Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

We have 3 under 3 and it's STRESSFUL! I'm not saying I don't yell at my kids ever, but I feel like all DH does is yell at the kids. He has no patience for anything. Like when One of them cries for me at night, he immediately goes in their room and talks to them very firmly to lay down and go to bed. Doesn't even try did out what's wrong. And if I go up there, he yells at me that I'm feeding into it. So pretty much when my kids cry, they new to get over it. He has no patience for accidentally spilling something or for them acting like normal 2.5 year olds. No patience for noise, it's getting quite annoying and starting to affect our marriage. Obviously I am going to stick up for my kids and they are starting not to like him. DD has said she doesn't like him to his face and honestly, I don't blame her. Don't get me wrong, he's a good dad most of the time but he looses his patience to easily. He was also bright up this way so he's clearly doing what he knows. We were fighting about it the other day and I mistakenly told him "you asked why your kids hate you, this is why"! ??. Wrong, I know. I apologized, but I seriously don't like the way he talks to my kids sometimes. Is this how a lot of DH's are with the kids?

Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

Honestly no. My dh is not perfect and he def does things that make me want to choke him. But when my dd cries especially in the middle.of the night he will go in and pick her up. And hes very loving and patient eith our dd. Sometimes more patient than me when shes throwing food on the floor or water on the table lol...

I understand what your saying about it being the way he was brought up. But i feel people have a choice in life as to how they want to behave. And what path they choose. Men always have a harder time with this especially admitting or seeing what their doing. There were things my mom did when bringing me up that i would never do to my dd. I am able to recognize that and i actively make sure i dont do it.
I say talk to him. When hes in clearly in a good mood and receptive. Just say you want to know if there is a way he can be more patient with the kids. Let him know how upset they are. Ask if you can help him in some way. And honestly i would suggest he see a therapist and you guys may want to consider marriage counseling.
I totally get why its affecting your marriage. I get pissed when anyone especially my husband tells me how to parent or when my husband offers advice but i choose to do things my way and he gets angry at me.

I would even ask him if he really wants to the kind of dad that his kids thomk dont like them. Cause they must be thinking that.

Re: Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

I feel like I'm the one with no patience, that's why I only have one
I read something that said one of the reasons it's so hard to discipline your child correctly is because you have to be firm but at the same time you don't want to crush their spirit.
It said that children should remember a home filled with laughter instead of yelling when they look back.
Since I read this, I've been trying to make jokes out of things that annoy me or make little games with DD instead of yelling & being angry all the time.
Maybe you can tell him that they will respond better if he lightens up a little (I'm sure you have) but if you can get the point across that he could be hurting their feelings & it makes them act worse because they can't be themselves around him.
I'm sure he doesn't want to lose his patience but 3 under 3 must be out of control & crazy!...but fun, adorable & 3 times the love
He just needs to focus on the good part of it, that's what I do when I feel like I'm ready to loose it!
Good luck

Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

Thanks ladies! We talked about it last night and he gets very defensive. He doesn't see it as yelling but being firm. He's been a little more conscious about how he's been speaking to them and reprimanding the today. He fell asleep on the couch last night and didn't come to bed until 5:00. He apologized to me when he came to bed. So we'll see what happens. If I mentioned any type of therapy whether for him or marriage counseling for us he'd either laugh at me or start thinking I want a divorce. I'll see what happens before saying anything else. Hopefully he continues to be a little more conscious about the Way he speaks to them.

Re: Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

We both do.
My DD is enough to push Ghandi to the point of needing an anger management class.

Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

My husband is WONDERFUL FATHER & will cuddle, play etc. I do however feel he has a short fuse.......

Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

Thanks ladies! I'm not saying he isn't a great father. He definitely is. But like you said, he has a short fuse and I feel like it's too much. Maybe because I'm their mother. Don't get me wrong, my kids can push you over the edge. They are not easy at all. But I juT want him to try and have a little more patience with them.

Re: Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

I understand how you feel. DH also has very little patience at times and it does bother me and it does affect our marriage. There are times I think he is an amazing dad and other times I want to hurt him

Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

My hubby doesn't yell nor play with my kids. he does nothing to them. hahaha

Re: Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

DS definitely has less tolerance for the whining, crying, constant need to be entertained LOL BUT i worked at an elementary school for 8 years before becoming having my own kid, so i built up my tolerance HAHA
That said, he doesn't really yell or talk stern to DS too much. He just has less tolerance for the whining, so he tells him to "go see mommy", or he'll yell at me "can you entertain him please??" that drives me a little nuts, but what can you do? When he does spend time with DS, he is a good dad, teaches him how to use tools on the car, builds trains with him, they fly his toy helicopter around. I just think its this busy, whiny almost 3 year old phase that DH has trouble with.... I'm thinking they'll have a blast together when DS gets a little bit older.

Re: Does your DH lose patience with the kids often?

DH and I both have our moments where DS can drive us nuts and we yell. Fortunately we tend to balance each other out. But I wanted to touch on something else you mentioned. You said you stick up for your kids, and that's fine. But I hope yore doing it in private and not in front of them. You and your DH are supposed to be a team. You don't have to agree with him all the time, and you're welcome to call him out and discuss things, but it's not fair to do that in front of your kids.