Playing with your kids

How many hours a day do you spend actively playing with your kids? I mean sitting on the floor playing Barbies or games? I'm asking because my 4 year old DD needs my constant attention. I need to play one on one basically the entire day or she cries and says I don't pay attention to her. I love playing with her but I just don't have the time all day. I also have a one year old who is pretty independent with playing. Right now, I'm exhausted but I have an entire day's worth of cleaning. I couldn't even empty the dishwasher yet from this morning. Of course I want to spend time with her and we go out during the day. When we are home I just need to focus on her. Any advice?

Playing with your kids

yup.... my son is 5.5 and this is him to a "T", too :-/ NOTHING keeps his attention independently for more than a couple minutes, he needs me constantly at least sitting next to him while he plays. he's an only child, and i'm home with him, so i can't even use "oh! your brother needs me to help him..." as an excuse LOL
I can say that he does ok if i put some music on while he plays. i can usually get a good 10-15 minutes of independent play from him that way. he just likes "noise" HAHAHA OR sometimes if he's watching something on his iPad, he'll get a toy out and kind of play along with the video he's watching or whatever. i would try putting some music on for her and see if that helps.... good luck!! i know its exhausting!!!!

Re: Playing with your kids

Can you get her to be your helper with whatever you have to do? That way she's still getting the attention she wants and you can get things accomplished around the house.

If my DS wants to play and I for example have to do laundry I tell him to help me and we'll play later. He'll help load the washing machine and unload the dryer.

Re: Playing with your kids

I don't play with them more than a few minutes a day. I spend time with them (reading, art, occasional board games, cooking, cleaning, pool), but they play dolls & pretend by themselves or with each other. I have a 4 year old & almost 6 year old as well as a 1 year old (she doesn't play yet). It's always been like this.

Try blocks, play doh and things that will encourage her to do it by herself.

Re: Playing with your kids

When I'm home with the kids I can't get any housework done. I get frustrated sometimes but I know it's just not happening. I don't know how people do it... whether their kids are really good at playing without an adult or they just plop their kid in front of an iPad to entertain them, I'm not sure. I just play with them the whole time. Otherwise they will be looking for my attention & also I feel guilty because when I'm home with them (evenings and weekends) I feel they deserve my full attention as much as possible since I'm gone all day for work. Also my younger son is 1 & I literally can't let him out of sight for 2 seconds... he gets into everything. So I have to keep my eyes on him constantly. Housework happens after they go to bed, or sometimes I recruit my older son to "help" me with cleaning. Otherwise occasionally I can get something done quick if both DH and I are home, he'll play with the kids & maybe I can take 10 minutes to sweep or throw in a load of laundry or chop vegetables. But that's about it. It's rough & crappy. I miss the days of being able to slowly take care of chores & spend the whole morning cleaning or cooking if I wanted to.... oh well, I guess I'll have time to clean when they're teenagers & want nothing to do with me anymore lol.

Re: Playing with your kids

It varies. Sometimes we are out most of the day so play at home is limited. When we are home most of the day I try and play with her a few hours. I also try and offer reading and games if I've had enough Barbie type stuff--that helps add 1:1 time. But if it was up to her it would be everyday all day! She guilt trips me all the time if I put her off or have to get stuff done. Then she's up my ass the whole time asking if I'm done yet.

ETA: This is a fairly new dynamic for us, me being home FT. When I was working I created that monster by spending all my free time with her before bed and on the weekends. Now she thinks that's how it should be.

Message edited 8/16/2016 9:50:44 PM.

Re: Playing with your kids

Thanks so much everyone. It makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one. I have been feeling so guilty bc I don't want her to be sad. On the other hand, I never leave her for hours watching tv. We are always doing something together. I just can sit on the floor all day and play lol.

Playing with your kids

I find if I spend 30-45 minutes COMPLETELY devoted to playing with my 4 yr old, she can play on her own for another hour after that and does less begging that day overall.

Playing with your kids

My DS could spend an entire day playing by himself if needed. We are at work all day so we play for a bit when we get home and then for a bit after dinner before bed.

Playing with your kids

Until recently my DS would be fine playing by himself, but since school ended, he's been pretty much up my butt wanting me to do every single thing with him (he'll be 4 in November). I take care of both him and my mom during the day and I'm so tired between the two of them needing constant attention that I legit fall over at bedtime. Lol.

I've started having him help me do things: sweep, sort laundry, even cook. It keeps him busy and gives us that time together as well.