Very Shy Kids and School

DD started preschool in September (3 mornings a week). She was so excited to go, and now she has gotten to the point where she doesn't ever want to go (Monday AMs are the worst). She is VERY shy, which is the reason we sent her to school and also probably the reason she isn't liking it. Her teacher said she will speak to her when spoken to and she has one little friend that she plays with regularly, but doesn't play with any of the other children regularly. I feel so bad making her go, but I really want her to start opening up and socializing.

Anyone else go through this? Did your LO start to like school? She always seems happy when I pick her up, and she never makes a fuss about going in once we are there, but in the AM it is about an hour of "NOT SCHOOL" over and over.

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

My kid is not shy at all & doesn't "classically" socialize at school. He plays with a different kid every day (and will play with anyone).

I think some kids have friends & others just don't form that strong of a bond at 3 & 4.

DS has no problem going to school though (he likes the class & lessons).

Very Shy Kids and School

DD1 was VERY shy and was exactly like your DD at first but eventually she got in the routine and now she's in PreK and LOVES it. No more Monday AM of "Not School". Give it some time. School really made a huge difference. She is much more social. She isn't as shy anymore either.

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

It could be an age thing? My DD just started preschool this year. I live in MD and the school cutoff is 9/1, her bday is 9/7 so she is one of the oldest in her class, she turned 4 the first week of school (she'll be just about 6 when she starts Kindergarten). She would have never, ever survived preschool if we sent her the year before when she was just turning 3. She was so shy and socially awkward. However, now, she is THRIVING and counts down the days to school, has made a million friends, and is sad when school is closed for a holiday. She definitely would not have been like this last year.

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

My kids aren't necessarily shy, but older one is more reserved. Sending her to school was the best thing I did, she loved going and still loves school in 2nd grade. So long as she's happy at pickup, I'd keep sending her. She'll come into her own.

Very Shy Kids and School

My twin boys just turned 3 on Oct 28. I was just told that none of the kids really play with each other yet. This will change as they get closer to 4yrs.

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

My DD is shy.
She started school in sept ...she will be 4 in January
She was weepy at first when I was leaving but she is doing better.

Her teacher says she will talk with other kids but wont talk in front of the whole class or in front of all the kids at her table. Her teacher isn't concern and says she will get there.

I have noticed an improvement in her. In the past if a cashier said hi to her or asked her name she wouldn't even look at them. Now she will answer and say hi.

She even took a dance class this weekend. I wasn't in the room but they told me after 5 min or so she was fully participating and dancing. This is HUGE for her.

Re: Very Shy Kids and School

I dont have any kids like that but I WAS that kid. I was painfully shy and still dont really speak unless spoken to around people I dont know.

She is going to be OK, I promise. She might be shy the rest of her life, and I was. However, I met a group of really good friends growing up and they were all I needed. I wasnt popular but I wasnt an outcast either, just ran under the radar and I preferred it.

I have to say, what helped, was my mom arranging for me to have what is known today as "playdates" I was shy in big groups, but one on one, I did much better and it helped me form bonds with people I may not have otherwise. Maybe arrange a playdate with the one child she is friendds with and one other, and keep doing that to introduce new kids in a smaller less intimidating circumstance so then when she goes to school, she sees her "new friend" that she just played with and starts to play with her as well.