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Anyone know anything about adoption??

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ajaysmom
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

810 total posts

Name:
Jessica

Anyone know anything about adoption??

FH wants to adopt my son after we are married. Don't I need to have his biological father basicaly give up his parental rights???? I know we need to get a lawyer and everything, but what are the pocedures? Has anyone done this?? I don't want to "stir" things up right now since the a** hasn't been around in the last 4 1/2 years, and I just think it will make things harder at this point. I mean there are already so many adjustments going on, i think I'd rather wait till we are all settled!!!

Posted 5/19/05 12:41 PM
 
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TAD
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

1199 total posts

Name:
Terri

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

I dont know your situation personally I would let things settle down if I understand you correctly and wait a bit

Posted 5/19/05 12:50 PM
 

Tracey
***********

Member since 5/05

6297 total posts

Name:
Tracey - brideinapril

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

I actually did almost go through this. My DH wanted to adopt my son. His dad hadn't been involved wasn't paying his support, owed me alot of money.
Yes - they have to give up their rights - when I brought this up to him - he seemed all for it - he even wanted to bargain all the money he owed - which at that point was over lets say 15,000 - since I told him that wasn't possible - its not really *my* money to bargain with it was owed to his son. I told him from that point on he wouldn't have to pay support if he gave up his rights but really there was nothing I could do about the other money. He basically was about to go to jail for it anyway.
Fast forward to now, he sold the house he lived in payed all the money he owes and is currently paying his child support. AND he has been utilizing his visitation of every Saturday.
I know I rambled a lot, sorry, but his dad is such a loser and I wish I never brought up the giving up his rights. He is such a bad influence on my son its not even funny.

Posted 5/19/05 12:56 PM
 

ajaysmom
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

810 total posts

Name:
Jessica

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

Posted by Tracey

I actually did almost go through this. My DH wanted to adopt my son. His dad hadn't been involved wasn't paying his support, owed me alot of money.
Yes - they have to give up their rights - when I brought this up to him - he seemed all for it - he even wanted to bargain all the money he owed - which at that point was over lets say 15,000 - since I told him that wasn't possible - its not really *my* money to bargain with it was owed to his son. I told him from that point on he wouldn't have to pay support if he gave up his rights but really there was nothing I could do about the other money. He basically was about to go to jail for it anyway.
Fast forward to now, he sold the house he lived in payed all the money he owes and is currently paying his child support. AND he has been utilizing his visitation of every Saturday.
I know I rambled a lot, sorry, but his dad is such a loser and I wish I never brought up the giving up his rights. He is such a bad influence on my son its not even funny.




No you're not rambling... This is basicaly my situation, ACCEPT I do get child support still... a wopping $63.00 a week, Thing is I don't think he's paying it (long story) I think it's his parents!! I just don't know what to do! THANK YOU THOUGH!!!

Posted 5/19/05 1:04 PM
 

btrflygrl
me and baby #3!

Member since 5/05

12013 total posts

Name:
Shana

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

the biological father must surrender ALL his parental rights. My cousin did this because the father was a deadbeat drug addict that made false promises to see his child, etc. Then they got him to sign his rights so her husband could adopt her child and all was said and done. The bio. father then tried to appeal that, but he signed the papers...can't change it

Posted 5/19/05 3:10 PM
 

eroxgirl
My Loves

Member since 5/05

15697 total posts

Name:
Rebecca

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

Posted by ajaysmom

No you're not rambling... This is basicaly my situation, ACCEPT I do get child support still... a wopping $63.00 a week, Thing is I don't think he's paying it (long story) I think it's his parents!! I just don't know what to do! THANK YOU THOUGH!!!



That's a RIDICULOUS amount for child support!My dad paid more than that in 1982!!!

You might want to give the Family Court a call to get more information on the adoption process: (516) 571-9033

Posted 5/19/05 3:35 PM
 

juju
Welcome to the World!

Member since 5/05

6747 total posts

Name:

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

Posted by Tracey

I actually did almost go through this. My DH wanted to adopt my son. His dad hadn't been involved wasn't paying his support, owed me alot of money.
Yes - they have to give up their rights - when I brought this up to him - he seemed all for it - he even wanted to bargain all the money he owed - which at that point was over lets say 15,000 - since I told him that wasn't possible - its not really *my* money to bargain with it was owed to his son. I told him from that point on he wouldn't have to pay support if he gave up his rights but really there was nothing I could do about the other money. He basically was about to go to jail for it anyway.
Fast forward to now, he sold the house he lived in payed all the money he owes and is currently paying his child support. AND he has been utilizing his visitation of every Saturday.
I know I rambled a lot, sorry, but his dad is such a loser and I wish I never brought up the giving up his rights. He is such a bad influence on my son its not even funny.



I used to work in Family Court and I would see this all time!! Stirring the Pot! Unfortunately, you never know how the other person is going to respond. If you are willing to take the chances....Good Luck!

Posted 5/19/05 4:24 PM
 

JennChris
life moves fast

Member since 5/05

4225 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

My DH and I are in the process of a step parent adoption right now. My ex signed over all his rights because he is an a$$, which was fine with me, my son is MUCH better off with his biological father out of the picture. But anyway...if you go to the family court they have the packet of papers that you need for a step parent adoption and it explains everything in it, they are very helpful there and they will answer any questions you have. GOOD LUCK!Chat Icon

Posted 5/19/05 10:25 PM
 

ajaysmom
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

810 total posts

Name:
Jessica

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

Posted by JennChris

My DH and I are in the process of a step parent adoption right now. My ex signed over all his rights because he is an a$$, which was fine with me, my son is MUCH better off with his biological father out of the picture. But anyway...if you go to the family court they have the packet of papers that you need for a step parent adoption and it explains everything in it, they are very helpful there and they will answer any questions you have. GOOD LUCK!Chat Icon




Lets just say for example the "a$$" as we all like to refer to them!!! Dosn't alow this and wont give up his right, do you know if there is a certain amount of time, like some statute of limitations or something ~ that passes that it would be considered abandonment?? Or would he have to NOT be paying CS??? All I know is this just *****! Why if the loser wants nothing to do with his own child do the courts give them all the rights in the world and they are just total DEAD BEATS!! UGH!!!!! Well Thanks for all the advice I appreciate it!!!

Posted 5/20/05 8:29 AM
 

Tracey
***********

Member since 5/05

6297 total posts

Name:
Tracey - brideinapril

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

Posted by eroxgirl

Posted by ajaysmom

No you're not rambling... This is basicaly my situation, ACCEPT I do get child support still... a wopping $63.00 a week, Thing is I don't think he's paying it (long story) I think it's his parents!! I just don't know what to do! THANK YOU THOUGH!!!



That's a RIDICULOUS amount for child support!My dad paid more than that in 1982!!!

You might want to give the Family Court a call to get more information on the adoption process: (516) 571-9033



They base it on the salary, which in this case blows! But they take 17% - thats all they can do! But if he's making more now than I would definetly get an increase!

Posted 5/20/05 8:48 AM
 

JennChris
life moves fast

Member since 5/05

4225 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: Anyone know anything about adoption??

My ex owes more than $15,000 in child support, hasn't paid a penny! UGH Chat Icon Chat Icon

To start abandonment hearings they must have had no contact for at least 6 months prior to filing the adoption papers. I have the form here with all the info, I'll try to scan it for you. FM me your email Chat Icon

Posted 5/20/05 9:42 AM
 
 

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