How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

I'm having trouble with this one
Ds is 4

He has No problem saying "what did you bring me" mostly to my mom because to be honest she brings them stuff often.

He has a twin sister and always ends up wanting what she got. He likes what he gets but always wants her stuff too even if it is girly. Today wAs over a rapunzel doll.

He threw a fit! Crying yelling etc. while my mom is understanding I was mortified! Nothing I said worked

How do you handle these situations. I want to work on this before it becomes an issue with other people besides family

How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

I have no idea but when you find out let me know. Unfortunately it's become an issue wherever we are. It's both of my twins. I've always taught them to be polite. When they get something say thank you. When they want something say please. But over this past year it's, what did you bring me. Where is mine. I want something else. Give me it now. I want it. It's so embarrassing when we are at a friends house or somewhere else. I always feel like it's a reflection of our parenting.

Re: How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

does he mind if his twin sister plays with the toy he got. Maybe hAve them trade and play with the others toy for a bit. Maybe it's just the initial idea of wanting it but then not caring after that. I know if my son has something my dd wants it too. He gives t to her for a second and then she's over it. He's 4 and knows the drill.

Re: How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

I have an issue with "what did you bring me" with my kids.
It's simply because grandma spoils them.
I've asked that she no longer does the "I have something for you" routine. They should like to see her because of her: not gifts.

As for the wanting what the other has, with boy & girl, I let them play with each other's stuff but do as PP suggested: give other new toy to other child. Sometimes it works (but not 100%). Another thing that works is to physically separate them so they can enjoy new toys solo.

Eta: I do think this all is normal behavior: you can tweak it, but I see it in all kids!

Message edited 3/9/2015 10:16:25 PM.

How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

I'm sure the fact that they're twins brings a whole unique dynamic, but if it was DD I would probably tell her you can have what you were given and say thank you or you can have nothing. That usually gets her to change her tune very quickly. I would imagine an hour later neither of them will care if the other plays with their new toy.

I would also maybe have a talk with grandma and ask that she not bring anything for a few visits (or at least one!) and then have a talk with him before she comes about what is expected of him. I haven't dealt with DD asking what did you bring yet but I know it's only a matter of time. For now, she just is excited to see her grandparents and I wish they would realize that she doesn't need presents to be happy to see them.

How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

It's very common with the age. My son just turned 5 and my younger son is going to be 3. My mom also is very generous with gifts when she visits. The 5 year old has cried a lot because he wanted what his little brother had - even though it wasn't something that would interest him in the least...

How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

We had an issue with this for a short period of time last year around birthday, Christmas, and a few other events where people who don't normally see us brought little gifts. I couldn't take it. They were embarrassing me and honestly it made me upset and felt like it was beyond an age thing. So I got very stern with it. If you asked/weren't gracious you lost your gift. I know I made some people uncomfortable but to me the hysterics was less embarrassing than the expectations and ungrateful behavior. It put an end to it quickly... But I followed through. One little apology didn't earn the gift back.

They are kids and I do understand how this happens... Good luck!

Re: How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

Thank you for your replies
I think I need to say it's what you got or nothing. I already let them share which dd was really good about last night and he just wouldn't get past it.

Re: How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

Posted by allIwant

Posted by luckysmom

I have no idea but when you find out let me know. Unfortunately it's become an issue wherever we are. It's both of my twins. I've always taught them to be polite. When they get something say thank you. When they want something say please. But over this past year it's, what did you bring me. Where is mine. I want something else. Give me it now. I want it. It's so embarrassing when we are at a friends house or somewhere else. I always feel like it's a reflection of our parenting.

I do feel part of it is a twin thing. Up until recently they usually got the same things. But now that they are older the interests are different. DD is pretty good about it she could careless most of the time. Ds however loves himself some princesses

Re: How do you deal with an ungrateful toddler?

I would take away the new toys and tell them they can have them back when they have apologized and can be better behaved. I would also tell grandma to stop buying presents for now. If they whine for the toy, I would calmly sit in front of them and at a whisper explain what they are doing is wrong and why. I found at that age, whispering when they expected you to react, got a bigger reaction. I also like to be face to face with them.

My son did ask my inlaws what do you have for me because they Always would bring a toy. I had to ask them to stop bringing presents for one visit so they would be just excited to see them and not the gift.

Message edited 3/10/2015 10:03:41 PM.