn. at all. No yelling. I think her language delay is partially the reason for her not understanding, but she is getting it now because we are consistent with consequences. I think it's also the age.

Why doesn't day care do time outs?

If you feel he has other delays like motor skills or sensory issues it might be worth calling EI.

Message edited 7/22/2014 11:19:02 AM.

Re: biting and hitting

DD didn't bite but she was a hitter and pincher. She started in a two year old program last fall and I was getting bad reports at every pick up. She was very verbal, but had issues dealing with people getting in her personal space. She would do it at the playground or parties to kids she didn't even know--unprovoked! I even wondered if it was a sensory thing. The school and I stayed on the same page for repercussions. They did time outs so I did them too. I don't know if it was consistent time outs or just a little growing up, but after a few months she pretty much stopped doing it. Now, she's 3.5 and I never hear anything about her hitting.

She never went to daycare but I do think moving your DS to an older room may help. For some reason, DD was always better around older children. She was the oldest in her class because she's a Jan baby, which I felt like didn't help.

Message edited 7/22/2014 9:35:42 PM.

biting and hitting

So they say they don't believe time outs BUT I think its the wording TIME OUT.

They redirect the negative behavior and reinforce the positive and use verbal cues. We had a meeting with the directors and teachers - so they are willing to remove him completely from whatever situation and have some alone time - ( modified time out I suppose).. I think that is fine - its similar to what we do.
WE are using the same phrasing they are so we are together on that..
Perhaps I am just wanting this to be fixed fast - like right now...
I dont think there are any other sensory/speech delays - its just the wretched biting and occasional hitting.

They want me to relax and feel its just a phase as many go through.. I just hate having "that kid" I wasn't a biter... I would be devastated if I was the other mom...

Just for clarification - he is the youngest in the toddler room now - we are moving him to be the one of a couple older toddlers in a new room with a few younger toddlers. He just turned 19 months on the 19th.

I don't know I just want him to stop

Re: biting and hitting

I agree with putting him in a different class.

Thing that I find works is doing time outs & yelling. DD would bite (but only would bite her brother).

Now, she gets bitten by other kids (and pushed and shoved). She yells at them "mama says no biting!"

It is a phase.

Re: biting and hitting

If he speaks, but the others do not (you mentioned he's the oldest) he may be getting frustrated. it's common at that age for kids to hit/bite etc before they really talk to each other.
I think moving him up to the older room will probably help - Good Luck !!!

Re: biting and hitting

Time outs are considered punishment procedures and are not allowed in daycare or school settings.

If you want to fm me, I can give you some suggestions.