Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

Hi. I know sleep training can be a controversial issue but I need help. My daughter has been waking up earlier and earlier every day for over a month.

Some quick points:

• We used the Ferber method with great success when she was a baby and she always slept 7 p.m. - 6:30 a.m. like clockwork until she was about 16 months

• 6:30 turned into 6:15. 6:15 turned into 6 and so on. Now she is waking up every morning at 4 a.m.

• I think the real issue is that previously, when she would wake up at 6:30 or 6:15 we would get her a sippy cup with milk and bring her into our bed while my husband nd I took turns getting ready for work. Despite the fact that she has molars coming in and is getting over a nasty double ear infection, it is becoming clear that she is waking up ONLY because she wants to be in our bed.

• For those of you who swear by Ferber, we have tried that. We have repeatedly done the CIO with wait periods etc and it's not working. This morning she cried through every single wait period for an hour and a half.

My question is: has anyone used that clock that teaches when it is time to be awake and when it is still night night time? I am so desperate at this point - this is literally ruining our lives!

Also just willing to take advice from anyone who has been through this.

Thanks so much!

Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

We use the Kid'Sleep clock but I think 18m is still young for that. I've also read that cio at that time is not great bc they've gotten so much sleep already that they have the stamina to cry for a very long time unlike at bedtime.

Sometimes it's a phase you just have to ride out but hers what helped with my lo around that age. We started leaving a sippy of water in the crib. When she woke I would go in, rock her and sing exactly the same as I did at bedtime and then laid her back down. Usually she would go right back to sleep. Now I can just go in and tell her to lay down and go to sleep,throw the blanket over her and that's it. Of course it depends on the kid, none of that would have worked with my older dd.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

YES. Exactly what I was thinking this morning while she was crying - she just slept for almost 9 hours - she will cry all day if we let her.

I am going to try the sippy cup with water in the crib for sure. Hopefully she can just grab it herself and drift back off to sleep. Thanks so much.

Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

When this happened to us, we stopped going in the room completely as this riled him up even more. Took 2-3 days but it got him back to sleeping until 7ish.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

7pm might be too early of a bedtime. DS never slept more than 10 hours over night, unless he was sick.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

Yes I read that a few places online as well. I'm going to try and move her bedtime to 8 tonight and see if it changes anything.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

My twins will be 18 months next week and they go to sleep no earlier than 9..sometimes a little later and STILL wake up twice a night each...sometimes more with the damn teething. The last 18 months have shaved about 5 years off my life. I'm a zombie 24/7

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

It's probably a phase. In September, my DS was up at 5 am, but usually sleeps until at least 6:30. It took about 2 weeks, but he got back on schedule by himself.

Message edited 10/26/2016 6:30:19 AM.

Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

Ladies.

I'm back.

Put her down an hour later last night and she woke up at 3:30 instead of 4!!!!!!! I battled with her until 5 a.m. and she would fall back asleep for like 20 minutes at a time but then start crying again. My husband eventually took her downstairs at 5 a.m. because I couldn't take it anymore and she stood at the bottom of the stairs screaming for me for almost 45 minutes.

We are literally at the end of our rope. I think the game plan tonight is for my husband to be the one going in and trying to resettle her. She has pretty rough separation anxiety with me these days and obviously that is the core issue.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

You can't just shift the bedtime back by 1 hour for 1 night and expect it to be magical. You should shift bedtime back by 10-15 minutes each night until it gets to a later bedtime. Then give it a few nights and see what happens.

Also, what do you mean that you battled with her? If you left her to cry, she may go back to sleep on her own. I know if I went in to get my baby, she wouldn't go back to sleep in my arms. She's a better sleeper when she self soothes and puts herself back to bed on her own in her crib.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

My DD was waking up until recently in the past month she has been better (she is almost 16 months). We put her down around 8, and on nights she does cry in the middle of the night I don't go in to get her, and eventually she goes back to sleep.

Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

NYCGirl80 - "I battled" means I went in and laid her back down (didn't take her out of the crib), rubbed her back for a minute at the most and left. She then fell back asleep until 4:20. I went in again and repeated this process 2 or 3 times.

We have already tried not going in at all and letting her figure it out on her own. She screamed herself completely awake and cried for 90 minutes straight 2 or 3 mornings in a row.

Since we did the Ferber method when she was a baby, my daughter has always been able to self soothe in the past which is why this has us so confused and frustrated.

Also, I wasn't expecting a magical result by shifting her bedtime, I was just hoping for some sign (no matter how small) of improvement and instead, it was worse.

Re: Almost 18 month old waking up at 4 a.m.

Try reading Precious Little Sleep for insight. There's also a FB group that gives awesome advice.

I think the consensus is that you need to be willing to try CIO for 2 weeks straight before you can determine it won't work. And it could get worse before it gets better.

But early morning wakeups are probably a function of her just not being tired anymore. That's why I'd suggest slowly pushing her bedtime back and seeing what happens. But again, you need to be consistent with it for 2 weeks.